life happens

Oh the memories that family pictures creates

2011-10-16T21:13:00.000-07:00

There is nothing like family pictures to build family ties....
NOT!!!
Why is it that my normally loving children have melt downs when it comes to family picture time?
Am I asking too much to have them clean up and put on a smile?

Apparently the answer to that question is YES!
I don't know how families take pictures each year--
I don't think it would bode well for our family relationships if we did.

If it is not one child it is another..
{{{SIGH}}}

A few years back i tried to get family pictures taken on the beach in Rosirito, Mexico..
ahhh...the best laid plans.
I made the mistake and asked a child to move to a different spot in the picture
at which point the said child told me that they were fine and did not need to move.
Who needs composition anyway
--or balance in a photo--
not our family
(yes this is all written tongue in cheek)
at which point the said child went climbing off in a big huff
(maybe that was the start of their love of climbing?)

All i want is some cute smiles...
I know they have them in them.

This will be the last picture that we will be able to have together for awhile so i wanted to take advantage of my friend Katie and her wonderful photography skills while we were hanging out in Rocky Point--I would like to believe that she took off from school and flew home just to take our picture, but i think the love she has for her family had more to do with her coming home than her love of taking my families picture...anyway i digress. So at some point I think she asked for a smile and that managed to set a child off--Ahh the joys of being a parent. It is not enough for them to just embarrass you--they need to do it in front of others to really make it count. So we went walking down the beach after she told us that we could take five to cool off--unfortunately the love fest escalated during those five minutes and i found myself watching my boys show ultimate love for each other as they rolled around and wrestled in the sand like three year olds--even fighting. My normally peace at any price husband felt left out of the fun and got involved showing them that he is still boss and can kick their butts--lol

fUnNY now...not so much then....

I really liked when the child threw himself down in the sand and got irritated at the rocks and went to kick them, and then realized it would probably hurt him more than it would the rock....who said he doesn't learn from his mistakes. The rest of the photo shoot went off with a few snarls and a lot of attitude but i am hoping that in the midst of all of the family fun we managed to get a few good pictures. One word that managed to get us all to smile was the word Hemorrhoid--I guess you go with what works lol. Katie had Hubby and I take a picture together at which point she asked us to "kiss". That was a hoot. We were having a laugh fest and finally did manage to muster up a smooch worthy of our love--lol. Oh the things that the camera catches.

Once again, family pictures did not disappoint on the memories that it created...it is a good thing that we really do love each other and manage to smile on the days we are not having our picture taken--because there are a lot more of those days than there are of the perfect outfit picture days.

growing up before my eyes

2011-06-22T20:24:00.001-07:00

Kids have a way of growing up and changing. It is just the way it is. Happens whether we want it to or not.

2nd born son has been away at scout camp and now he is at wrestling camp. Wrestling camp is across town and they are actually rooming at the University. He has been gone for 5 days and will be gone for another 5 days. Seeing as how he forgot some stuff we ran over there today and hung out with him for a bit. In just the short time he has been gone it looked to me like he had grown. This kid is changing right before my eyes--it is only when i step back and reflect do i realize how much he is changing in such a short period of time.

Recently at his promotion they had some pictures of the kids. One of the mothers commented on how young the group of boys looked--more specifically my son. She said "Oh, that must have been sixth grade"--only problem was my son was not at that school in sixth grade. That picture was actually seventh grade--less than two short years and my little boy changed into a teenager. He now weighs as much-maybe more than his brother who is four years older and is now taller than his dad.

I have added some pictures over the past few years of him in his scout uniform so you can see the change as well

April 24, 2008--11 1/2

September 18 2008--11 years 10 months

August 20, 2009--12 years 9months

13 years 4 months

February 20, 2010

May 19th 2011--14 1/2

the most recent documented scout picture of how he is changing--

he finally got his LIFE rank officially--

yes it is already sewn on his uniform--i refused to take it off from when his brother got his

My/our goal if for him to get his EAGLE SCOUT before he outgrows his shirt.

At the rate he is growing it better happen sooner than later!

'sploding

2011-06-06T22:18:00.026-07:00

It was just a short while ago when i spoke about
things that should NOT be kept in the car when it gets hot.
One of the things on my list was SODA....
'member why?
Cause the cans will explode when it gets hot....
guess what???

Somewhere between Saturday night and Sunday afternoon i managed to forget my own advise.
Literally the tops popped.
I brought in the remainder of the cans to wash them off and i put them in the sink--
only to have one EXPLODE like a gun had gone off.
Then another one started shooting off like a geyser--
Nothing like sticky soda all over everything.
One more reason i should quit this bad habit...
but sometimes it just tastes so good....
but only when it is really cold and over ice....

which brings me to another story about soda....

A few years back when i was in New Hampshire working I was craving a soda to kick start my morning.
We had gone to breakfast at this little bar across the street from the hotel--it was yummy and i asked for a soda to go. I was expecting a soda in a cup with ice--not what i got. Instead i was handed a bottle of soda.
They did not have to-go cups and ice was rather a foreign idea. Later that morning we had to go to the airport to pick up some boxes--off we went. On the way back we figured we would find a gas station/convenience store and pick up a soda there. I live in the land of pharmacy's and convenience stores on just about every corner so i didn't think it would be a problem. Let's just say it was short of looking for a needle in a haystack. We did finally find a gas station that had a sign outside totting its grand opening. We thought we had struck gold. We walked in and walked around looking for the fountain drink machine--only it was not to be found. What convenience store does NOT have a fountain drink machine? When i inquired about soda he told me he had bottles. When i asked about ICE he responded to me. "Mame', 9 months out of the year when we want ice, all we do is stick our hand out the window." Case in point--I guess it gets cold there, so no real need for ice in the drink. Such a foreign idea that it actually is cold other places--although i am liking the idea of some cooler weather right now. I know that summer had only begun and i am already getting tired of it. The only way i will get through it is with LOTS of ICE...and maybe some Ice Cream

mom gives a mohawk

2011-05-25T22:17:00.000-07:00

I am sitting here try to take in the fact that today is the last day of school for most of my kiddo's.
I seems like it was just a month or so ago that I the year started....
My senior was done last week and has been hanging out the last few days waiting for graduation.

My sophomore has been frantically finishing up her online class and studying for exams that she says are going to be easy. I ask her "why are you stressing over studying when they are going to be easy?" and her response is that "she would rather be prepared... just in case." Can't really argue with that logic.

My soon to be high school er is counting the days till he is out of his school--but that does not keep him from continuing to cause havoc and bring home a note because he was being a tad bit too "chatty" in one of his classes. I also am counting the days till he is done with that school. It has been somewhat of a thorn in my side...so grateful that my husband took point on that one. I don't think, actually, I know that i could not have dealt well with the "rules" and pompous attitudes that exude from that school.

SOOOO....with that statement being said I am allowing and even encouraging my soon to be freshman to rebel against the man just a bit. He has promotion tomorrow. Personally I find the whole idea of promotion a bit ludicrous. I had never heard of it until I moved here...but it seems to be a tried and true tradition that for whatever reason we can not give up. It has been scaled WAY back over the years. I guess things were getting really out of hand with Limos and fancy dresses and it being celebrated with the idea that this was indeed the end of the kids schooling instead of the start to the next step. Why we celebrate the kids finishing the 8th grade is beyond me--I expect it. That is part of the continuous step to HIGH School graduation--then college.

Promotion has changed since my oldest child did it. When she promoted it was held in the multi purpose room/cafeteria. We had tickets. There were student speeches, and awards. It was a bit of a celebration. Then the next child came two years later. Same sort of event but scaled back. Then my third child. Talk about a change. Hers was held in the classroom. It was a joke, but for those looking for validation of promoting, I guess it fit. I spoke with a teacher/friend about it and she made the comment that the ENTIRE district was scaling way back the idea of promotion, with out completely eliminating it. Fine with me--I would even be in favor of elimination but alas my opinion was not asked...So here we are a promotion time again. Apparently my son's school did not get the SCALED back memo. NOOOOO.! We are having a promotion breakfast...catered....away from the school...at a church. We had to RSVP months ago. They are charging $18. per person for the luxury of going to promotion. Personally if I am going to pay $18. per person I would rather pick where and what i am eating. And really? $18. for breakfast foods? When we spoke with the principal about this we were told "the kids have worked really hard and they deserve to be recognized"
WHATEVER....I can tell you that my daughter who's promotion that was held in the classroom worked just as hard, if not harder than this son. So I have to take off work and pay for the opportunity to watch my son promote. Personally I am going just to see their reaction.

Reaction to what you ask? Remember the part of being a rebel and sticking it to the man. Well.....in all their ability to make my son conform, he has. Until NOW.!? He mentioned weeks ago that he thought it would be funny if he had a ~~flat top~~ Mohawk for promotion. I agreed. My husband was not in favor of it. He does not like to make waves. I on the other hand, like the bumpy ride on occasion.
I caved.
Or actually.
I shaved, is more like it.

It is only hair.

It is only temporary.

It will grow back.

He was told that he has to have a "normal" haircut to perform his priesthood duties. He agreed. It could always be worse--he could have dyed it some wild color or even bleached his hair like his brother did. I know hubbers is not happy with my encouragement of the rebelling against the man--and the fact that i cut the Mohawk right before seminary graduation--but it wasn't his seminary graduation. Plus if it was going to be done i wanted it to look good, and if his brother had done it, there was no telling how it would have turned out. I did have to do some touch up the next morning before his actual promotion....but that is a blog entry for another day

Senior pictures

2011-05-15T21:16:00.002-07:00

Time is a funny thing.
There are moments that fly by and others that creep along.
Has it really almost been a month since i posted last?
March felt like it moved at a snails pace--
April moved at light speed,
and then here we are in the middle of May already?!
School will be ending for my senior son this week--
and then next week is graduation and the end of school for the rest of my piglets.

Summer here we come....

This was my sweet boy just four years ago at 8th grade graduation

such the cute boy.

He has grown (some).

Put on some weight

and gotten (some) facial hair,

and his braces finally removed.

Time does not stand still--it keeps moving.

Life keeps changing.

Here he is four years later....

red pants and all.

He is his own unique person

This has to be one of my favorites--I love the reflection in the window

These pictures were taken by his friend Katie.

She is amazing.

(Katie is the one on the left with her sister)

Since i have known her since birth I can say that.

She has become quite the accomplished photographer

(check out her blog)

Jake and Katie have a special relationship--
When they were young pups on the playground they were swinging on this tire swing that we fondly refer to as the hurler. Let's just say that centrifugal force does not bode well for the person next to you when you loose your lunch---Katie has either blocked out that memory, or has chosen to forgive him and his childhood indiscretion. Not that he had much control over it. I am soooo grateful for the fact that she was able to draw the smile out of him--he is not the easiest in that regard.
My number two child will graduate...in four more years and i will loose two more--leaving little man to hang out with his dad and I...ALONE. It is hard to believe we are at this point in our lives...fun and yet sad at the same time. These pictures are just proof that time marches on and waits for no man.

Changes will happen whether i want them to or not. I am excited and nervous to think about what the future will hold for my kidlins. I guess i just need to embrace these moments/memories and be thankful for the pictures that have frozen them in time.

“We all have our time machines.

Some take us back,

they're called memories.

Some take us forward,

they're called dreams."

The anticipation of GOOD Friday

2011-04-20T21:34:00.027-07:00

This Friday is Good Friday--
I am ready to declare it GREAT Friday.
I am ready for a break.
I am ready for a day to play
I only wish i didn't have to work tomorrow...
I am sick and tired of it.
The worst part of working in the morning is that it is going to start even earlier than usual.
Some knuckle head at work decided to add another student to this route i am driving
and i have to pick her up at 5:45 am
--which means i need to be at work even earlier.....
way to early if you ask me.
The only redeeming grace is that the sun is coming up earlier and earlier,
so getting up isn't quite as bad--but it still sucks.

This has been a tough week around our house--
more disappointments
and then van issues on top of it.
I think it is safe to say that both my hubby and i are emotionally exhausted.
We are both ready to get away...
even our little trip that we planned was almost derailed by a need for a ~~expensive~~ new transmission that was not going to be done in time for us to use our van,
thank goodness for a grandma with a van, and her willingness to let us borrow it--
that way we can still get away...
Even if it will only be for a day

how much sleep is too much?

2011-04-17T22:27:00.000-07:00

Today i woke up and felt like I had been ran over by a Mac Truck.I have been battling a sore throat and runny nose the last few days, and in my mind was the debate,
Allergies, Cold, Flu or just plain tired?--
I am not sure if it was not a bit of all of them.
After i decided that i was not up to going to church,
i crawled back into bed and slept...
and slept....
and slept!
Does sleeping for 8 extra hours constitute a NAP or a new day?
I slept the day away with only a few minutes of alertness to get something to drink and snack on and then i was back to bed.
I did awake feeling better, but still not up to par.

I remember as a young child
my mom wanting me to take a nap.
I remember fighting her over it,
explaining to her that naps were for "babies",
and i was not a baby and therefore did not need a nap.
She then went on to tell me that daddy was taking a nap--
what could i say to that?
My young brain could not find any logic as to why my father would be taking a nap.Being an adult now i understand the attraction of finding a few hours rest in the middle of the day.

With all the sleep i got today,
The real question is if i will be able to sleep tonight/
My sleep has been so messed up this past week--
there were nights when i got plenty of asleep only to awake and feel so tired that i would come home from work in the morning and go back to sleep till i had to go back in the afternoon. Then there was the night where i couldn't sleep and stayed up till 3:30am and only go TWO hours sleep and went on to work the entire day and was FINE?!
So i sit and wonder what tonight is going to bring me--
one of restful sleep or....?

public service announcement--marshmallow mush

2011-04-14T21:37:00.022-07:00

Can i just say
sometimes it is the small and simple things
that make me happy?!

I found these little bit of yumminess at the dollar store the other day.

In true Goldilocks fashion,

they are bigger than a miniature marshmallow,

but smaller than a full size--

they are the momma bear marshmallow--

Just right for this momma.

And to boot, they are tasty with different flavors-- not your boring bland white marshmallow. Not that i don't like plain marshmallows-- I just like them dried out. Some might even refer to them as stale?. Is it strange that i like dried out, plain white mallows? There is just something about the crunch that i find appealing. In fact i have been known to leave the bag open in hopes that they will dry out-- unfortunately they usually don't last that long...

So what do Marshmallows and public service announcements have to do with this blog? This blog is about many things, but the last thing i want this to turn into is a blog about the weather. Currently we are riding the weather roller coaster-one day we are having unusually HOT weather and then one week later we have dropped over 40 degrees and it is raining, and dare i say COLD?.
It is hard to know how to dress-

the question is: bikini or thermals?

(EWWEEE--what a mental picture-- the bikini it out of the question).

So, really the question is:

--expose the pastey white (marshmallow like) legs

or leave them covered?

There are things you take for granted when the weather is cool. Things people never have to think about unless you live in the toasty warm state of AZ.--Phoenix specifically. The things i am talking about are the things you can"t leave in the car even for a few hours.

Growing up (when life was much safer) my mom would run errands with us kids (not by our choice or hers). Often, if it was a quick errand (quick is a relative term when you are a kid) she would leave us in the car--usually with the windows up and when it finally would get warm (again relative term when living in CO) with the windows down. She didn't worry about us being taken (no one would want the whole brood--we were too onerie) The only thing that she worried about was whether or not we'd kill one another while she was gone. Now this is NOT something i recommend these days, but i can understand why it was so appealing--and lets face it, we lived on the wild side. We ran around the neighborhood (without cell phones) and my mom's only requirement was that we were home by dark. But this blog entry is not about my carefree safe childhood--it is about leaving things in the car.

Here in AZ,in the summer, even a few minutes in the car can leave you breaking out in a full sweat (and that is with the AC on). Once years ago, I was taking a sleeping child into a friends house and left my keys sitting in the car. My older children shut the door and the automatic door lock--LOCKED. It wouldn't have been such a problem--you can always get a spare key (only i was 20 minutes from my house)--but for the fact that when they locked the door, they locked my baby in as well. There he sat, in his car seat--smiling through the window at me.

(dang he was a cute little bugger)

It was high noon in the middle of the summer and I knew the temperature in the car was going to increase real quick. We tried breaking a window to no avail and quickly gave up and called the fire department. They did manage to get him out and declared him FINE (i am still left wondering about his humor and wonder if his brain didn't get a bit baked)--he was a tad red, but really no worse for the wear. On occasion I hear about parents leaving a kid in the car by mistake and I think of that day--things would have turned out much different if i hadn't realized he was in there. It makes me sad to think about that kind of loss--but i do understand how those accidents can happen.

Once again today i am reminded just how warm it can get in the car.
Let me preface this by saying that it hasn't really been HOT this week--
the weather has been
BE-UTE-I-FUL

--lest i say almost PERFECT these last few days.

So nice in fact, that i was able to open the windows in my bus and read and nap without melting. So with all this perfect weather i never gave a second thought about it being TOO HOT in my car --that was until i went to grab something out of my backseat and saw this.

Apparently while i thought the weather was perfect,

it was a just a tad warmer than i thought in my car--

warm enough to melt the DNA of the marshmallows bunnies into each other

I had just bought these yesterday.

Unfortunetly, I don't think there will be any recovering from this though.
Just one big ooeey gooey mess.

Other things i have learned over the years not to leave in the car when it gets hot--

Deodorant--yes it melts as well, but it does leave the car smelling, ohh so fresh and clean.
Candles--do i really need to explain? Again, good smell but often the wick goes MIA
Glue sticks--hot glue--glue glue--they ALL melt! It is NOT pretty, and leaves quite the MESS, because it is glue! And when glue cools off, it glues everything back together--even things you didn't want glued--like the bag it was in.
Magazines and Books--again back to that glue thing. This time it manages to UN-glue the bindings and you end up with lots of pages loose
Crayons--creates a waxy mess--not so good on the carpet or upholstery
Bottles of Milk--now it has been a long time since i have found one of these hidden gems in my car but i can still remember the curdled solid mass it was. Often that bottle would get tossed before i would dare to open it
Chapstick--ends up in the cap--or melted sideways
Soda in cans--when it gets hot enough it will EXPLODE. Yes, i am afraid to say that it has happened...MORE than once over the years(you think i would have learned)

Now i feel i can add to this list...

MARSHMALLOWS

I am sure there are more things that i have overlooked--

they will have to be added to the list at a later date.

I know the heat is coming--

my melted marshmallows
only served as a reminder of that fact.
In true Hill Street Blues fashion I will say:

"Let's be safe out there people"
Time to make sure everything gets brought in from the car, lest we have any more "accidents"

POINGO and Sunday with the BOYS

2011-04-10T22:42:00.007-07:00

Ah Sunday--a day of rest. Usually you can find me taking full advantage of the rest part... buried under the blankets in my bedroom enjoy an afternoon nap. I guess with the day off yesterday, that eliminated my need for a nap. Instead i spent the afternoon hanging out with my boys upstairs, while my girls were buried under blankets, taking naps in their room. Maybe that has something to do with fact that girls(for the most part)could care less about Sunday sports. I really didn't care who was playing or even won the US Open (at least i think that was the golf tournament) The men on the other hand acted as if they had a vested interest. Little man has had these Poingo books. He LOVES them. Months ago his little poingo stick quit working. If you know our little man he does not give up when he wants something-- needless to say that the inoperable poingo stick was a large source of consternation for US as well as him. He just could not understand WHY it was not working. I called the company and they sent us a new one--problem was it was the NEW one. As in: they redesigned the toy and the new one would not work on our old books. Well now that was no good. In fact the new one had a major flaw in my mind--it had these things that you had to plug into the stick in order to make it work. If that was how it had been when i originally gotten the books i would have NEVER bought it. Who needs parts to lose? Never mind the fact that each time you change books you have to change cards--which means we as the adults would be in charge of that. The old one was much easier and user friendly--he didn't have to plug anything in and the only thing he would lose would be the books or the stick itself. I called the company and to see if i could get the old version of the stick sent to me. NOPE! They no longer make it? Well i did proceed to tell them what i thought of their new design and explained as a parent the major flaw. Was there anywhere i could get one of these sticks??? Again i was told that they no longer manufacture them and have NONE in their warehouse--SIGH--what is a mom to do? Well as i was talking to the Poingo man i had googled Poingo on my computer, and low and behold there was a site that was selling this little golden stick. I NEVER buy anything off the computer--but this was dropped into my lap. Not only did they have the original poingo they also had some other books for CHEAP. I could not resist...I knew how happy it would make my little man . And HAPPY he is! This little boy has been playing with these for the last two day It has kept him busy for most of the day. While i was taking pictures of little man and his books, i took the opportunity to aim my camera at the rest of the people in the room. Ever feel like everyone is against you? once they figured out that i had a camera in hand they quickly buried their faces even the dog who had been resting her head on a pillow lifted it up and turned away and then she gave me a yawn to show how bored she was with the whole process even my husband got in on the obnoxious picture face--

the finger on the nose was just for the camera here he is with the glazed over golf look and here is the whole reason the camera was in the room to begin with.

My husband wanted a picture of the three boys hanging out together I know it won't always be like this.

I wish i had gotten a picture of the two older boys sleeping on the couch together...

so sweet...reminded of me of when they were little--

somedays i wish we could go back...

like when they actually liked getting their picture taken

Rain brings out the procrastination in me

2011-04-09T09:27:00.008-07:00

I have today OFF!!
I can't even begin to tell you how happy/content that is making me.
Knowing i could sleep in...
and wouldnt'cha ya know it,
I was awake at 7am.?
So much for REALLY sleeping in--
but i did stay in bed...
and that my friends,
is thee BEST!

I have been abandoned by the entire family.
I am home ALONE--
peace, quiet and tranquility.
{{{AHHHH}}}

I should sorta feel guilty cuz i sent the older boys with little man to attend an Easter egg hunt at church. Sometimes i LOVE having extra drivers and being able to pawn off unwanted tasks. I am trying to feel guilty-- but it is not working.

Instead i am watching the rain fall outside,
listening to it with my window open,
and I am feeling grateful for the fact
that i am curled up under a blanket.
Warm and toasty... (
was it only a week ago we were having a record high of 100 degrees,
and now we are having a record low for a high?)

I am telling myself that the boys are bonding--
and they are probably sharing the candy in the eggs--
we all know i don't need the candy--it is better that they are there to share.
Afterall we know that boys never outgrow easter egg huntsas documented here.

I should get up and be motivated,
but i recently read this article on Procrastination...
I didn't actually finish the article,
but the part i read said it can't be helped,
that we are wired that way.

So many things to do today.
I guess i need/should make a list of priorities.
Where to start?
Maybe i will just sit here a few more minutes
and debate that eternal question.
Just me and the dog hanging out.....

So the hubby and I and the son we are preparing to send on a mission, are each working on reading the Book of Mormon by June 1st. We thought we would have each family member do it, but we have some less than willing participants --AHHH--free agency. Don't ya just love it sometimes? I realize that June is just around the corner-- why is it so hard to motivate myself to sit down and read-- I mean, I just finished a trilogy of books in less than three weeks?. My sweet hubby found a website that breaks down the reading into bite size pieces. You put in the date you want to finish and it sends you an e-mail each day with your reading task--
I think i can do it.
No.
I take it back--
I WILL do it.
I just need to quit procrasinating...

Any task in life is easier
if we approach it with the one at a time attitude. ...
To cite a whimsical saying;
'If you chase two rabbits, both of them will escape.'
No one is adequate to do everything all at once.
We have to select what is important,
what is possible,
and begin where we are,
with what we have.
And if we begin
and if we keep going the weight,
the worry,
the doubt,
the depression will begin to lift ....

We can't do everything always,
but we can do something now,
and doing something
will help to lift the weight and lessen the worry,

'The beginning,' said Plato, 'is the most important part.'
--Richard L. Evans, Thoughts for One Hundred Days
i am off to catch one rabbit at a time--
even if i bite off more than i can chew--
if i concentrate on chewing it one bite at a time,
eventually i will be able to swallow--
here is to not choking on my list!

Mostly dead

2011-04-08T12:04:00.001-07:00

I wrote earlier about my poor plants.
It didn't seem like it was an overly cold winter but all it takes is a few chilly days in a row to play havoc on the landscape plants. My plants have always seemed to make it through, but this year was far worse than ever before. My hubby cut everything back once it started to warm up. I was hoping that they would perk up....but up to now I hadn't seen much to give me hope. I walked over the other day to get a closer look. I figured if they were really dead i would rip them out of the ground. Upon closer inspection i saw this

close to the ground there were some signs of new life.
I was thrilled that i was not going to have to take them out.
There was hope....
As i was thinking about them being "mostly dead" it reminded me of a scene in the "Princess Bride" (one of my all time favorite movies)

Miracle Max: [Lifts and drops the arm of the dead Westley] I've seen worse.

Inigo Montoya: He's dead. He can't talk.

Miracle Max: Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much.
It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead.
There's a big difference between mostly dead and all dead.
Mostly dead is slightly alive.
With all dead, well,
with all dead there's usually only one thing you can do.

I love that--sometimes we are so ready to rush to a conclusion about things that we fail to give it the proper time needed for the miracle to happen.
Not just my plants but in my life as well.
We want the instant results.
We lack the patience needed to allow the miracles to take place.

Miracle Max went on to say this:
You rush a miracle man, you get rotten miracles.

I couldn't agree more.
Once again the earth is teaching me a lesson
"Be patient and things will slowly return to normal"

Recieving inspiration in my jammies

2011-04-03T19:33:00.005-07:00

Can I just say I LOVED today?
I sorta feel like i played hookie--
only without any guilt attached to it.
Twice a year we get a free pass to stay home and watch church on TV. I think it should be more of a quarterly thing-- but twice a year is good.
Conference is a blessing--
the talks were inspired
and i can hardly wait to read them again--
there were things said that i know i need to apply to my life.
Things i need to work on--
things i needed to hear and be reminded of.
It was awesome.!

The best part of staying home and watching Conference/church on TV is that I spent the ENTIRE day in my jammies--
Everyone was home today--ALL DAY.
I had all the kids surrounding me.
I loved watching them play with Lego's,
each other and just hanging out.
I loved taking a time out-- not having to run different ways.
Sorta felt like Christmas--
My oldest son and i talked about when the next time conference came in October he would more than likely be in the mission field--no staying in pajama's for him then. Just reminds me of how these moments are fleeting--

Not an April Fools joke

2011-04-01T21:33:00.013-07:00

Today the most cruel of April Fools joke was played on us in Phoenix.The weather man had been telling us for days to expect a unusual high of 98 degrees. We thought for sure it had to be an April Fools joke... Unfortunately it was NOT.! In a cruel weather dichotomy, we were blessed with 100 degrees of HEAT, while those in the northeast were being blessed with... another snowstorm.

(this picture is actually was taken outside of Flagstaff-- but it just goes to show that if i want snow, i only need to drive a few hours) Although I am grateful for the fact that I do not have to shovel sunshine, I felt that 100 degrees on April 1st, was not called for. Sometimes (well more often than naught) I forget that while we live in a warm sunshiny state, other places are still freezing. Today, while i am pulling out my shorts to expose my winter-y, pasty white legs,

those living in the cold are wrapping up as to not expose any skin-- lest it be frozen off.

I can hardly wrap my mind around the fact that while we are having record highs, others are out shoveling snow. I feel guilty wishing that our cooler weather would return--I am not ready for the heat to take over my life. I have enjoyed dressing in layers. I have liked wearing jeans, and socks and tennis shoes. I hate these weird weather days--cool when you get up, and you dress for that only to be TOO warm just a few hours later. Don't get me wrong i love being WARM--just not HOT. I love the sunshine, but not the: burn your skin off, and melt your remains HEAT, that comes with the sun in the summer. I have enjoyed our cooler weather-- WHY MUST IT END???

I know like everything else this too shall end. Just like my life, everything goes in cycles, and if we had perfect weather all the time, what would we have to complain about? I know it will get cooler again before the blaring un-ending summer heat hits us. I guess I am just not ready to be reminded of what is coming around the corner.{{{SIGH}}} Just one more thing i have no control over in my life--but that's OK. I don't want to be a weather god, or mother nature--far too much responsibility--just can not please everyone all the time. Sometimes you can't help but have your parade rained on

Sometimes weather makes for an interesting afternoon

and clouds make for beautiful sunsets

and who doesn't want to be reminded that Rainbows do come out.

To remind us of the HOPE that the lord gives us.

So heat do your best to beat me up and wear me out. I know it will only be a matter of months before it will be cool again and in the meantime while i wait for those wonderful days to come... I will be working on my farmers tan.

Frustrations and a change of heart

2011-03-30T12:44:00.012-07:00

Can I say, "it" is doing IT again.
Just trying to post this entry is making me CRAZY!
Talk about my own frustrations--
COMPUTERS!!!
{{{{AHHHHHH}}}}

I had written the post about the "FUN" we have been having. I posted it--
only to have the format get whacked out--
MANY TIMES!!!
I finally gave up and threw it back into my drafts until i had time to get it worked out. My hubby thought i had taken it off my blog, because i felt bad about writing about him --NAHHH-- just the computer was in non-compliance. It has taken me two days to finally get it up so it looks right. I gave up trying to center it... or highlight, or emphasize any more words. For some reason it seemed to wig out any time i tried to do that.

I am leaving it alone.
It is what it is...
(having the same problem with this post,
anyone else having this problem?)

A few months ago I had interviewed for a promotion at my work (As noted here), i didn't get it.
Guess what?
I am really OK with the fact it did not work out. I like the guy (Mr.X) quite well, who did get the job. Even though he is still learning about different aspects of the job he is doing pretty well. He is teachable and actually listens to those who know what is going on (ie: ME--LOL) It has been fun helping him out. He has strengths where i had weaknesses. He has changed the whole feeling in the office. It is actually a fun place to go to work now.

One day I was talking with Mr.X about his getting the job, and having a husband who has and IS currently going through unemployment, I have an understanding and empathy for what Mr.X went through prior to getting the job. He too had dealt with unemployment. That day I came home and told my husband that i was glad Mr.X got the job over me. He needed it more.!
I really do believe things happen for a reason-- often we can not see the big picture,
and it takes time and the ability to reflect back
to see how things play out.
Things worked out for the best--
I am still figuring out what it means for me?
...but i know in not getting the job,
it will only leave me more opportunities in the end.
We may not always like how things turn out--
we may not understand it at the time,
but in the end we need to remember who is really in charge of our life...
HE has a plan for us--
which we may not know about.
We have to put our trust and faith in his hands.
HE knows what is best.
HE has his timing.
HE is refining us,
molding us,
and if we let him,
HE can and will make us into more than we could ever hope to be.
It is hard being patient and waiting on HIS timing.
I have to remind myself of these truths.
I need to work on my faith.
I need to work on my patience.
I need to remember that things happen for a reason,
and as much as I would like to think
I am in control of my life--
I'm NOT.
What can I say?
I am just a work in progress.

“All of us are guinea pigs
in the laboratory of God.
Humanity is just a work in progress.”
Tennessee Williams

When will this FUN end?

2011-03-28T17:51:00.022-07:00

Dont'cha just love ADVERSITY?
(said with a slight note of sarcasm, well maybe not slight!?)
Or how about those trials/tribulations
that you know will eventually end,
but you keep waiting for that day to come....

LIFE...
{{{{SIGH}}}}
in all it wonder,
frustration,
happiness,
and pain
can be exhausting some days.

I realize that it takes the bitter,
to appreciate the sweet,
and without the bad,
we could not truly enjoy the good--
but i think i have had my fair share of the bitter lately--
not that things couldn't always be worse--
but they certainly could be better!?
We are ready for better.

We are getting really good at the
"hurry up and wait game"...
only to be disappointed...
AGAIN.
Nothing like,
"always the bridesmaid...
never the bride"--
or "second place...
also known as first loser",
or "close but no cigar".
If it is a cliche about ALMOST getting what you want,
it fits our situation.!

Poor hubby got another one of those calls today...
He was the guy. (or he was supposed to be)
His/our waiting was to be over...
but it didn't exactly work out that way--
Feeling frustrated,
mad
and disappointed
he went to drown his sorrows by watching Jeopardy--
and low and behold there was some clown on the TV instead--(some people refer to him as the president)
My poor hubby.
He had all he could take--
if you can't watch Jeopardy and have no desire to listen to the president ramble on, the next best thing he could do was to buy two tacos from Jack in the Box and drown his sorrows in some fake meat, cheese and a healthy(?) dose of grease, which he did, and then promptly came home and ate them while watching Leave it to Beaver.

It is good to be reminded of
calmer,
simpler,
happier times....
All of which we hope will return to our home--
sooner than later, we hope--
ENOUGH OF THIS FUN ALREADY!

This scripture has brought me some peace...
especially this time of year.

These things I have spoken unto you,
that in me ye might have PEACE.
In the world ye shall have TRIBULATION:
but be of GOOD CHEER;
I have overcome the world.

St John 16:33

My prayer is that we can all find peace in our tribulations
and that we can remember the things we are blessed with,
and that we can remember it is only momentary
(even if it feels like those moments go on and on....)

Thoughts on SPRING

2011-03-21T21:43:00.005-07:00

well it is official. Spring Break is over... that was the rude awakening that i was hit with this morning. I had gotten spoiled with the opportunity to sleep in last week. I took FULL advantage of each and every opportunity to ease into the day. I think while i was sleeping in, the sun decided to start popping up earlier... because when i woke up today (at my normal early time) there it was, as if saying to me "get up you lump of lard". Well, maybe the sun doesn't use that kind of language-- (that was more of me willing myself to get out of bed.) Instead the sun was reaching out as if telling me to enjoy the early morning sunrise because it will be coming earlier and earlier, and with that the HEAT! I am not ready for that-- I figured i was done with layering my clothes, wearing my sweatshirt and even socks, so you can imagine my surprise when i opened up the door to walk out and turned back around to grab my sweatshirt. What a pleasant surprise--staving off the heat for one more day. It was overcast and ended up raining for a large portion of the day--it was BEAUTIFUL--as if it was washing away the dirt of winter and freshening the earth in preparation of spring. (I almost felt guilty enjoying the rain since my cousin and her family were down here from Oregon to enjoy our sunshine and warmth)

I noticed my trees which had been dormant for the winter starting to spring new blossoms.

It was a rough winter on my plants--many were killed off with a few nights of below freezing temps--imagine my surprise when i saw the white flowers popping up on my pile of sticks that i had left in the ground. Just when i was about to give up on that plant it found a way to muster up some life--I guess that is what spring is about--not giving up. Transition. Change. Becoming NEW. So with 9 weeks left of school we are in the final stretch--Changes will be coming--Transitions. Not sure i am ready for all of them. I guess when i start to feel overwhelmed I need to remember to look to the sunrise which makes getting up easier, and those plants and flowers that refused to give up. Somewhere along the way I can muster up the strength to bloom amidst adversity.

Ramblings at two in the morning

2011-03-18T01:31:00.003-07:00

Don'tcha hate when you have been tired for most of the evening but not enough to sleep? It's not even that my mind is moving a mile a minute--cuz it's not. It is vacation and my body is freaking out at the knowledge that i can sleep in--and i have been. It has been so nice--even little man has slept in--i mean REALLY slept in. Why must school start back up next week? Actually I should not be complaining because we are in the home stretch from here on out--in fact graduation for number two child is but a short nine weeks away--AHHHHH. So hard to believe--
Note to self:
Need to schedule senior pictures
son needs haircut prior to them being taken
Need to buy cap and gown
Need to pinpoint son on how he wants his announcements to look so i can start creating the masterpieces

I have determined tonight that i am NOT a good a home movie watcher--and when i say home movie it is not about HOME movies--those little gems of entertainment from when your children were little.--NO. I am actually talking about movies that were once in the theater that are now available to be watched in the comfort of your home. I find it just takes far more attention than i can give when i am at home. I loved the movie we were watching tonight when i saw it in the theater, but while watching it at home i couldn't have told you anything about it. I am just far too distracted. Too many other things that draw my attention away. I had no popcorn to keep me focused and in-line. Well maybe not, but i do love popcorn and soda when i am in the theater--it is after all in my opinion part of the whole movie watching experience. I thought about turning down the lights to give more of the theater effect in the room--but decided against in for fear i would fall asleep. I guess i just should have done it--at least now i would have a few hours of sleep under my belt.

So now here i am. Hot and cold all at the same time. 98% of me is plenty warm--overly warm--but my feet....my feet are chilled and i think that is why i am awake. I should put on socks but then i know i will be even warmer...OIE veeeh. not to mention that my heels are crusty and snagging on the sheets--I need to get a good pedi....Did I mention the headache? Or the slightly stuffed nose? Not stuffed enough to warrant drugs, but enough to bug me. Allergy season here we come. Maybe i should break down and take something for the headache...or not. Instead i will sit here and watch House--he is sure to put me to sleep--and give me nightmares in the process...

March Mantel or Madness?

2011-03-17T05:38:00.020-07:00

I am here to educate, enlighten and basically share facts about things that i previously had no clue about...

Did you know…

Every year on March 17, people celebrate a holiday of which the history has been lost. Many people throughout the world celebrate this holiday decked out in green, trying not to get pinched, and looking for a leprechaun hoarding a pot of gold. In all actuality, this holiday serves a greater purpose of recognizing a man who faced a lifetime of troubles, trying to help people for the greater good.

The original history of Saint Patrick’s Day goes back over a thousand years to Ireland. The holiday was originally celebrated as a religious feast to commemorate the death of Saint Patrick. Today, many don’t even know who Saint Patrick is. Patrick also was one of the first in the church to speak of women fondly as human beings,

and he thus became a saint of “the downtrodden and excluded.”

To me the real interesting part about St. Patrick is that he wasn't really from Ireland--nope--he was English. So I guess that's why it's OK for all of us non-Irish people to celebrate this day. Know what else? They didn't really eat corned beef--they were pork people. Only when the Americans got a hold of this holiday did we change things up...

I have never actually decorated for St. Patricks day,
I have always honored the food tradition though.
We always know what we are going to eat on March 17th,

but this year i was wanting a change.
Why not decorate a mantel for the occasion?
...only problem is

you have to have mantel,
and since we are a fireplace free house
i had to settle on a small shelf instead.

I could have gone small and simple,
starting with one or two things

but why?
WHY go small and simple?
It just isn't my nature.
My mantra is
"go big or go home"
or in other words
"if one is good, ten are better."

Hard to believe, but somewhere among this mess
I found my creative, crafting MOJO.

It would have been nice to have actually worked in my office instead of the kitchen table,
but that room is even worse off.
At least when i work at the kitchen table,
i know that at one point or another
it will get cleaned up and put away

Since i have no IRISH blood (that i know of)
i did not want my mantel to scream that--

instead i wanted to focus on the LUCK part of the holiday.
To start off my creative juices i was feeling "LUCKY".

I knew i wanted to start with that word,
and have that be the center piece of my shelf.

This is what I came up with.

I think it turned out pretty cute
They were some plain old letters that i bought from JoAnns...

(I sat on the floor trying out different combinations until I found the one i liked)
I painted them all black and then mod podged on the paper
and trimmed and sanded them.
I intended it to be a four leaf clover on the "L",
and i think it turned out more like a green flower...
Cest' la vie--
(can you use a french phrase when talking about an Irish holiday?)

Originally i had chosen another wooden "U" but i fell in love with this one.
I thought it had a horse shoe like shape--
only problem with leaving it black (as to mimic a horse shoe) was that it sort of got lost with everything else on the shelf until I put the frame behind it
(I had planned on printing something to put in the frame,
but we ran out of ink...turned out i liked it blank better)
The cardboard made it pop out--
I LOVED IT

My next creative genius
(honk, honk....yes that is me, tooting my own horn)
came when i saw these plain paper mache' hearts around Valentines Day.
For a buck each I knew i couldn't go wrong.
A little green paint and various buttons from my vast stash
and i came up with this cute (if i say so myself) topiary.
I finished it off by putting it in a pot of gold
And what is a pot of gold
if there is not a leprechaun to protect it?
I thought he was pretty cute,
and it is only appropriate
that he sat on a block that said blessed.
(the block is another addition to my shelf that i can change monthly
--flip to the word that fits best)
Simple candles needed to be jazzed up so i wrapped them in paper, tied them off with white burlap and made some shamrocks out of my heart punch and some more buttons out of my stash--WA--LAah

I then transformed a frame from a Thrift store in to this cute little sign.
Just some shamrock paper and cut letters from my Cricut
(thank goodness my daughter can work that since i still have never really played with it)

I finished off the shelf by hanging the
four leaf clover that i had made earlier

add a little shamrock tree to the side

and TA-DA

I love the way it all turned out.
Just like i had envisioned it.

more than anything else this shelf really reminds me that
i am LUCKY
more than a pot of gold
i have been blessed with these wonderful gems in my life

having them reminds me daily
that i am lucky
that i am blessed
and any gold that i might have....
will be spent by them

whip something up

2011-03-16T20:54:00.009-07:00

I am growing up...
hard to believe that after 42 years
(i think that is how old I am?)
I am still willing to try new things
that i am not soooo set in my ways
and that i am willing to step outside of the box.

When it comes to food

i think i am pretty open to trying new things-
at least that is what i think until i watch some of these food shows and then i think, well, maybe I'm not.They eat some shall we say exotic (ie: Nasty) stuff on some of these shows. Then there are the overeating shows that just gross me out. Whatever the case, I might not be willing to eat the "exotic" stuff--not that i have many opportunities but I am willing to eat things that were previously on my "not quite my favorite list". Not that this list was very long.

So what was on this list

that previously i would not eat, that now i do?

Cabbage--love it on tacos and a good coleslaw. This does not mean that i love all coleslaw--just some. I love cooked cabbage and love it sauteed in butter with onions. Honestly can you go wrong with anything cooked in butter?

I think not.

Brussel Sprouts--or when i was little i would refer to them as mini cabbages. My oldest brother would request them for his birthday dinner every year--I think he didn't like them so much as he just wanted to torment us by having to eat them. Somewhere along the line my family has adopted their like for this little vegetable and often it can be found on our table for Sunday dinner. Still not my favorite food and i probably won't request it, but i don't mind it.

With me growing up and eating brussel sprouts this has caused my husband to do the same...only with asparagus. Previously, just the mention of this pencil shaped vegetable would send him into a gag reflux.(i am serious when i speak about the gagging--even the thought or smell and he would be gagging--he swore he would NEVER eat it EVER!!!) I loved the vegetable so subsequently it made its way into our fridge and on the table until one day he actually ate it(after much persuasion and a few bribes) and he liked it--now he buys it, and prepares it.

The last veggie wasn't so much a dislike as it was more of an indifferent feeling toward it. Cauliflower. I found i liked it made this way but honestly it was loaded with a ton of calories so it has failed to make its way back to our table. Tonight though, my husband made a lighter version that was equally tasty with what he topped it with. He panned fried it briefly with some fresh garlic and then steamed it. Instead of potatoes as the base he whipped the cauliflower with a little butter and milk in the blender. It was great--so much lighter and not starchy like potatoes.

So this is what dinner was.
Doesn't it look pretty.

It starts with a scoop of whipped cauliflower. It was a nice creamy contrast to the sweet chunky fresh tomato sauce--and then you've got the stalks of asparagus to add a crunchy bite with the tender pan fried chicken.

So delish

So glad my husband is willing to whip up dinner for me.

I am glad that he has us try new and different things

I am glad that he keeps me

fat and happy.

well, maybe not the fat part,

but the HAPPY.

By the way--the item still on my list
LIVER--
doesn't matter how old i get,
or grown up and open minded i feel....
I am just not going there any time soon

Tragedy makes us reflect

2011-03-11T10:49:00.000-07:00

Why is it that it takes something TERRIBLE to make me step back and realize how truly blessed I am? Has it really been 7 years since i woke just after Christmas to see the devastation that took place in Indonesia? Bad things are not supposed to happen around Christmas. While we were celebrating and spending time with family for the holidays, others across the world were looking for their loved ones amongst the ruble and debris of an earthquake and subsequent Tsunami. I remember being paralyzed for days after, sitting in awe as i watched the images play out on TV. How could something so horrible have happened? Then slowly we resumed our "normal" lives and went about our business as usual. My life went on and only on occasion did i give this tragedy a second thought. It was only today when i started thinking about it again that i can hardly believe that it was that long ago.

Once again while i was sleeping safe and sound in my home, across the world those in Japan were living out their worst nightmares. It is not something that they will just be able to wake up from either. It will be on going for months/years. It was something that no one had any control over...I think that is when you feel so small in this world, to realize we have very little control of what happens in our lives. I have been thinking about those families that sent missionaries over to Japan. What faith to send your child half way around the world. All you can do is pray that they will be safe...and they have been. What a blessing. I only hope that while they are there that they will be able to console the weak and broken.That they can give the aid to those who need it since we can't. It will be many many years of healing for the Japanese. Long after it is no longer in the news, long after it has been placed in the history books as the horrific event that it is, they will still be dealing with it. I need to remember to be thankful for my blessings, for my safety. And i need to remember after it is no longer the headline news story that those in Japan,they will still need my prayers.

Shamrocks

2011-03-07T21:31:00.001-07:00

Nothing screams St.Patricks Day more than the Shamrock.

(hello cute beaded shamrock in the $1 frame from Michaels)
this one was made from everything i had on hand--
i think it needs a stem though
gotta love leftovers for craft projects and a $1 frame from DI

I remember as a kid sitting in my yard and picking through a pile shamrocks looking for the elusive four leaf clover...and ya know what? I actually have not only found one, but two, four leaf clovers in my life time. Now does that mean I am twice as LUCKY? Probably not--I think it just means i am more persistent when i am on a quest to find something. If i can't find what i want, i find something else to make it work. That was what i had to do when making my wreath. I knew i wanted a four leaf clover--i thought it represented LUCK better--so off i went in search of some hearts that i could put together to make my wreath. Guess what? Styrofoam hearts were next to impossible to find before or after Valentines day, so i had to get creative.
I started out with a Styrofoam circle

and traced on some hearts till i got a shape that i liked.
I then took a handy dandy serrated knife to cut it out
(please don't tell the hubby that i used his Henkle to do this)
Then I used the part of the Styrofoam that i had cut off
to sand the edges and smooth them.
(It worked really well, but man did it make a mess)
Styrofoam dust is almost as bad as glitter--it sticks to everything and goes everywhere. If i ever do it again i think it will become an outside project. Then my OCD kicked in and i decided I needed to paint it (knowing that I probably wouldn't even see it when it was covered) but doesn't it look great?
Very Shamrock-ie I say...
Then much like i had done on my valentine wreath I cut out green felt to cover my Styrofoam with. I used a flower die that had a heart/shamrock like look when folded

(Originally i tri-folded the felt
but it made it too bulky so i went with a quarter fold instead)
I then started filling it in.
(This picture was when i was still tri-folding it--like i said it turned out too bulky this way)

not rocket science here. Just stick it with a pin and fill it in.

(notice the bus seat? yes, i was crafting on the job)

I actually ended up taking it apart and re-doing it because it too full the first time. That and the fact that it was sitting out and my husband was a bit aggressive with petting/fluffing my shamrock that he actually broke off one of the arms--thank goodness for glue.

I think it turned out pretty cute. I probably should have done a three leaf clover because aesthetically i think it would have looked better--but NOOOO--had to be a four leaf clover because it represented LUCK and i thought about how common a three leaf clovers are, almost weed like in some places, and then i read this little fact about good ol' St. Patty

Legend has it that the shamrock was used to represent the Holy Trinity by St. Patrick. By doing this he could show people how the church was connected. St. Patrick used this to symbolize how the
Father, Son, and Holy Spirit
can be separate, but also part of the same entity.

Knowing this now,
I LOVE three leaf clovers.
It helps me stop and remember where my LUCK comes from
and to be thankful for my blessings

and of course the aesthetics and all....

50 ODD things about ME?!

2011-03-06T20:57:00.000-07:00

Found this buried in my drafts from a few years ago--
figured i might as well post it--feel free to cut and past and fill it out on your blog--i think some of the questions were fun

1. Do you like blue cheese?
Blue, white, yellow--i don't discriminate--I am an equal opportunity cheese consumer

2. Have you ever smoked heroin?
The only smoking i have ever had come out of my body, is from my ears, when i am mad.

3. Do you own a gun?
Does Nerf count? I kinda have some issues with guns in the home....

4. What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic?
Extra lime

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?
Only OB/GYN--the whole bodily function thing makes me nervous....

6. What do you think of hot dogs?
Costco hot dogs and Ted's, but they need Deli mustard,onions and sauerkraut anything else is just wrong

7. Favorite Christmas song?
Mary's Lullaby, Away in a manger, What child is this...

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
Nothing....Water I guess or a COKE if i have a headache...I know mom, it is terrible for me but it does help

9. Can you do push ups?
I am more proficient at the push downs--haven't tried the push ups in years--but i did win the Presidential Fitness award in Elementary school

10. What's your favorite piece of jewelry?
I don't wear much but I love my banglie bracelets

11. Favorite hobby?
That i actually do....HMMM I guess scrap booking, although i do love to finish a fun upholstery project

12. Do you have A.D.D.?
Is that like O.C.D.? I prefer the title of multi tasker

13. What's one trait that you hate about yourself?
I will let you know tomorrow--PROCRASTINATION!

14.If you had to give up one of your senses, what would it be?
I would give up being able to smell. Although taste is directly related to smell and i really like food--so maybe hear--I guess i am so thankful for all of my senses and glad this is just a rhetorical question

15. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment.
I am sitting in the jury room at superior court--
1.I hate waiting
2.Why do they think burping on a movie is funny
3. Kinda cold and hungry
I guess that is really four but i think cold and hungry go together

16.Name 4 drinks you regularly drink?
Water, Pepsi(otherwise known as the nectar of the gods) Diet Coke with Lime--Diet cherry limeade from Sonic

17. Current worry right now?
How my youngest is going to like and adjust to his new teacher

18. Current hate right now?
dirty house/laundry/mopping floors but i hate these things all the time

19.Favorite season?
--I love fall--I love the smell of the leaves and the wonderful colors that they trees turn. I miss it alot since we don't actually have fall in AZ

20. How did you bring in the New Years?
With friends and their kids--pigging out,playing games and doing a puzzles and the guys play games

21. Like to go?
Is this an opened ended question--like make up your own ending or is like take the time to "GO"--often i find i am to busy to stop and take the time to "GO"--I wish i could have others "go" for me

22.Nail polish?
Only on my toes--love the dark blue/reds in the winter, pinks in the spring and an orange red in the fall

23. Do you own your own slippers?
Yes.I used to love those with the funny animals and such--now i just like warm and comfy ones that i can drive in if needed.

24. What color shirt are you wearing?
A green one to match my eyes--after all the years of my mom trying to convince me to wear green it finally worked

25. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets?
NO--I am a cotton girl all the way--I just gave away my satin sheets and they were practically brand new--don't like the slip sliding feeling or the snaggy feeling when your heels are rough

26. Can you whistle?
Yes,only in...but not very effectively.

27. Favorite color?
I love it all in various shades--color makes me happy

28. Would you be a pirate?
ARGHHHH yes matey---but i think my integrity would be and issue to the whole robbing and pillaging thing---

29. What songs do you sing in the shower?
Not a big shower singer--but get me in the car and watch out!

30. If you could pick your name what would it have been?
hmmmm--this is a deep question--I think my name fits me--leigh ann, but not just leigh

31.Bed sheets as a kid
--I had holly hobby and then some pretty yellow with tiny little multicolored buds--still like those sheets (yes i still have one)

32. What's in your pocket right now?
a coupon to Lowes--coins and beads. What can I say? I live a random life

33. Last thing that made you laugh?
watching my husband play the WII

34. Worst injury you've ever had?
When i rubbed off all the skin on my shins knee boarding right before graduation

35. Do you love where you live?
Although it is hot in the summer you don't have to shovel sunshine and if you want the snow you only have to drive a few hours to find it. I do miss the trees from back east but have learned to appreciate the beauty that is found in the desert

36. How many TV's do you have in your house?
I think six or so

37. Who is your loudest friend?
HMMMMM--I think Sheli but actually she is my sis-in-law. I think i am probably louder than her at times though

38. How many pets do you have?
one really spoiled dog

39. Does someone have a crush on you?
It is my anniversary--so i hope my husband

40. What is your favorite book?
I go between the mindless dribble and murder mystery. I also love a good coffee table book and love History books

41. What is your favorite candy?
Heath Bar or Peanut M&M's--makes me feel like i am making a healthy choice since nuts are good for you

42. Favorite Sports Team?
the ones my children are on--although i do have teams i prefer to drive and watch over others--just a perk of my job

43. What were you doing 12 AM last night?
Sleeping--what can i say? I am getting old

44. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up?
"Crap! I have to get up and go to work...again"

45. Worst habit?
Cursing and procrastination, but i try not to make that a habit

46. Do you play an instrument?
Does the radio count? I can play the first two lines of "My country tis of thee" on the piano--maybe one day i will figure it out

47. How long does it take you to get to work?
About 7 minutes or less--depends if i cut through the parking lot when i don't get a left turn arrow in the morning

48. Plans for the weekend?
work (story of my life) Party with the friends for New Years--always tons to eat and lots of laughs and a good time--bummer it only happens once a year

49. If you could eat anything in the world right this second what would it be?
Panna Cotta! Seriously love that stuff. Just hook up an IV with that in it and i will die a happy person

50. Do you like the person who sent this to you?
Since there are very few people that i dislike the odds are YES--only wish i could remember who actually sent it to me

When good art goes WRONG

2011-02-22T22:27:00.006-07:00

I have been wanting to post these picture for awhile.
I have been hanging onto them for the perfect day.
I figured the time had come.

After all it is February
--the month of LUV.
LUV...LUV...LUV
What screams love more than a cute cherub.

I love how they strategically placed his drape as to be a modest cherub. After all you don't want a porno cherub hanging in the house. Then this also bears the question: "Are they male? Female? Or are cherubs a sexual?" Inquiring minds want to know---or, at least i do now that i am writing this.

Now, I don't really think that this is a really cute cherub. I recently saw this on a lovely (tongue in cheek) piece of art work. I had to get real close to the picture to actually see what it was. I was intrigued. Oh the lovely artwork it was...The cherub was dimensional, as to stand out.

Then you had these lovely working,
yes, I said WORKING lights in the picture

I mean it is not everyday that your wall art also double as a night light.
Or maybe,
it was MOOD lighting.
After all, a cherub with mood lighting?
Who wouldn't be in the mood with this lovely piece of ART
(Have you noticed that i continue to say lovely?
I think i need to pull out the thesaurus,
and yes, i am using that word lovely loosely)
hanging above their couch.
Well there it is folks. That little blob in the middle--on the top of the fountain is the dimensional cherub. Why? Oh WhY, did i not find the money in my purse to pick up this lovely (there is the word again) maybe i should say interesting art piece....well, we will just leave it at that.

Scary part is...someone did buy it.
Personally, I am hoping this was a one of a kind.

NEVER to be duplicated again
just too much blue for me.....

My charmer

2011-02-17T19:12:00.002-07:00

My fourth child has always been a charmer.

Maybe it is the dimples on his cheek and his BEE-UTE-IFUL blue/green eyes
This has always been one of my most favorite pictures of this punk.
Perhaps it is his fun personality,

or his guns he likes to show off

(how many boys do you know that can pull off pink sequence?)
Or his ability to rock the "gangsta' look"

He loves little kids--including his own brother

Today found me with a horrible headache after a long day at work. I came in and crashed on the couch. My son had just started a movie on Netflix--TRON--not exactly what i had in mind to decompress to. I looked around the room and it looked like a bomb had gone off. Seeing my son just vegging there I started a conversation with him, and this is how it went

Me: have you done anything around the house today?
(knowing full well that NOTHING had been done)

Son: "mommy, have i told you how much i love you"
(batting his long eyelashes and flashing me a grin)

me:( Ignoring his attempt to sway me)
"Like i asked before. Have you done anything today?"

Son: "But you are the best mommy,

I L--OOOO--VVV--EEE YOUUUUU."
(said in the most condescending,

sickening sweet voice

a 14 year old boy could muster up)

Me: "It would be nice if you would do something to show me that you love me"
(me, thinking the "showing" would involve a chore of some kind)

Son: (Reaches over and gives me a KISS???)
"That is showing you, or would you prefer a hug instead?"

(this coming from my child who runs the other direction when i try to elicit a hug)

I caved

--melted as it were.

--gave in, or better yet gave up.

If he is gonna to go to that extreme to get out of doing a job who am i to argue?

And quite honestly i just didn't have it in me anyway.

Who knew that under those beautiful eyes,
dimples, and the hat held a devious mastermind.

Keeping my kids on their toes

2011-02-14T21:03:00.008-07:00

Since today is February 14Th, Valentines Day, perhaps I should start out this blog entry by wishing you and those you love a happy day.
But i won't.
I am not a fan, big or otherwise of this Hallmark Holiday.
I am the bah humbug, scrooge of Valentines day.
It is not that I was ever spurned on the Holiday, or that those I love didn't show me proper appreciation on that particular day. It is actually the opposite. My attitude has always been that if you need a specific day/holiday to remind you to show your love, is it really real? I have seen husbands and wives upset over this day because they felt slighted by their love. I have single friends that feel this is a day to remind them that they are single. So I have boycotted this overpriced, over commercialized, heart and flower day for many years.

Early on in my relationship with the hubsters we agreed NOT to do anything on this particular date--instead opting for the random acts of love/thoughtfulness throughout the year. He was NOT to buy me overpriced flowers on Valentines--instead choosing to buy them randomly at various times during the year, "just because". This has worked for us. We save a ton of money and don't feel like we have been scalped by those taking financial advantage of this particular day. We also take each other out for a bite to eat "just because"--instead of fighting for reservations at a particular restaurant on a "holiday". We leave all that stuff up to the real romantics--which i am decidedly NOT one. I am just to pragmatic...too low maintenance to allow a holiday to get my knickers in a wad over how I am shown that I am loved on that one particular day. In my mind it is the 364 days prior that really count.

Now that i have told you how i really feel about this day, let me get to the real reason behind this blog post.

MY CHILDREN.

Yes, this is about my children and their knowledge of how I view this particular day. In some ways I fear have doomed them! What if they find and marry someone who has a different belief about the day? Someone who views this day as important? I can see some of them being in the proverbial doghouse for my belief...the belief they have been raised with. My children know about my feelings about this particular day. In their mind i have become
"PREDICTABLE".
Being their mom and having lived with me ALL their lives they think they know what makes me tick. You can imagine their surprise when i actually broke down and decorated for this loathed holiday.

It wasn't just one child that i had wondering what i was doing,
It was all of them.
Or at least the four that can actually verbalize their shock and awe.
As i was making this cute wreath on night my oldest son asked what I was making. (I had made the LOVE blocks earlier with my girlfriend and she had a cute wreath like this hanging up as well, and of course i needed one to complete my look)
I told him. He then asked if i felt OK. "Why yes" I responded. "Why do you ask?" "Well Mom. I know you HATE Valentines day and am wondering WHY you are making a wreath for it?" I just sort of laughed it off.

Then my oldest daughter made the comment to my husband that she thought i was having a mid life crisis? He asked her why? She responded "Because Mom is decorating for Valentines Day" We had a pretty good laugh about that. When i asked her about it she just shook her head. She just doesn't get it. Just when they thought they knew me and what made me tick.

I totally have thrown my children for a loop

--I have them off guard wondering?

What they don't get is that i needed a creative outlet
and despite my dislike for the holiday, i do love to decorate.

I don't dislike the idea of LOVE

--I love LOVE.
(especially when it turns out as cute as this covered in old buttons)

LOVE is what makes the world go round.
LOVE is important.

We all need to know we are loved.
--maybe that is why I DON'T NEED Valentines Day.
I know I am loved.
I am secure in that knowledge.With that being said, it doesn't hurt to be reminded to show your love. I guess maybe Valentines day is a good thing for some...those that need the reminder. For me I will be content to just put up the cute decorations and hope that it rubs off on those around me.

I do love them

and more than anything
i LOVE keeping them on their toes.
P.S. It was a good thing that i took pictures of my shelf when i did, because I woke up the next day to find it all over the couch--somehow one of my brackets on my shelf came loose--don't ya just LOVE when things break :)

Note to GOD

2011-02-11T12:27:00.004-07:00

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thought i would drop you a note in case you have been too busy to hear me lately. I have always found a bit of irony when teams sit down and pray before a game that they will win. What if the other team is praying for the same thing as well? Does it come down to who God loves best?--cuz i have always been taught that you love all of your children. Do you have favorites?--or do you base your answer to the prayer on who is being the most obedient to your commandments at the time? I have found myself praying the prayer of success the last few days...Not so much a prayer against the opponent...but a prayer for strength, and the desire to win. That my son can do his best. It is hard being the mom. Watching your child work so hard at their goals... You want your kids to succeed and to do their best. Heavenly Father, I am sure you are torn with the same emotions. Does it come down to your will or the preparation prior to the event? I find that those simple prayers I have uttered in my sons behalf are more for me--calming my nerves that I will be OK with the outcome--but Heavenly Father, if it is YOUR will, can you please let him WIN? We need a win in our lives these days.
I would really appreciate any help you can give us/me in this matter.
Thanks for listening.
Love,
Your most grateful daughter

P.S. Not to be greedy and want all of your help and blessings but if you could please see a way for my hubby to find a job i would REALLY LOVE that

Re-Entry

2011-02-07T20:09:00.008-07:00

re·entry or re-entry re-en′try (rē en′trē)
noun pl. reentries -·tries
1. a reentering; specif., a coming back, as of a space vehicle, into the earth's atmosphere, the act of entering again
2. a second or repeated entry; the act of going back to a prior location

Reach for the moon,

'cause even if you miss

you land among the stars

So today i felt like i was coming in from outer-space. I have been orbiting around my life and it is time to make some changes--a re-entry of sort into my life and the direction i want it to go. Who knows i might crash and burn but then again experience counts for something..Right?

For a number of years I have been toying with the idea of returning to school and getting a nursing degree. When i finally had this life changing epiphany it was after my last baby was born. It had only taken me thirty two years to figure out what i wanted to be when i grew up. Then life sorta got in the way. My goal was to get my butt back into school when little man turned one (he is now nine). That was about the time when we were finding out there were some issues with him. He became my full time job between working part time, remodeling a kitchen, being a mom and dealing with four other children. The timing just wasn't right. Goals were postponed and life got busy. Having five kids/teenagers has the tendency to do that. I figured i would go back when he got into school. Time just kept marching on and it didn't happen. I found myself on auto pilot dealing with the daily needs. It is hard to get back into school when you have been out for so long.

Today found me picking up my oldest from college. She has recently decided that she wants to go into nursing. That has become a happy coincidence for me. In trying to move her in the right direction it has gotten me thinking. There was a meeting that she/I needed to attend to get more information about the nursing program. We have been throwing around the idea of when to go--and today was the day. It was fun walking the campus with the daughter. It certainly had changed a TON since i walked it 20+ years ago. Thank goodness i had my own personal tour guide to show me the way. We went to the meeting which was great. I found out that my math that I took 20+ years ago was still applicable and I could count it--YIPEE.

After the meeting we went off to the advisory office to get my student #. We spoke with the advisor and then we were off to the the testing center. After all these years I had actually never taken the entrance tests to see what i was capable of. We asked how long the test would take and were told it would take a few hours. I decided to go ahead and give it a whirl. Why not? I had the afternoon off. My daughter bid me farewell and I told her i would call her when i was done.

First lets just say when I started on this college road many years ago we didn't have things like, "the Internet". We had barely gotten our first computer and lets be honest, it really was more like a glorified (albeit expensive) word processor. When you did a research paper you actually had to do research...in a library. Things have changed just a bit since then. The test i was taking today was on the computer--and i will be honest in saying that i missed coloring in the little circles--there is something satisfying and cathartic about staying in the lines and seeing the pattern the little circles would make. --Let me divert here for a moment. When I would have to take those standardized tests in Junior High there would come a point where i would get bored, and knowing that those tests didn't really count, i would fill in the dots randomly to make pictures. Somehow i was a pretty good {{guesser}} because i seemed to do well enough even with my questionable strategies. Seeing how this was on the computer today and there were no dots or pictures to distract me it had my full attention. I couldn't even go back and re-check my answers. Once i hit "accept" that was it. It was out into cyber space. I found that i actually had to really concentrate and read some of the things out loud to completely comprehend what i was reading. I have gotten into the habit of skim reading things over the years and I didn't think that would work here. I actually took the time and cared about this test. I felt pretty good about it when all was said and done.

Then came the math portion. I thought how hard can it be--I was WRONG. It is not like getting back on a bike--I had forgotten more than i remembered. I ask you...What is the point of mixing the alphabet and numbers? Who's idea was that? I know it used to make sense but as i started taking the test I knew it was not going to be pretty. Maybe i should have reviewed a bit before i sat down to attempt this. What happened to adding and subtracting? Maybe even throw in some multiplication and division--but NO. Instead they tortured me with....I pretty much could not remember much of anything. Can we say "Houston,we have a problem." I know I did well on the word problems--because that is the kind of math i do these days. Or if they had asked me how much tax is on a $20. item--or perhaps how much it would cost if it was 65% off. I like those kind of math problems. I am good at those kinds of math problems--but alas they wanted me to figure out what these little letters meant and my brain just was not having it. I could not pull it from the archives to remember for anything--so i pretty much resorted to hitting the button that was the equivalent of "I am clueless". It was either that or have my brain explode.

When i finished the test i came out. The girl at the desk asked me how I did. "Horrible on the math" I responded, all the while thinking "crash and burn". She proceeded to tell me that was what most people said and usually they did fine. I told her that was not my case--I knew i had blown it--burned up on re-entry. Now please remember that i have already taken college algebra and passed it when i tell you my grade...

I got a 17.
Yes, you read that correct.
A 17.
Now that is not a 17 out of 20.
That would mean it was a good grade-

instead it is a 17 out of 100!
Can you say PAH-Thet-ICK

(that is pathetic only exaggerated a bit more)

All i could do is laugh. She told me that i would need to take Basic Arithmetic--MAT081. Yeah?? I don't think so. I can retake the test and if i need to take more math i will do some refresher problems before i attempt that again. English and Reading turned out MUCH better. I had test scores i was proud of--one i could hold my head up high on. I actually tested out of reading and my sentence skills I scored 114/120. Not so bad. She told me that i could actually take HONORS English.
Me in HONORS?
What is the point of that?
I soon learned that if you take honors you can actually get money for that class--
HMMMM.... something to think about.
Might actually make the work worth it.

I can't begin to tell you how excited i am about this big step i took today. I know i have a long road in front of me but the fact I actually have started the process thrills me. I might crash and burn on my re-entry, but i hope that my lifes experience will play in my favor. When i thought about how long this path will take me, it sorta made me discouraged at how old i will be when i finally finish. But guess what?--I will be that age whether i try to do this or not...so what do i have to lose?

“It is never easy to keep reaching for dreams.

Strength and courage can sometimes be lonely friends.

But those who do reach the stars,

walk in stardust.”

What makes my heart weak

2011-02-01T19:56:00.004-07:00

Please bear with me while i get a bit mushy--

if you know me at all you know this is not normal for me

but seeing how it is February and all...

I don't tell or show my hubby near enough that i LOVE him...
but I do.
Sometimes we get so busy with life that we just go on auto pilot and take each other for granted.

We know each other so well and what makes each other tick.

We are alike in so many ways and yet so different
He makes me crazy sometimes--

He is HOT!

I mean that in the most literal sense of the word--he is like sleeping next to my own personal heating pad--which most days is just too HOT for me especially when we live in AZ.
He likes to sing random songs to me (sometimes)
He loves sports--all sports.
He loves to swing--golf clubs that is.
He likes to ponder before he speaks
He LOVES sushi and eating with chopsticks
He is quite the accomplished cook and has managed to keep me FAT and Happy--
but when he surprised me today and cleaned our room,
and put fresh sheets on the bed, and hung up my pile of skirts.
Never has my heart pittered pattered more for this man

After 23 years of marriage he can still manage to surprise me.
Can i just say this is far better than a box of chocolates
or a vase of flowers!

other peoples creative-ness

2011-01-30T23:02:00.005-07:00

Here it is Late on Sunday night.Unfortunately Monday morning at work is just looming around the corner. A good long nap rejuvenated me today. Can I just say I love early church so I can nap in the afternoon? I really should be in bed but instead i am up watching a marathon of Criminal Minds and checking out random blogs. Watching Criminal Minds alone, late at night really isn't the smartest thing but it just seemed to suck me in. Luckily the cute blogs i have been looking only has me half concentrating on Criminal Minds. I am in AWE at what people can accomplish--the creativity that is out there is

AH-MAZE-ING.

How about this lady who stenciled her ceiling???

I loved it. It sorta made me feel like an underachiever? Why hadn't i thought of that--The real sad part of finding this fantastic idea is that the majority of my ceilings have all been treated with embossed wall paper (now those were fun projects in which i am in debt ed to a number of friends for) It makes me want to get up off my butt and get creative- and then i get overwhelmed at what i NEED to accomplish so instead I remain sitting here instead. Can I just say I was so impressed with some of the Valentine decorations that i saw it almost made me want to decorate for Valentines Day--and i HATE Valentines Day.
Maybe the word HATE is a bit strong--
perhaps i should substitute LOATH or DETEST--
yes it is more along the line of that I DETEST Valentines Day. I love the idea of expressing LOVE to those you have in your life--I just resent the idea of Hallmark telling me when to do it. I despise the idea that restaurants, flower shops gouge you on that particular day. Maybe i shouldn't hold back and tell you how i really feel. LOL. Early in our marriage, actually i think when we were dating, dear hubby and i agreed that we would for all practical purposes BOYCOTT Valentines day. The agreement was that he would by me flowers through out the year--just because he saw them and thought of me. He is good like that--and usually it is far cheaper than the one bouquet on Valentines day.

I still think it would be fun to decorate for various holidays--maybe when i get my life in order i will do that...in the mean time here are some ideas i found that intrigued me for future use

i liked these rose balls--they were made out of crepe paper. Who doesn't have some leftover streamers floating around--scary part is that i know right where mine is? Why? Why do i know that and why do i have it is the real question?

I wasn't so crazy about how the heart was covered but i loved the open frame and the be mine.

i love the vintage look of these hearts
i think this paper flower topiary would add some nice height to a shelf
this is a frame that you can use for various holidays as the ornaments are interchangeable

i love the burlap look against the black rustic frame

and here i fell in love with the depth and layers on the mantel. It really spoke to me. The hanging heart in the middle was made with polka dot cupcake liners--so stinkin cute!

The problem i found in surfing blogs was that i failed to mark or keep pictures of ones i liked until i was into it for awhile so some of my favorite mantels are only pictured in my head--I couldn't find them again to post the pictures. Like much of my life I will just have to add these things to my list of things i want to do--

Guess i better quit dreaming about having time to do this stuff and really go to bed--night all

2011-01-21T10:37:00.011-07:00

Once upon a time there was this girl.

She liked to blog.

She liked to write about the sweet things in life.

She found ironies in life and wrote about them.
like take for instance the irony of a confederate flag in the parking lot of Gettysburg

(Does anyone else see the heart on the chocolate bar?
Coincidence?
I think not! )

She liked to document what was going on with her family

and occasionally post pictures to go along with it.

She enjoyed this task,
and the creativity that she felt when she did it.
(especially while painting in a thong)

Then life got in the way.

She felt as if she was being attacked from all sides

Or run over,
Putting her lights out,
or maybe just leaving her laying on the ground flashing.

or perhaps just stretched too thin.

She felt as if she had become a robot.

She had became really tired from burning the candle at both ends

and she had ceased having any creative thoughts.

She covered her head in shame

Her mind had become a jumbled blob of molten rock

She was frustrated with not blogging and sat down to write one night.
The words poured out of her.

She was on FIRE!

When she went to correct her spelling she found out that she had been kicked off her Internet connection and everything she had written was GONE.
This made her rather grouchy.

She was sad and frustrated.

Being a good sport she tried again.
Typing away and then she realized that
once again, technology laughed at her attempt.

{{brahhahahaha}}
-the evil sort of laugh that technology has-
Too tired to battle with the computer she went to bed.
Her blogging mo-jo had been defeated
and her blog remained un-updated.

The End

(this post turned out much longer than originally intended--that happens when you have time on your hands and can go back through pictures. Majority of pictures came from our trip to DC)

A boys "BOOB"ectomy

2011-01-12T22:42:00.005-07:00

OK, so my husband will have to forgive me for this post...
I am only putting it up here to document our life--
not that i have been so good about keeping up with documenting our life...
but i figured why not start now...

In the midst of our trials this year I have always tried to look on the bright side of things--some days are easier than others. Even though WE (I say WE, even though I have had a job) have been going through another bout of unemployment, I have tried to focus on the many blessings we have had in our life.(unfortunately my blog has been the receiving end of when i reached the end of my rope--not always the most positive aspect of my life that day)
What I am trying to say is that we have been blessed through this trial.
When we needed a car because ours died--we ended up with two. When our vacuum died my dear hubby found one at a garage sale for only $25.00. Not just any vacuum...it actually was another Kirby so the belts and bags we already had would fit it.
Truly AH-MAZE-ING!

Then i would think...
"Well, even though we don't have a job, we have had our health."
Which when i really reflected back on the year,
was not true.
It was not our best "Health" year.
Who was i kidding?
We started out this year with a broken arm on my second boy--
then we moved onto a torn meniscus on the second daughter.
From there we went to cauliflower ear on the oldest son.
The youngest, while healthy for the most part spent many hours at various doctors appointments getting a better idea of what made him tick
Rounding out the list of children left my oldest child. She was the one that really was blessed with good health--not even a doctors visit for her.
Even i had a trip to urgent care where i almost passed out due to a cut on my toe.

And then that leaves us with the hubby.
Around October he felt a lump that was followed by pain in his chest--(boob)
He asked me if i could feel it--and i could.
It sorta freaked us out--(the lump, and me doing the breast exam)
maybe it was the fact it was Breast Cancer Awareness Month and that was all i heard on the radio and TV. Especially when they had the men on the radio talking about their bouts with breast cancer.That coupled with the fact that years ago we had been told that genetically he was pre-disposed to male breast cancer (his sister had ovarian cancer and that shows up in males as breast cancer) Needless to say we were a bit concerned about this.

He asked me who he should call...
I told him I would have called my OB/GYN but i don't think they are currently accepting men in their practice--talk about a square peg trying to fit in a round hole--ya just don't see many men as patients in those offices--although there was that man (ex-woman) who made the news years ago for having a baby. But that is a story for another day
So he proceeded to call the regular old doctor.
He went in and saw him and guess what?
He had a lump.
We were shocked!
REALLY?
A Lump--
Please tell us something we didn't know--
and then we got to wait...
...weeks...
for another appointment.
This time it was with a surgeon.
We finally saw him, in which he told us it was pretty much nothing.
NOTHING???
But it hurts...
and we found out it would not go away with out surgery--
hubby could choose to live with the lump and suck up the pain that came with it
or opt for surgery. The surgeon made it sound like it was no big deal, so we chose surgery--we fondly referred to it as a "boob"-ectomy.

Now don't get me wrong--I realize that breast cancer and the surgery is no joking matter--just the idea of it is very scary. I had a dear friend that passed away from that horrible disease. It definitly does not fight fair. For some reason my hubby was embarrassed about this mass being on his chest and the levity of a calling it a boob-ectomy lightened the stress related to our situation plus my kids thought it was funny :) as did I. There is something about saying
BOOB--ectomy that makes me smile--
(emphasise on the word BOOB)

Off to get an EKG just to make sure his ticker was OK since they were going to put him under.
Surgery was scheduled and once again we got to WAIT.
Some how, this WAIT and see thing seems to be a theme for us this year--
nothing like the hurry up and WAIT to try ones patience...
test ones faith..and generally irritate even the most patient person-

The day before the surgery we got a call from the surgeon to CANCEL.!?
Apparently there was something outside of the norm on the EKG and he wanted dear hubby to see a Cardiologist prior to being put under. Again we got to WAIT.
Finally the day came and he saw the Cardiologist who said everything was fine--
Oh, the emotional roller coaster we get to ride--

Finally he had the surgery and all went well and the doctor said he would be fine,that he would be around many more years to be a bed hog and generally drive me crazy... OK maybe the doctor didn't say the last part but i thought it as he was telling me all was well...
It wasn't the actual incision that bothered my hubby so much as it was the tape holding on the bandage that pulled on the chest hairs that bothered him.
I loved the fact that the nurses put extra tape on just to make sure it would stick--they sorta liked giving him a hard time--I was loving it
On the way home while my husband was still feeling a bit "Loopy" he fondly asked me.
"Will you still love me if I only have one nipple"
I waited until he ripped off the bandage in irritation and saw that he was still "complete" with two nipples before i responded--"Of course dear"

A jewish Christmas

2010-12-02T18:47:00.009-07:00

Let me preface this by saying:
I love diversity.
I think we can appreciate each other for our different beliefs, and if what you believes makes you happy--
who am i to tell you that you are wrong?
I also believe we all need to be more tolerate of each other-
and learn about each other and what we each believe--
i think being open minded is a good thing
i think it makes us more well rounded when we step outside our box--
So if any of you read this and are offended--
or if i got facts wrong
I am sorry--
just remember i am not perfect
and i am not above being corrected....
So with that being said....
Sometimes i wish i was Jewish.
I know, sorta random and ya wanna know why?
I mean i already play the stereo typed part at times--
like when i tell random children (sometimes not even mine) to put a sweater on, usually because i am cold.
Or how about when i make far more food than is humanly possible to eat in one setting.
(not that you find me cooking very often,but when i do it is in abundance)
I have been accused of nagging, being pushy, and on the occasion, laying on a guilt trip.
(but only when needed)
Maybe this is not so much Jewish mother qualities, as they are MOTHER qualities--
and since i am a mother,
i am required to have those qualities,
and use them any chance i get.
Call them the superpowers of motherhood if you will.

But honestly i find the idea of Judaism appealing.
Take Hanukkah for instance.
The ornamental/decoration set up is at a minimum.
A candle holder is about it.
No tree to pick out--
or if you go environmentally friendly to fluff.
No boxes full of ornaments to pull out,unwrap and hang.
No Nativities to set up, stockings to hang,
or Christmas goodies/cookies to bake.
And there is no need to feel guilty for not sending out Christmas cards.

The last few years has found my Christmas spirit lacking--
just not enough time in the days and weeks prior to Christmas to get it all done. In fact one year I was so far behind I just bought a new tree and ornaments and we set it up on Christmas Eve. 8 days of present giving--
I like the idea of spreading out the chaos
OK, sure i know these are superficial reasons,
but I also like Latkes--
(food is never considered superficial)
Just today i was talking with a friend who is Jewish about them. I made the comment "Ya know what would make Latkes even better?" Being a good sport and giving a gentile an opportunity to chime in on her holiday she indulged me and said, "oh yeah what?" I replied
"Frying them in bacon grease--
everything is better with bacon"
She gave me a look--and then i started laughing...
but seriously, potatoes fried in bacon grease?
Is there any thought more mouth watering heavenly?
Maybe that would keep me from being Jewish--
I sorta like my pork.

Change

2010-12-01T07:35:00.004-07:00

There is that old saying:
The more things change,
the more they stay the same.
I am feeling like that is my mantra right now.

Recently there have been some changes at work--
BIG changes...
FINALLY!

13 years at the same job
same boss up until a year ago
same supervisor until today!
The one thing i really disliked about my job is gone.
She can no longer make my life miserable just for the fun of it.
She no longer has control.
And i feel a touch bit sad (sorta) for her,
but then again i believe you make your own bed
and you have to play nice with people
and she didn't.
Being competent helps too...

So i was hoping to get her job when she made her exodus.
But i didn't.
I would lie if i didn't say i wasn't disappointed.
I would lie if i didn't say i was ready for some change in my life, for some new responsibility.
Unfortunetly it it not going to happen like i wanted it to
so the question remains:
What am i going to do to make a change occur?
How am i going to step out of my comfort zone?
Maybe NOT getting this job is a good thing...
maybe it is the thing i need to force me to make my own changes
my own destiny....
lets see where this change will take me.

Pitty party

2010-11-30T21:16:00.000-07:00

My proverbial half full glass has been turned over and SPILT.
But i didn't cry over it--cuz it was milk...
and we don't cry over spilt milk.

I am tired of looking at that half full glass
It has been taunting me.
Some days I swear it is half empty.
Some days i think the contents contained within the glass
are sour--
sorta like my mood.

Feeling a bit frustrated with the speed bumps in life right now--
tired of hoping that things will work out--
tired of being disappointed when they don't.
TIRED of being positive and looking on the bright side of things
Just plain tired--
the thought of staying in bed and pulling the covers back over my head sounds wonderful.
Especially due to the fact it is {{{COLD}}} outside, and dark...
and it is far earlier than i have any real desire to be humanly awake.
Shutting the world and all its demands out sounds even better...
BUT...
I can't.
I have to pull my sorry butt out of this toasty warm bed.
throw on some clothes.
put a smile on my face and appear like all is well with the world,
when really right now i feel like...
life SUCKS.
But i do it, cuz i like having a roof over my head,
and a car to drive,
and that little thing called food i find rather attractive as well.

Tomorrow I will tip my glass up.
Find something to fill it with,
and try to think of it as half full.
I know i am blessed,
just right now I am not being blessed the way i want to be...
I'll get over it
Eventually.....

Not so "NORMAL"

2010-11-25T08:57:00.021-07:00

Today is a NEW day...
things always look better at the start of the day,
that and good nights sleep help.

My lil' man just came and attacked me in bed--
He is such a sweetie.

Like take for instance when he took my cup of hot chocolate that my dear hubby just brought me, he made sure that i knew he had it and in his limited vocabulary told me:
"Thank you" before he slugged down the rest of it,
and then {{burped}} for boyish effect, and proceeded to laugh .

Just a normal little boy...that isn't.

At least not how text books define "Normal"
(but then really which of us are???)

So this week after nine years of trying to find answers as to what makes this boy tick i feel like we actually got one. For years i resisted the idea of having a conclusive answer that would place him in a box, that would define him and what he is or isn't.

What he is: a sweet little thing that wants to communicate.

What he isn't: is a normal boy who can communicate by normal means
i.e. sentences that contain words that you actually understand

Yet,he does communicate--he tries really hard to communicate. He loves to find the phone and talk away. He has entire conversations of which we understand little to none of what he is saying, and yet we often understand him and what he is trying to convey, just not specific details. It is the details that tend to get lost.

This sweet boy has had to work at pretty much everything that comes to others so easily. Any time spent with him you realize he is not your "normal" 9 year old.

We have seen many doctors over the years looking for answers. Many tests have been done all of which have come back "within the normal limits" and yet he is NOT--normal that is. We have left these doctors shaking their heads wondering what they are missing. I have almost given up trying to find out. If I had an answer would it change anything??? Probably not.

On our most recent visit to our geneticist she was reviewing an MRI that we had done a few years ago. She saw some things that gave her reason to pause and send us for further testing. Off we went to the Neuro-surgeon for a consult. After a new MRI and waiting for almost 2 hours to be seen, we were told that according to the textbook that defines this particular malformation, our wee one does not fit that diagnosis. The doctor said that even though according to the text book definition he does NOT have a Chiari Malformation
--he does.

So what does this mean to us?
Bottom line. His head which is small (microcephaly) is squeezing the middle/central part of his brain causing many of his problems. Nothing they can do about that--it is what it is. There is a surgery that they can do to alleviate some of the pressure that is on his brain, but at this time we probably would not see the benefits. We were given a list of things to keep our eye on in the future, and if anything changes we will address it then.

Good news: we have an answer of sorts
Bad news: it does little to change what we can do for him.

He will never be your text book "normal". He will have to continue to work harder than most to achieve what we take for grated. He continues to make progress--which gives us hope--it is just SLOW in coming.

And while there are many things that he has to work hard to understand, there are some things that are just innate in little boys--even special little boys--take bathroom humor. He gets that! No one had to teach him about that--He cracks up when gas is passed. He thinks it is a riot when his dad has him pull his finger--he has even learned to make bodily function sounds (the kid can't speak, but he can mimic passing gas?) He understands potty humor in movies and on TV--
i guess there is some parts of normal than no handicap can hold back.
He is my sweet love bug.

He is the child that verbally will not talk back to me when he becomes a ratty teenager

He is the child who still needs and wants a hand to hold on to

He is the child that will always give unsolicited hugs to anyone.
Even those who don't know they need one

including in-animate people at Lego land

He is the child that brings out the best in my other children

He is the child who will continue to believe in Santa
years after he shouldn't anymore.

He will be the kid that finds joy in the simple things
like blowing out candles on his birthday

or ICECREAM

(don't say this word around him if you have no intention of getting him some)

he has no fear of animals-

real or stuffed
he finds awe in the simple things like sand
and loves to share it with others

he loves all babies and wants to snuggle them any chance he can get

so who needs "NORMAL" when you have him?...

At least now we have an answer

hindsight thinks it's so smart

2010-11-24T23:09:00.003-07:00

what a day.
I feel like i am drained...
like my life force has been sucked out of me...
maybe it is the headache--
or the roller coaster ride i have been on.
Not an actual roller coaster, but the emotional one.

Highs and lows today
confidence,
nervousness,
assertiveness,
pride,
disappointment...
and now i am feeling like hindsight is a B#*$%.
I have decided that I don't like hindsight
espcially when it shows up, raining on my parade.
Just when you think you did well hindsight comes in and undermines you.
So now i sit here doubting
wondering if i did what i needed to,
If i said the "right" things,
if i made the best impression...
It is like taking a test, and thinking you initially did awesome
only to ponder on it and question whether you did or not.
And the worst part is...
I won't know the results of this life test until next week.
So now i sit and wait and wonder,
and question everything i said and beat myself up.
I wish i didn't care.
Life is easier when you really don't care about a particular outcome
Unfortunately right now i do care
and i am torturing myself in the meantime...
tomorrow will be better...
I hope?

mom's milestone birthday

2010-11-18T07:22:00.015-07:00

Today is my mom's birthday
and I will add
It is a BIG one
Not the big ONE--cuz if she was only ONE i would not be here.
But this is a birthday that is a marker in the measuring stick of life...
one that is normally viewed as...
do i dare say
{{{{ShUdDeR}}}
OLD???
I know my mom is, lets say "taken back" by the fact that she has hit this milestone in her life. But the reality of it is, she has kids that are on the back side of their forties (not me though) and she has grand kids that are in their twenties--and unfortunately for her we waited until the year she turned 50 to give her those grand kids...

(this picture was from her birthday three years ago-- mom looks pretty much the same, but my how the kids have changed)

I don't think of my mom as OLD
--maybe just OLDER--
but then again she has always been OLDER than me--
that is sorta how it works when you are the kid.

Actually I think of my mom in her forties
I guess that is really how i remember her best,

since that was the age she was in when i was growing up--
but now i am in my forties--
I am the mom--
actually I have become my MOM--

well not as totally awesome as she is
but I am trying...
but this post is NOT about ME.
It is about my MOM
And MILESTONES.

So what can I say about 70?
Yes mom is turning 70--
I hope she is NOT offended by the fact that i am posting this for the blog world to see....
--because the truth of the matter is--
she DEFIES the stereotype of what 70 is supposed to be,

or at least what i think 70 should be
She is amazing.
At 70 she still gets up (well actually most people get up, unless the are dead)
but she goes out and tries to instill some of her wealth of knowledge on the youth of today. And some of the youth of today think they know it all (they will soon learn they don't)--and i love the fact that she battles with them--It would be so easy to just give up--but what she has to offer will change their lives if they let it. I love that she is still excited about what she is teaching, and is constantly finding new ways to inspire and educate. Dare i say that most people her age are DONE with that part of their lives. Most are content to reminisce about the things of the past and gripe about the youth of today--but there is my mom on her 70Th birthday

--at work--

making a difference.

I will also go on the record as saying
for a 70 year old
she looks pretty darn good!
Many of my friends can hardly believe she is 70!?!?
She is also pretty spry for a 70 year old

(i think you have to use the word spry when you are talking about a 70 year old)

but perhaps i could use the words

Agile, Alert,Energetic,Full of Pep,Nimble,

On the Go,Quick,Spirited...

Any of the above words would fit...
Just last summer we hiked Multnomah Falls in Oregon--
(on the spur of the moment)

It was a blast.
She scurried up the mountain--
dragging my sad butt along.
I would almost say i was slug like,
but after seeing this slug
and seeing how ugly and truly slow it moved, i decided i did not want to be compared to a slug...

When i would get tired I would pause and take pictures along the way

It is amazing how you can use a camera to catch your breath...

or use your camera to take your breath away

We had a great time--
a beautiful day spent together
and in true teenage fashion we paused to take aim with my camera--
Pointing it up in the air and squeezing together
we were hoping for a shot with us and the falls in it
What we got was this....

Meet our new friend.
We call him random man.
It made for a great laugh.

I love my mom--
she continually amazes me.
She is a wealth of knowledge.
She is my greatest cheerleader--
She is ALWAYS there when i need her
or when my kids need her.
I know that the calender says 70...
but i say
THINGS ONLY GET BETTER WITH AGE!!!
Love you mom

giving blood--part duex

2010-11-15T09:55:00.001-07:00

It is that time of year again--
you know, the time of year when the blood mobile comes cruising around my sons school campus encouraging kids to be civic minded and give of their red stuff freely.
He gave blood for the first time last year at this time--
this year he wanted to give again--
despite my reminder about what happened last time.
He proceeded to remind me that he was now 18
and could do what he wanted,
and that i didn't need to sign the permission slip.
(Oh how i hate when they get all smarty pants just cuz the government tells them that legally now they are an adult)
He then went on to say that he was going to take it easy at practice in the afternoon,(at least he learned from last years mistake)
and just ride the stationary bike--
So with that, he went off to school--
off to donate blood.

A few hours later i got a phone call from my son, but because i was working i was unable to answer it right away. I tried calling him back only to get a busy signal. Then a few minutes later I got a text from my hubby--it read something like this--
"Your son inherited your pass out gene"
WHAT????
I called the hubby. He had gone and picked up my boy.
Yes he gave blood--
No, he didn't actually pass out--just short of it.
Does anyone see the irony that my legal adult child
still needed his mom and dad?
It is nice to still be needed--
(even if he didn't need me to sign the permission slip)
He hung out at home for the remainder of the afternoon--
taking the day off from practice.
His coach told him that he is banished from giving blood during wrestling season anymore--
I think/hope he will listen this time

Miraculous Lunch with the Lunch Lady

2010-11-13T18:39:00.003-07:00

I should have titled this entry
"Miracles do Happen" or perhaps "Birthday Blessings",

But I prefer Lunch Lady, because in my mind that is what stood out about this day
One of my girlfriends is always good at getting us to laugh.
She is just plain silly and we get to giggling.

She is the lunch lady

Here she is showing us her lunch lady picture that will go in the year book.

Seriously I don't know why it cracks me up--

maybe it is her lunch lady dance.

A few weeks before my birthday I was strongly urged (by the lunch lady) or maybe it was a polite requested that I should pick "Crackers" restaurant for my birthday...don't get me wrong I really like/love this restaurant so it wasn't much of a sacrifice--especially when they told me why they wanted to go there--

Pumpkin Bread Pudding.

Mind you this is a seasonal item--new to our taste buds and i am here to say

It did NOT disappoint

This place is also known for their blackberry bread pudding year around

...soooo DELISH

Just thinking about it is making me salivate.

Now the reason this entry is entitled "Miraculous".
There are a total of six of us.

We have been friends for a mighty long time and have shared MANY birthday lunches together. It was far easier when our kids were little to get together, but as they have gotten older our lives and schedules have become just a tad complicated to say the least. Often we bounce around a dozen e-mails or so before we come to a consensus as to a time and date. Now enter in my birthday. It only further complicates because it falls right around Thanksgiving--not exactly a calm and UN-busy time of year. To add to the chaos this year one friend had a child getting married right after Thanksgiving. I thought for sure that i would have to forgo the birthday lunch.
You can imagine all of our surprise when a date was thrown out for the upcoming weekend and
EVERYONE could make it.?
We were amazed.
In awe.
Mystified.
We all decided we are much better planning on the cuff than too far in the future.

It was a great day with my friends.

You can guess what my birthday wish was ....

Well maybe you can't, and i am not really supposed to say...

but i will give you a hint...

It involves many more good times with all these girls

and laughing with the lunch lady.

Thank goodness for birthdays to bring us all together

Day 2 of Gratitude=Womans Right to Vote

2010-11-02T10:01:00.009-07:00

I think this month of finding gratitude is just what i needed to kick start my brain.

As I was driving this morning i found myself thinking of gratitude

and what i was grateful for-can i just say
it was HARD!
All i was managing to come up with was all the things that were irritating me

and not grateful for...

It started with a rough night sleeping and being woken up far earlier than need be.

Then there were the the drivers who were going slower than the posted speed
(come on people...pick up the pace, we all have places to go)

Or those drivers that ignored my blinker,and felt the need to pass me even though i was trying to get over. (Really can you not see the big YELLOW bus)

And then there was the sun that was shining in my eyes as i was trying to drive.

I then realized that I should be appreciating the wonderful sun

and the chance to have it shine in my life

for I know there are many who are not blessed with its abundance like I am

living here in the sunshine-y state of Arizona.

I tend to take it for granted.

I realized that this grateful thing is hard when your mind set is not where it should be

...so i went with the basics hoping to change my train of thought.

I started with the big one
I am grateful for the fact that i rolled out of bed

for that means one thing:

I AM ALIVE!!!

OK, that really puts it all in perspective

when you think about the option of being 6 feet under.

every day is a blessing,

and what you choose to with that is up to you

So, today I chose to fulfill my civic duty and exercised

(yes, I used the word exercise for this is the only kind you will see me doing)

my right to VOTE!

the chance to have my voice heard, is on that i do not take lightly,

especially as a WOMAN.

(I am woman hear me roar)

thinking about the privilege of the right to vote had me wondering so i did a little research.

(i think i might have slept through the details of this during high school)

Did you know that as a whole,

woman have only had the chance to vote as a nation for

90 years???
Yes, you read that right,

90 years!!!

on August 26Th 1920, the 19Th Amendment to the Constitution was changed

allowing all women in all states the right to vote.

(many woman -primarily in the west were already voting)

that is only back to my grandmothers generation that gained that privilege

CRAZY to think about it,

something that i have really take for granted.

It made me think of the scene from Mary Poppins where you see Mrs. Banks coming in from suffragettes march and breaking out in song:
One hears the restless cries!
From ev'ry corner of the land:
"Womankind, arise!"
Political equality and equal rights with men!
Take heart! For Missus Pankhurst has been clapped in irons again!

No more the meek and mild subservients we!
We're fighting for our rights, militantly!
Never you fear!

So, cast off the shackles of yesterday!
Shoulder to shoulder into the fray!
Our daughters' daughters will adore us
And they'll sign in grateful chorus
"Well done! Well done!
Well done Sister Suffragette!"

From the movie Mary Poppins--Walt Disney 1961

I love the line

"Our daughters' daughters with adore us"

for it is true...we need to hold those woman in high esteem

that fought for our right to vote!

If you look back at history, often the right thing to do,

is not the easy or popular thing of the time.

So Sister Suffragettes,

Today I am GRATEFUL for you and your tenacity

to NOT give up when the going got tough!

i may not always like my options or the outcome--but i love the opportunity I have to vote and I will take advantage of my civic duty every time--for in not doing so, it would be like me telling my sisters who fought for my rights that it was not needed or wanted--And today i am grateful for their willingness to not give up the fight for my opportunity to cast my opinion...

November 2010

2010-11-01T09:50:00.004-07:00

Today is November 1st!

Truly where has the year gone--

where has the FALL gone?

Were we not just starting school like say...

Last week?

Maybe the fact that it is too warm to wear sweaters past
9am, that has me in denial that it really is November.

But one look at the calender tells me the truth...
It really is November 1st, which means

It is my BiRthDaY month!

And thanksgiving.
Two of my most favorite things in the year...

So in honor of my birthday month I shall celebrate
all month long,like take today for instance...
today i shall celebrate by
BLOGGING.!
I mean after all,
what is a birthday month if you don't get to do the things you want to do?
And since i feel like Thanksgiving is the overlooked holiday
I am going to do my best to make it the big deal it is.
I mean really...
who doesn't like a holiday that is
all about the food
well,except maybe a bulimic or someone who is anorexic
which is NOT me...

But more than the food
I love the idea of the THANKFUL part.
Too often in life we go about our day
not really appreciating the blessings we have been given.
Or we give thanks for those common things,the big things.

SOooo this month i am working on my gratitude
of the little things,the everyday unappreciated things
So here is to a month of giving THANKS.
Anyone with me???

Today i am thankful for:
The fact i can wear SOCKS and tennis shoes

You have to understand that this is a big deal to me
because for the last 7 months or so it has been too hot
to wear shoes let alone socks,
and on those days when i would my poor feet would scream out in a boycott.
I am not exaggerating here--there would be muffled screams as my poor feet would enter into the shoes..
But finally it has gotten cool enough...
and my feet are loving be wrapped up and warm and toasty.

MIA

2010-10-31T12:00:00.002-07:00

I have missed you my baby blue background ed blog.
I have missed checking up on my friends in cyber-space
and I have missed writing...
I feel like my brain has become mush
with very few creative thoughts coming from it these days.
Have I mentioned "these days?"
Why no i haven't..
Why?
Because these days finds me BUSY,
BUSY
BUSY.
I have always felt like i was busy,
but I guess I have been wrong,
or maybe the busy is different.
Yeah, I think that is it.
My busy as of late has consisted of the NEED to work.
I have always worked but it is different now.
My family is now dependent on me working--
for things that in the past that we sorta took for granted
like food,
air conditioning
and a roof over our heads--
just the everyday things of life,
that normally i don't think twice about not having,
but we do still have
because i am blessed with a job.
A job that makes me tired.
A job where i am working more hours than ever before...
but thankful for the job and the pay non the less.

I always said that we could never support our family on what i made
and we aren't--(thankful for the meager unemployment)
and other blessings that have come our way...
Dear hubby and i were talking the other day about our finances...
amazing how a year ago we could not have even fathomed getting by on what we are
maybe this is the lesson we are to learn from this trial--
truly the more you have
the more you spend,
and what were we spending it on???
We decided that we are now in a position to take a job
that does not have the income we were accustomed too--
I mean if we have to and all...
and if someone would offer....
but in the mean time i will continue to burn the candle at both ends
and one of these days i might even manage to come up with a creative thought or two,
and maybe even manage to find the time and energy to put the words down on my blog.

Don't give up on me.
I need your support and PRAYERS more now than ever.

just me ranting...

2010-06-07T17:12:00.004-07:00

The anticipation is killing me
(not really)
I am sick of my life
(sorta)
I am tired of being patient
(definitely)
and this thing called FAITH
can be wearing at times....
And yet somehow,
someway,
I find a reason to get up in the morning--
which just for the sake of argument
is MUCH earlier than i would normally be getting up or want to get up at,
and yet i do--without an alarm!

Waiting can be tiring--
so I guess i should be glad that i have something to keep me busy
even if it does require that i am working out in the heat--
doing a nasty job--
one that i would not be doing except for the fact
that you do,
what you have to do,
to make ends meet...
and i am thankful that our ends have been meeting,
that i have a job
(even if i am not loving/liking it right now)
I am thankful for the food we have to eat
I am thankful for the roof over my head
that we are all basically healthy
cars to drive
AIR CONDITIONING
I am thankful for a loving husband
and his desire to find a job
Now if someone else could see that and offer him one i would be really
THANKFUL...
and yes i am thankful for this trial
I am learning about strength
and more lessons on PATIENCE
than i really care for...
but...
I also know that this is not
FOREVER...
because FOREVER is a mighty long time
and i mean to tell you...
LET'S GO CRAZY
(Oops sorry about the prince reference)
but seriously,
sometimes i feel like this is how it has always been
how quickly we can forget
I guess that is why we are given trials
to remind us that we are NOT alone
to remind us to have FAITH
and with that faith comes PEACE
and i do have PEACE...
I don't know why I am at peace?
why i am not all stressed out?
but i just know that things will (eventually) be OK!
and I am OK with that
although i would like a magic 8 ball to confirm it--
but in lieu of the magic 8 ball i will accept a call from my hubby
(who is at a job interview in Cali)
just telling me that he did well--
telling me he had a job offer would be even better
but i will continue to work on that thing called
PATIENCE....
for a know that one day soon that call will come....
and prayers will be answered.

the ladder of success

2010-05-30T13:23:00.000-07:00

This little boy of mine is a regular sweetheart

He has had to work harder than most kids to do things that most people find and do naturally.

Like climbing a ladder for instance--

Not a big deal for most 8 year olds

but he is not like most 8 year olds--
but LIKE most 8 year olds he ignored me,
as i told him to get down.
I guess he figured if i had a camera in my hand and if i was taking pictures it was OK for him to continue UP on his ladder of success.
He got close to the top and gave me this look--

Since he cannot verbalize what he was thinking,
I am free for my own interpretation as to what he had on his mind.
I am thinking it went something like this
"What is your problem old lady?
See, I knew I could do it"

"I don't know what the big deal is.
Infact if i raise my arms I can almost touch the roof"

Or maybe that was in celebration of the fact that he has crossed another milestone off of his list of being a "normal" kid--the list of things to do to drive your momma crazy--one of those lists that usually involves blood and trips to the ER, or if it is not too serious just Urgent Care.

I guess i should be glad he is working so hard at being normal and driving me crazy and ignoring me like a normal kid would do--who knows what kind of opportunities he has now opened up with his ladder climbing? I mean the possibilities are endless--like using this new found skill to climb up on the roof and jump off onto the trampoline---YIKES--i need to remember to keep him away from his brothers and their "normal/evil" influence over this sweet boy.....

international eats week

2010-05-29T20:36:00.009-07:00

It is not a secret that i DO enjoy food--
food is more than just a necessity of life,
it is more than something just to keep me alive.

It is a pleasure,
something to be savored,
ENJOYED!-
and i do ENJOY it.

Maybe it was the fact that i grew up with a mother who ran a cooking school and we were her test kitchen for various recipes--depending on the new lesson plan being written up determined what we would be eating. In my foggy food memory i remember tasting a variety of cold cherry soup? Dinner time was always fun with all gathered around the table and when she was testing a new recipe we were allowed to give constructive criticism--it helped us learn to distinguish the food that was placed on our palate--the varying spices and the way something was put together. I love the fact that i was exposed to so many different flavors at such an early age and that i was given the opportunity to experience different cultures through food. I think it also helped that I was raised in a home where picky eaters really were not allowed. Now that doesn't mean that we ate everything and that we liked everything. We lived by the two bite rule--you had to take two bites and then you could be finished with it. I have continued on with that rule in my life and i have found that some of my earlier dislikes are now tolerable or even likable. I have found that tastes do change as you get older....most significant example of that is my husband and his great disdain for asparagus--now he is the one picking it up and cooking it, when not to long ago he was snubbing his nose and making gagging noises when he would be confronted with it. We have tried to incorporate that same attitude toward food with our kids and for the most part they are adventurous when it comes to new flavors.

Now i will go on the record saying that while i know how to cook i am not the one that takes the role of chef--that would be my husband and my middle son is quickly following in his footsteps. Often you will find these two together in the kitchen

usually my son plays the role of sous chef--
(yes that is a micro planner he is using)

he will make some girl really happy one day.
He has been caught on occasions bragging to the "chicks" about his (to quote him) "mad cooking skills" He loves being in the kitchen--loves whipping up stuff--he is working on his knife skills--and i don't mean whittling--

even his dad wanted in on the mincing, dicing and slicing action.
They sorta had a knife off

in reviewing the pictures i couldn't help but notice my daughters face in this one

not sure if that is a look of disgust for what they were chopping up (shrimp) or maybe the way it smelled--or perhaps she was noting the competiveness of the male cooks in her household, whatever the case she didn't want a part of it until the poststickers were finished.....

to be continued......

secret ingredient

2010-05-23T22:43:00.004-07:00

Tonight i found out i was channeling top chef
Not their cooking skills but the secret ingredient.
CAULIFLOWER--is that spelled correct?
or is it
CALIFLOUR-or perhaps
CAWLIFLEUR--well which ever way you say it,
or spell it,
it tends to be an underrated, underused vegetable.
Maybe it is because it is lacking in vibrance--
after all it is just a shade of white-
doesn't exactly scream at you--
and it tends to be one of those vegetables that sits well with others showing off their colors, like broccoli or carrots.
Usually it is cooked pretty much the same way--steamed
and i am not a lover of it in the RAW--

I found myself looking a various blogs and recipe sites in search of a recipe for a stuffed flank steak. We got a real good deal on some the other day and i figured we could do something like that. In my search i came across a recipe for a mashed cauliflower--it intrigued me and i wanted to try it out, but i assumed that we probably did not have the main ingredient--Cauliflower--It really has not been a vegetable that we have kept in our fridge on a regular basis--but low and behold there was a head of cauliflower waiting for me to mash it up.

And mash it I did.

It was down right tasty--enjoyed by the majority of my kids--although one did say it was OK and that she preferred it just steamed with the other bright vegetables.
Bottom line is--anytime you add cheese and butter and garlic to anything it has got to taste good--I am thinking this one will be a keeper--anything that can disguise a vegetable has got to be good

Brown Butter Cauliflower Mash

This recipe is a low-carb, healthy alternative to mashed potatoes. The consistency is so creamy and delicious, you won’t believe it’s cauliflower. The flavors are cheesy and delicious!

1 medium head cauliflower
4 tablespoon cream cheese, softened
1/3 cup sour cream
1/4 cup grated Parmesan
1 teaspoon minced garlic
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1/2 teaspoon chopped chives or green onion
4 tablespoons unsalted butter
1/2 cup asiago cheese (i didn't have this and it was great without it)
4 tablespoons basil pesto (optional)
Set a stockpot of water to boil over high heat.
Clean and cut the cauliflower into small pieces. Cook in boiling water for about 6 minutes, or until well done. Meanwhile, melt the butter in a small saucepan and cook the garlic until fragrant, about 1 minute.
Drain the cauliflower well; do not let cool and pat it very dry between several layers of paper towels.
In the bowl, mash the hot cauliflower with the cream cheese, sour cream, Parmesan, asiago, butter, garlic, salt, and pepper until almost smooth.
Mix in chives and pesto, if desired, and serve

another milestone

2010-05-18T20:22:00.006-07:00

There are things that you take for granted when you have "NORMAL" kids
(actually i would like to know what "normal" is?)
All my kids are "special" but my baby has what some refer to as "special needs"
So with that being said he continues to amaze me as his does "normal" things.
Things that are just your everyday "normal" milestones--
but for a kid that has to work hard to find "normal" they are moments of celebration
TODAY was one of those days.

This kid has always enjoyed puzzles--
not actually putting the pieces in them,
more like dumping them out
and watching me put them together.
I have gotten pretty good at his puzzles--
and i have been waiting for the day when he could do them--
and
TODAY was the day!

I sat in awe as i watched my little buddy match up the colors
and not only attempt to place them but SUCCEED

now if we could only find the pieces of the puzzle that he has already lost--
that will be the next major accomplishment...
one step at a time

Minor things can become moments of great revelation
when encountered for the first time--

Margot Fonteyn

Census meltdown

2010-05-18T19:40:00.003-07:00

I have a short fuse--
sometimes it doesn't take much for it to go off and when it does
WATCH OUT!
Stupid things really set me off
and don't even get me started on stupid people....

Tonight I have been enjoying a lovely evening at home
Kids running around, dinner in the belly
and curled up on the couch reading a book--
such peace and tranquility filled my heart....

and then the phone rang
and all calm and peace left me
and the blood pressure went up--
it is stupid that i let it bug me
that i got worked up over it
but...I did....

So what is it that set off my buttons you might ask?
A phone call that was redundant and stupid
even the person on the other line agreed that the questions were redundant
and yet she continued to ask them because she had to...
WHATEVER??!!

It was a phone call from the census
Now i want to go on the record
i think the census is important,
i was actually employed by the census 10 years ago
and that I did fill out this current census before it was due this time around
and i mailed it back in--
before it was due,
and yet i still got this phone call, questioning my answers.

I sorta tried to be patient (was not succeeding at it) as she read the long paragraph off her computer screen--OK i get it--you have to ask me some questions, get on with it. It was the repeating of what i had filled out that irked me--asking me the same question poised different ways that really set me off. LOOK LADY, I FILLED IT OUT LIKE YOU ASKED BEFORE THE DATE AND MAILED IT BACK--IT IS ACCURATE--YES ALL THE PEOPLE LIVED IN MY HOUSE BEFORE THAT DATE, ON THAT DATE, AND SINCE THAT DATE. NO ONE ELSE LIVED HERE--IF THEY HAD I WOULD HAVE PUT THEM DOWN--
UGH!!!! (just a taste of the convo that took place)

why bother to have me fill it out if you are just going to call me and go over EVERY question all over again--i am not an idiot--the census is not rocket science--but apparently they think we are not capable of doing it without their help--BARF--more government waste--all i saw as i was talking with this woman was my tax dollars going down the toilet--all on a day when we went to vote for a sales tax increase because my local and state government wants to spend more of my hard earned money--actually spend is not the right word--WASTE is more appropriate--just dang frustrated with the governments inability to stay on a budget and their solution is to take take take...more more more.

OK i am done--well sorta--i am sure i will have a melt down on some future date as i watch my hard earned money wasted on stupid things
things like phone calls that interrupt my quiet tranquil evening at home.

i am getting too old for this

2010-05-07T10:20:00.002-07:00

It has happened.
Somewhere along the line i have gotten old--
not OLDER....just OLD.

I remember those days when the party was just starting at 9pm
and staying up after midnight was no big deal--
but those days are gone--
LONG GONE i say!
Somewhere along the way 9pm became my wind down time
(FYI i had to look up the word wind down because i thought it was spelled wrong--after all that is also wind--as in it will blow you away--but yep it is spelled right)
and midnight was something i only saw when i was forced to work late.

The kid in me who refuses to get old thought i could pull a late nighter--
it didn't matter that i was waking up at 5am--
I thought i could stay up late when i wanted to--
so with that thought i was off to the movies with my oldest daughter and son
at MIDNIGHT.
Tonight found us waiting in line for the debut of Ironman 2

On different occasions we have been those die hard people who are off to see the new release of a movie at midnight--me a person who doesn't care for crowds or waiting in line has been one of those people that can't wait 12 more hours to see the movie at a reasonable hour. One thing that seeing a movie at midnight has going for it is that it is an EXPERIENCE. If you are a people watcher (which i am) it is like winning the lottery of wierdness. Only in the dark of night do some of these people venture out--only because they are too strange fit into normal society--fantasy movies really bring them out in all costumed garb--this movie however did not have much by way of wierdo's--atleast none that i saw (what a disappointment)

Bottom line--i was awake until the movie started--once the previews were over and the lights really went down...so did my eyes. People ask me how it was--and i honestly repond.."the parts i saw were good"--the only thing that kept me awake toward the end was all the soda i had drank earlier--my poor bladder was so full--but i refused to leave the movie and go to the bathroom--I mean i didn't want to miss it??? Actually i figured if i was uncomfortable enough it would have to keep me awake--and it did.

I came home thinking i would crash until i had to get up in 3 hours--NOPE--i slept like crap. I was so worried that i was going to oversleep for work that i kept waking up--until it was finally time to really get up--dragging myself all the way. Was it worth it--Probably not--but somewher along the way i still want to hang out with my kids--and sometimes they ask you to be there friend at odd times of the night
--and i will continue to do it--
nextime,
just let me take a nap first

No Good Deed goes Unpunished...

2010-04-29T21:04:00.004-07:00

Where has the time gone--
FLOWN BY--i say!
Was it really December when i last posted?
Some how life has gotten crazy,
crazy busy--
crazy, crazy, busy
to the point where i have been too tired to put two thoughts together
let alone an entire statement.
I would love to play catch up on what has been going on--
but....
that is not going to happen tonight.
So instead I will write about this weeks adventure/trial/blessing....
I guess i will decide which category it fits in once it is over.....

Since the hubby has been on the High Council our time together on Sundays has been reduced. Most Sundays he is in the ward he is assigned to and then once a month or so he gets the chance to speak in other various wards. On occasion i am able to go hear him speak--but more often than not I don't. When he speaks he is responsible to get another speaker to go with him chosen from a list. Once in awhile that list is short and he has to scramble for another speaker--this happened last summer and he was willing to volunteer me, and I in turn quickly volunteered my oldest daughter who was returning from Africa a few days before he needed a speaker. Missing her family, my daughter was quick to oblige her fathers request, and there for took me off the hook. I had dodged the bullet--for now....

Fast forward 8 months and once again it found my husband scrambling for a companion speaker--to which he informed me that I was his companion and I would get to speak with him--to which i promptly told him--"Yeah, I don't think so....". He then went to try and find someone else off the list--toward the end of the week he again mentioned that he needed me--much like my children I pretended like I didn't hear him--because if you don't actually hear the request it doesn't really count--Right? The poor guy resorted to sending me an e-mail to inform me that "I" was the chosen one--(i pretended that i hadn't read it) He inquired if i had checked my e-mail because now it was official--poor guy--i sorta blew his request off--chuckling under my breath the whole time. He then gave me the talk I was supposed to speak on Saturday night and told me i could have my choice of talks--some how I wasn't feeling it. I went to bed--I was tired, not knowing what i was going to speak on. My husband woke up the next morning and went to a meeting not knowing if i was really going to speak with him or not.(Poor guy--I really shouldn't have made him sweat) While he was gone i looked up some talks about some things i had been thinking about and formulated some ideas on what i would speak on. Nothing was really written down--I was not sure what direction I was really going in--I just knew I was going. My poor husband confided in me that he didn't actually know i was going to speak with him till i was walking out the door with him--I always knew i was--I guess i just like to see him sweat sometimes. So I gave my talk--I thought he had told me that i had 20 minutes--he said that he told me 12--anyway i took the 20 minutes plus 5 more i guess. I think i did OK. I had many people tell me that it was something that they needed to hear--and i thought that was it.....that it was over.
BUT.....
It wasn't.
There are times when you shouldn't do a good job speaking--like when a member of the stake presidency is sitting there and stake conference is coming up. YUP I got a call. I am one of the lucky ones that gets to speak in stake conference. I am feeling inadequate--nervous. I am wondering what i am supposed to say--what message i need to get across. All i can do is prepare and put the rest in the lords hands--that he will direct my thoughts to convey the message that needs to be given Saturday night. I will let you know if it works or not....

Easter at the Cabin

2010-04-04T18:05:00.000-07:00

Easter came early this year. I can't remember when the last time it fell over General Conference weekend. It worked out well.Usually we get together with my husbands family for Easter so, between being off on Good Friday, and being able to watch church/conference on Saturday and Sunday--we figured we could watch conference up at the cabin just as easy as we could at home. It was a grand weekend of wonderful weather and everyone was able to play between the sessions of conference. Even my married niece and nephew and their spouses were able to hang out with us. The only one that was missing was my dear nephew who was off serving his mission in New York. Here is Grandma with all the grandkids and even the grand-dogs. Since the kids were little we have always done an Easter egg hunt with the cousins. It seems to be something that no matter their age they have yet to outgrow. Even the married kids still want to participate. They teenagers are not so much interested in the candy these days, as they are the money and gift cards that are involved. This year Grandma had this idea, that instead of a normal Easter egg hunt, that we should have the kids break into pairs and do an Easter egg scavenger hunt around the property. She went out and scouted spots and then wrote up little rhymes to put in the eggs. It was quite the ordeal. We didn't want the kids to all have the same clues at the same time so we staggered the clues--it was crazy trying to get it all figured out and we took the majority of the evening before figuring how it would work out. The next day we sent the men out to "place" the eggs. We divided up the families so everyone was paired with a cousin--we didn't want the married couples cheating. They were each given their first clue and then they were off. At this point it was a little bit difficult to take pictures--everyone was moving so fast. The deer just stood by and watched

Even the pregnant girls were running around at the speed of light. the clues were scattered all over the 5 acre property once they found the clue they had to read it and figure out where their next location was some clues were easier to find than others--

some were hidden really well and some of the hints were a bit obscure. and then there were the kids that covered the eggs up so others would not find them.

One set of kids thought that they would just watch where others got their clues from and thought that would get them the prize--it didn't work the way they wanted.

They came in last.

but they still managed to muster up a smile

and had fun in the process.

Little man was having a good time finding his own eggs-- his only had candy--no clues involved for him

he was thrilled with the contents...so was the dog.

the dog kept hoping that a treat might be shared and find its way onto the ground.

Little man was not quite that generous

the first team came in and we proceeded to check their eggs... only to find that they were missing one. Then they had to figure out what clue they had missed. It was hilarious as i watched them run off-- in different directions--and then I heard my niece yelling my sons name as she sprinted the entire way to the last clue. (she was one of the pregnant ones)

They still came in first and with first place came the largest prize. second was close--but they were also missing an egg third place came in rather tired and exhausted from the ordeal

somehow i missed the fourth place team.

All in all I think a good time was had by all involved. The "adults" that sat and watched from the porch enjoyed the spectacle and i think the other adults that were running around had a grand time as well--although there were a few of them that were a tad bit sore the next day.

Definitely will go down in the books as one of the most memorable,

along with the one that took place in the pool-- ever been in a pool in April-- just a tad bit cold hard to believe those are some of the same kids in the other pictures-- like i said earlier, it doesn't matter how old they get-- they still love the hunt

Who are the people in your neighborhood???

2010-01-20T11:06:00.005-07:00

Yesterday one of my friends started a new grad class at school--
during it he was texting me--
apparently he was bored and the teachers monotone voice was doing nothing to engage him in the material--then all of a sudden i get a text saying
"She is quoting Mr. Rogers" as in the "It's a bea-ti-ful day in the Neighborhood", Mr. Rogers.
I just had to laugh--I loved Mr. Rogers
I have blogged about Mr. Rogers
and with that blog entry I won a book.
Mr. Rogers was an awesome neighbor
he spoke about being kind to one another
and treating each other with respect--
something i think society is lacking greatly in these days.

As with his song about the beautiful day in the Neighborhood there is another song about Neighborhoods--it has been stuck in my brain all day. At first i thought it was a Mr. Rogers song but then i realized i was channeling Sesame Street as i was singing it. Perhaps you might remember it
"Who are the people in you neighborhood,
in your neighborhood,
in your Neigh-BOR-hood.
Oh who are the people in you neighborhood,
the people that you meet
when your walking down the street,
the people that you meeeeet eaaachhh DAAAAYYYYYY."

I will have to apologize for my singing
we all know it is not my strong suit,
but you get the gist.

Now that i have this little diddy ingrained in your brain
i would like to talk about the people in my neighborhood.

I am the first to say i am not what i would call a GOOD neighbor
that doesn't necessary make me a bad neighbor,
just an INDIFFERENT neighbor.

I say that because in all honesty i really don't know my neighbors.
I will blame a lot of that on just being busy.
I don't even have time for the people I want to spend time with
even those that live in my house,
let alone those that are just living next to me.

Now i know the neighbors next to me are or were in college
they have smoked pot (not that i smelt it but once they called us asking us if we had some to sell--which of course we did NOT)
then there is the artist across the street
(he lets his dogs run loose)
Then right next to us we have had a rental home
we knew the people that owned it--they were young and nice and then they sold it
and since then it has had a variety of college kids inhabiting it.
It is hard to get to know them--
they are busy and had lots of sleepovers
so you never really knew who was actually living there.
I just know that they had parties that were annoying,
especially when they would block my drive way and the front of my house late at night...

So the college kids moved out and he house sat empty for a long time
and we really didn't mind--
in fact we liked having the extra driveway to park in
we thought it made the house looked "lived" in

Finally after the house sat empty for a year and a half
we had people move in--
and not the single, partying type of people
it was a FAMILY!
We were excited,
hopeful...
at least for the first few days...
fast forward to the weekend
and the first family gathering,
and pAr-tehhh
the party itself wasn't the problem--
or the cussing and swearing that took place
or the fighting
and cars squealing off--
it was the domestic abuse in the driveway that my children were privy to that i had a problem with. Call me crazy but i really don't want my kids to be exposed to that...
So the cops were called
and i must say i was impressed with their response time.
Not quite the first impression that i was hoping to have with my new neighbors
Here is hoping that things have no where to go but up?

Bad Dreams

2009-12-28T12:38:00.002-07:00

Dreams....
We all have had them at one time or another
Dreams that seem so real that when we wake up we are left wondering if it really happened or not.
I have had dreams where i have had entire conversations with someone only to find out that i really had not....
And then there are those BAD dreams
the ones that leave you cold
wondering if there is any truth to what you dreamed.
I have enjoyed watching the show Medium, although if i had her "gift", I am not sure i would want to go to sleep at night. There is something about the idea of dreaming of the dead and their sad stories that would keep me awake at night.

I remember when i was little i would have a re-occurring dream or nightmare as the case would be--especially for a little kid. To this day i remember the dream--odd as it was. Growing up in Colorado we had storm drains that were open on the curb side of the road and i was always afraid that i would fall into them--so i would go out of my way to avoid them when i was awake, but in my dreams it was a different story. I would dream that there were tar monsters (i think it goes back to when they would resurface the roads in the summer) and they lived in these drains. If you rode your bike (or trike in my case) over them they would grab you, roll you up into a tar ball and bowl you down the hill we lived on. Now i don't remember if they lived in all the storm drains--only the one across the street--
I would wake up scared and it would stay with me--and it kept me on my side of the street--away from the storm drain, just in case there was any truth to this dream i had i didn't want to find out.

Another dream/nightmare i remember having was when i was in my early 20's and working at the wave pool. I would dream about work...that in itself was not so bad but me dreaming i was handcuffed to the grates in the deep end of the wave pool seemed a bit too real when i woke up. I would dream that when the waves would start i could almost get a breath of air when the wave would crest on the other side of me--the word was almost. I don't think it is a healthy thing for a lifeguard to dream about drowning--it creeped me out and seemed real enough that i would NOT go near those grates under any circumstance--EVER

So those are the bad dreams that i can remember--i know i have had others--like the naked at work dreams, or the being chased by a murderer, or the classic falling--but none of my dreams have ever come true--THANK GOODNESS--until now.....

I dreamed on Christmas day that my husbands company called him up and told him that they were coming by to pick up his car and that he no longer had a job--OOOOOHHH the chills when i woke up. It left me cold...wondering...and then i thought this is silly--Hubby has a job--it is Christmas--laugh it off--so i did. I even told my hubby--we laughed at it, because it was just a dream--RIGHT????

WRONG !!!

Little did i know when i shared my nightmare with my husband on Christmas that it would only take a few days for it to come to fruition. I was out shopping and doing returns today when i got a call from my hubby that put my heart in my stomach. He told me in a rather stern manner (which made me mad) "STOP SHOPPING AND QUIT SPENDING MONEY" were his exact words. I thought "what is his problem?" and i even said that--He then replied "They just called from work and are laying me off and coming to get the car" I had a huge pit in my stomach and those words stopped me in my tracks. It was so similar to my dream/nightmare i had had just a few days prior.

We have been in this boat before--in fact only a few months ago and i had no idea that we would be here again so quickly. My hubby is torqued and so am I. We feel betrayed. We were willing to be loyal to them but we see how it is now days--you really do need to look out for yourself and do what is best for you. I hate that attitude--it is so selfish--but before we commit to another company we are gonna want to make sure that they have our back as well....at least enough to give us a heads up or warning that things are not all rosy...

Speaking of roses...

Did i mention our anniversary is tomorrow?--for better or worse--and i guess this is just part of the worse we get to endure together. I know things can always get worser (not sure that is a word but it works for me) we are healthy, we have a roof over our heads, good kids and the support of each other--a job is doable--we will get through this together--now i only hope that i will have a good dream...one that has him getting a really GOOD job....
--SOON.

Get Away...a new found freedom

2009-12-22T00:02:00.001-07:00

It goes without being said that I have been on a bit of a blog hiatus—even my non-blogging friend (although she has been known to read them on occasion) can tell me when my last entry was….yes it has indeed been awhile. Much has happened—mostly life has just been busy. I used to wonder when life would return to normal—I have since figured out that BUSY is my normal. I know it will not always be like this, that this is a phase that will pass but for now I am trying to enjoy every minute of it.

It is almost Christmas which means this year is coming to an end...quickly!
I used to love Christmas, the presents, the anticipation, all the decorating.
This year I have been wishing that Christmas came at a different time of year—
say, like June.
I don’t think I am near as busy in June, although it is much warmer that time of year which does not invoke the pictures of a white Christmas—not that it is ever an option living in Phoenix but others might miss it. My December finds every weekend occupied with sitting in gyms watching my children wrestle. It is fun. It is exciting and sometimes it is frustrating, but we love it. Sometimes I feel like we are sacrificing all the Christmas stuff in order to support them in their endeavors—that is why I am thinking June would be better—they are out of school and we need something to keep them busy.RIGHT?

When my kids were little many parents of teenagers would make the comment “You think you are busy now, just wait until they are in high school. I would think to myself, “really how much busier can it be?” I thought I was pretty busy chasing after kids, finding activities to occupy their time, and keeping them out of trouble. I am not sure when it actually changed, but it has. Now they find things to occupy their time, which often involves me driving or supporting them. I no longer control who they play with or choose to spend their time with. When they were little it felt like they were going to be little forever and I didn’t truly realize in the midst of all the daily life how quickly they would be growing up…..and leaving.(sorta)

I have yet to have one actually leave home, she is still hanging around and I love it. Having “older” kids is such a blessing. She has been able to step in and play the role of chauffer and person in charge (I dare say parent because the siblings don’t obey her like they do us) Years ago we had friends that were BYU alumni and they would often fly off to the games leaving their teenagers in charge. It seemed like such a foreign idea, the idea of packing up and leaving for a few days just on a whim? When they were little, the idea of running away sounded wonderful sometimes….but you can’t do that when they are little, somehow they can always find you…even if I was just hiding in the bathroom (not really hiding just with the door shut for a brief moment but they thought I was hiding) Getting away with the hubby involved planning even if it was just for a few hours let alone an evening.
My how things have changed.
Cell phones have helped immensely in the ability to get away. You can be out the door and down the block and still within reach. It was a liberating moment when we were able to go to the movies leaving the oldest in charge for a few hours. After that moment there was no looking back, we had transitioned into some new found freedoms with kids. Originally we limited the cooking, answering the phone and even opening the door to anyone. As they have gotten older and more competent those things have gone by the wayside. A few hours became long days, and finally overnight.

My husband was playing in a annual golf tournament and wanted me to attend with him. I started making arrangements for grandma to come over and stay overnight with the kids. My oldest stated “mom, we can take care of ourselves.” It got me thinking…..Hmmmmm. Could they? Would everything be fine? Then it came down to worse case scenario... we would only be 2 ½ hours away and the grandma’s were both in town, and one lives around the corner if they really needed anything fast. It was then decided that we could indeed embark on this new found freedom….and we have, with very little looking back. This weekend we decided that since I would be busy working on our actual anniversary that is coming up, that I would go with my hubby on his business trip to Vegas. We packed our bags, threw everything in the car and with a wave and a “see ya later” we were out the door and on our way enjoying our new found freedom. It is such a bittersweet feeling to know that you have reached the point in your life where your kids are capable of taking care of themselves and you are not necessary for their every need. It is bittersweet to know that in a few years there might not be anyone around to say “see ya” to…but for now I am going to appreciate those kids that are trustworthy and responsible enough to be left behind, and appreciate the cell phone so they can still call when they have a question, not that they need my answer but just the fact that they value it.

Got Blood?

2009-11-12T15:17:00.001-07:00

My son reached a milestone today. He gave his first pint of blood. It should have been a rather uneventful event, and for the most part, it was. The giving part went just fine. I suggested to him that he might want to take it easy at wrestling practice in the afternoon but he informed me that he was going to be giving in the morning and he would “BE FINE!” In his ever wise teenage wisdom what did I really know??? I am just the mom after all, not to mention having had life teaching experiences, especially when it has come to giving blood.

Years ago, I thought I was "fine" shortly after giving blood, and I jumped in the car and was off. Shortly there after, I felt the overcoming feeling of darkness over me. Luckily I was able to pull over before I actually did pass out, but it made for a scary afternoon (all before cell phones were available to contact someone) I explained this to him and told him he might be tired. Again his response was “I’ll be fine”, so I gave up trying to convince him otherwise, he sometimes can be a rather stubborn kid (I have NO idea where he gets that characteristic from)

I went to pick him up from wrestling practice that afternoon. He then informed me that prior to practice he had taken off the compression bandage that they had taped him up with after giving blood. He had felt fine and was working out with his partner when he noticed some blood on him. Blood in the wrestling room is not such an unusual thing, so he started looking at his partner thinking it was coming from him. It wasn’t. My son checked his nose—nope, wasn’t him either, or so he thought. Upon further examination he looked at his arm and in his words it was SPURTING. He told me, “Mom there was blood all over the mat and my shirt was covered in it.” He headed off to the trainers office where she had him dispose of his shirt treating it as a hazardous material. She got him taped up and told him to take it easy….he listened to her????

09/09/09

2009-09-09T20:08:00.004-07:00

i feel like this date warrants something to be said
something profound
and yet....
I got nuthin'!
My brain is a void of anything notable or noteworthy
so instead you will get my ramblings
and even though i have nothing of real insight to say i do want it stated that i do know how to spell "nothing"....so onto my thoughts...all 9 of them to celebrate 9/9/09

1. Sometimes Taco Bell just tastes good--but not the second time around--
2. Why do i feel the need to have a glass of water at my bedside every night and yet i rarely ever drink it?
3. It is a good thing that gum doesn't really stay in your body for 7 years--i am a gum swallower--I try not to be--but i can't help it. I haven't checked to make sure it really does comes out but at this point if it didn't,the whole of my insides would be white gooey sticky stuff if that wives tale were true
4.I love the smell of a new bus--similar to a new car smell but on a much larger scale--(and i don't have to pay for it)although today a girl said that my new bus smelled like bologna and old leather--does that equate to new bus smell, I am not sure?
5. My kids just crack me up--they are growing into neat people...
6. With that being said about my kids why does their personal belief and reality of the moment differ so much when progress reports come out? And why am i the bad guy when i get upset about less than adequate grades
7. And on the similar subject--when did it become politically correct to give a kid an "E" instead of calling it what it is--an "F" as in "failing"--is an "E" supposed to make us feel better about the grade since it is one letter closer to a D?
8.I love to brush my teeth in the shower--feel like i can give them a much better scrub in there than over the sink--i don't know why--just do
9.i am sitting next to my youngest punk in dis-belief that he will be 8 years old tomorrow--why is this so hard to believe? In some ways it seems like we have been dealing with him and his issues F-O-R-E-V-E-R and that he has always been here--and then on the other hand his is still so young and learning new things. Just tonight he put on his pajama pants by himself--not a big deal for a "normal" 8 year old--but he is anything but "normal". In 8 short years he has made me stop and appreciate the little things--so many little things that i took for granted. Even with all his issues i am so thankful that he became the caboose for our family--

now that is notable, noteworthy and profound--and if i really wanted to i could ramble on for hours about this kid and the joy he gives me and our family, but i won't...I will save that for his birthday.

familiar smells

2009-08-12T09:04:00.007-07:00

Years ago I was somewhere where they poised the question

"If you had to give up one of your senses which one would you give up?"

As i sat and pondered that question i could not really come up with one that i would willingly want to give up. Each one holds such an importance to me and while there are times i do take them for granted I am equally thankful that i have each one of them.

There is no way i would want to give up sight--I love to see the beauty and color around me--
Hearing allows you to communicate and hear the small soft sounds of nature--and touch....I love texture and am such a hands on person--one of my favorite things to do is make bread and feel it in my hands--or dig in the garden and run my hands through the soil. The there is Taste--uMMMMM--NO WAY--we all know how i love food--i would rather not eat than eat bad food--and taste goes with SMELL--when you can't smell, food it does not taste as good. Now there are times when you would prefer NOT to smell something but through smell it makes you aware of your surroundings. I have found that often smell is something that invokes memories. It is amazing how you associate certain smells with a place or a person or even the most random of memories...there was always a smell of evergreens at my grandmothers house--when i catch a whiff of that it brings back such a flood of memories. Some smells remind you of the Holidays--some remind you of a meal that was shared--and some remind you of when your children were little (those tend to be the smells we want to forget) and then when i am with my brothers there are smells that remind me of road trips-(again not the pleasant smell you really want to remember)

“Smell is a potent wizard

that transports you across thousands of miles

and all the years you have lived."

Helen Keller

Yesterday as I was driving I had the windows open and i caught a smell--the most random of memories came back with this smell. In my mind it was the smell of death...OK maybe that is an extreme description but allow me to explain--because in reflecting back and knowing me now i am surprised i even had anything to do with this. I am not one who likes reptiles, or fish or amphibians and even birds freak me out--i can swim in a lake or stream or ocean as long as i don't see what is swimming around me and especially if i NEVER come in contact with said animals--I do not like to touch fish unless it comes cleaned and filleted from the store. I can not or better spoken WILL NOT hold a snake,lizard or frogs--they just creep me out--I can look at them through glass but even then i am not getting too close--so with that being said I am shocked i had anything to do with tadpoles as a kid. We lived near a large open field that was great for bike riding and exploring and digging huge holes and when the rains came there was a pond and in this pond lived---you guessed it tadpoles. We (my little bro and I) filled and entire wagon full of tadpoles and brought it home. Did i not know that all those tadpoles would become frogs--did my mom have any clue that her backyard was going to be overtaken with hopping amphibians in a few short weeks? Or i should say would have been taken over if we hadn't gone on vacation...there is this thing called evaporation that doesn't bode well for a metal wagon filled with thousands of tadpoles....when we came home from vacation and went to check on our tadpoles and to see if any had mad the transformation to frog hood, we found instead there was this SMELL--the same smell i smelled yesterday--the one of dehydrated tadpoles caked on the inside of a wagon--I am pretty sure that was not exactly what i was smelling yesterday but boy did it brings back the memories of that carnage as a child. I remember that we never quite used that wagon again...there are certain smells that just don't come out--even when scrubbed many times....

“You're only here for a short visit.
Don't hurry, don't worry.
And be sure to smell
the flowers along the way.”
Walter Hagen

the second first day

2009-08-11T11:47:00.000-07:00

How can it be the first if it is actually the second?
Rather deep question...
--it is all in the perspective--
especially the perspective of the parent...
I am the outsider
--the observer--
the watcher and document keeper
and more often than not
--the picture taker....
but not this year, that job was relegated to the hubby.
He sent the next wave of kids off to their first day of school
First was the son in middle school

and then this cute punk was off--he loves the structure that school brings
These boys are the bus riders of the family and while i love the fact that their transportation is provided, freeing a bit of time up for me--i do miss the opportunity to be confined with my young teen to talk. Somehow when you are in the confines of a car there seems to be more opportunity to just chat--seems like i can focus on them and not the 50million things going on around me.

Since i have to get little man out of school early several days a week for therapy I still get the chance to chat with him. Unfortunately since he does not speak in complete sentences, I usually end up carrying on the majority of the conversation--
which at first is exciting too him--thinking he doesn't actually have to talk
and then he realized that he won't get a word in anyway
I am hoping that eventually he will carry his end of the conversation....

If there were no schools
to take the children away from home
part of the time,
the insane asylums would be filled
with mothers.
~Edgar W. Howe

first day of HIGHSCHOOL

2009-08-10T08:52:00.004-07:00

What can I say??? The summer has flown by and i have been too busy/tired to blog--where did the time go? Truly i don't know--i can't remember other years going by so fast. I have heard it said that as your kids get older time moves faster--AND IT DOES--so much faster.

So today is the FIRST of three "first day's of school" in our house this year. I will have 5 kids at 5 different schools--two in two different high schools that started today--two in the elementary district that starts tomorrow and then the newest addition is college. When did i get old enough to have a child in college--i will just pretend she is one of those really bright 12 year old (instead of 19) that way i won't seem so old--it's all perception anyway.

This also marks a milestone in that i wasn't here to see them off this year--It was sad to me that i missed taking the kids pictures--but their dad was here so he got the privilege of taking their pictures and running them around--just one of the joys of being unemployed.

Here is the newest freshman in our house--she recently gave 12inches to locks of love--hence the new short hair

she is the my third child to be starting highschool--I am over half way done with this milestone. She will be attending the same high school her sister just graduated from and will start swimming with the high school team this afternoon--just when you think you are free of something, you get sucked back in.

Then there is this cute punk
He is attending the same highschool his dad went to--which is a different one than the daughter
not only is he not really excited about the first day of school
but his birthday is also today--poor kid
who knew that having an early August birthday would have it coincide with the first day of school--he could get his license today--but isn't--he has some more to do with his eagle and nothing beats time and experience behind the wheel. Hard to believe he is halfway through high school and he will be a junior this year--

like I said earlier time really does move faster when your kids get older

"The only reason for time
is so that everything doesn't happen at once.”

Albert Einstein

the first one is OFF

2009-06-12T19:53:00.004-07:00

I have been off the "blog" lately. Not only have i not been posting--i haven't been reading either. It is amazing how every ones lives went on without me lurking into them. I have missed those updates on my friends. I have missed writing about those things that i have been doing and thinking--but before i could start my entry tonight i felt the need to "catch up" on others lives. As i was reading it really made me think about what i was going to write about anyway--just how quickly life moves and things change.

Today my oldest flew the coop--literally. As of a few minutes ago a large plane took off carrying my daughter to a part of the world i have never been.

I am happy for her but at the same time i am feeling a bit of jealousy and sadness. Jealous because i wish i was going--I love an adventure and am so glad she is getting one at this time in her life but am sad that i am not there to experience it with her. I hope she takes LOTS of great pictures and keeps a good journal so years from now she will remember the details....

As i was sending her off today i couldn't help but reflect on other milestones where i sent her off on new adventures. The first one came at 18 months when she went to nursery--. The first time i had to take her into nursery she cried. As soon as she thought i was out of earshot she quit crying. She wanted me to think that she needed me--but she didn't, she was fine...

Then my daughter became shy--painfully shy, as in "i won't even talk to my grandparents" kind of shy. I had no idea where she got that characteristic from--but she had it and it worried me. I was concerned how she would do when she went off to school. We went ahead and started her in kindergarten just after she turned 5, she said she wanted to go--so we let her. Letting the first one go is hard--especially when you think they need you--I soon found out, she didn't. Off she went without so much as a glance back at me. The only tears that were coming that day were from the corners of my eyes. She bounded into that kindergarten room with confidence--and a few days later when she had the opportunity to change classes she did it--again without any issues.

She has continually surprised me at how she handles new situations. In middle school when she was held back she really grew and blossomed. She gained confidence in meeting new friends.She always seems to make friend with those who are new or visiting. Somewhere along the line she has welcomed all into her "Box". Now that doesn't mean she likes to step out of it--she likes the safety of her box--she doesn't feel the need to venture out of the box just for the sake of adventure. Once again she is willingly embarking on another new situation and new friends. She is going into this adventure not knowing anyone--this whole thing is unfamiliar, and yet she is embracing this trip with a smile on her face and light in her eyes.

I can only imagine the experiences she will be having--all without me to see it transpire. Today as i hugged her goodbye she gave me that same confidence that she had in kindergarten

--the one that said

"I will be fine mom--and don't let the door hit you in the butt"

again i was the one left there standing as she went off...

without so much as a look back

with tears in my eyes

...some things don't change....

good times with the grandparents

2009-05-25T22:18:00.001-07:00

My daughter came in all buzzed tonight--
you could tell she had a good time.
"Guess what i ate?" She asked in her bubbly life is good attitude.
Knowing that she had been at her grandparents
i knew it must have been something yummy--
"Meatballs?" i said
"NOOOOO"she responded with indignation
--personally I thought it had been a good guess
"How about popcorn" (grandpa is known for mastering the proper amounts of real butter and salt to make a wonderful bowl of greasy goodness)
"NOPE--mom you are not very good at this guessing game"
Child, give me a break--the options are endless as to what you could have eaten--
she did take pity on me and gave me a clue
"It is something that you shouldn't eat because it might cause you to have a heart attack and since you already have a bad heart....."
"Could it have been Heart attack french toast?"
"YEP--and it was really good"
they say the way to a man's heart is through his stomach--
they failed to mention that it works for grand kids as well....
Where will my children go when they need a snack this summer--
or someone to spoil them?
--it will be a long three months with the grandparents gone....

the bench

2009-05-24T20:35:00.005-07:00

We are such creatures of habit--
I like the familiar the routine...
I do things the same way because it just "feels right"
When it comes to church on Sunday
I like to drive the same way--
park in the same area
enter in the same set of doors
and after many years we now have a bench.
We have found that in our building we do not fit on the side benches--
just too many of us and the butts are too big for all of us to fit on the side so we are relegated to the middle benches.
Somehow we have one that we have marked as "ours"
I don't know when it happened...it just did
Today when i came it my husband was already sitting down
and we were just one row back from our normal bench--
it felt weird--
first of all we were displacing the family that normally sat behind us
(at the time i did not know that they were not there today)
it had a different view--
just strange that's all....

As i was reflecting on my bench situation i realized that sooner than later we would be able to fit on a side bench. Our days of my whole family attending church together is limited--
my bench will be thinning out in the years to come.
I hadn't really thought about the fact as my children graduate that they also move onto another ward--a ward without their family sitting with them.
I remember other families with full benches not too long ago--
and now i see them sitting as empty Nester's...
Is this what i have to look forward to?
It won't be too many years before we can fit on the side bench again--
just another change...
another adjustment--
that i will be making before i know it.

bitter sweet transition

2009-05-21T23:48:00.005-07:00

today was a day of transitions--
this was a day that i felt was far away
and now it is here.
Where did the time go--
did i blink? like the song says--
and years pass before i even realized it?
My middle child is now a high school freshman

just as i have one leaving another one starts-- and so the circle continues for the next few years--
in two years the next punk will be graduating and hopefully leaving on a mission shortly there after. and then the next two in tow...
moving all too quickly for my liking.
Was it only four short years ago i was discussing this day with my son just after i had dropped the oldest off for her first day of high school--I remember getting teary eyed at the idea of how quickly this time would fly and now here it is?!
Bittersweet transition....
something that we have been working towards...
I made the mistake and blinked
and now it leaves me with tears in my eyes and an ache in my heart--

rain or shine it's graduation time

2009-05-21T22:15:00.003-07:00

this week has been a blur--
one HOT blur--
until today that is.
We had eighth grade promotion this morning--

it was a lovely albeit cool morning--
a pleasant surprise given the last week or so of 100+ degree days
I was hoping that the cloud cover would stay around

so when it came time for graduation it would not be ridiculously hot--
MY WISH WAS GRANTED
the only problem was--
with that wish of cloud cover

came some side effects--
like in the form of RAIN--

When was the last time it actually rained in Arizona--
HMMMM--don't know and can't remember
it has been awhile....
We have had a dry spring
and because of the lack of rain

we haven't had alot blooming which i am thankful for.
It had been drizzling lightly

and then ten minutes before it was due to start

the heavens opened up and the rain came pouring down

and here came the graduates--i actually was able to pick out my daughter and her semi wavy hair (it had been curled but rain has the effect of straightening it) She was able to pick us out of the crowd and gave us a cute wave acknowledging the fact we were sitting in the rain
and then the graduation ceremony continued on--as if rain was an everyday occurrence.
Notice how wet the track is...Did the principal cut her talk short--UMMMM--NOOOO. She had to acknowledge all the important people by name that were sitting in the rain with the rest of us--at that point--WHO CARED?--Let's just get on with it already Finally the moment came of the actual diplomas being given came. There were teachers there to help the girls up the ramp
and teachers to help them down--lest they take a spill. Her anatomy/physiology teacher was there to help her down and gave her a bad time about wearing heels in the rain and she still managed to make it back to her seat in one piece-no worse for the wear just a tad bit wet as the case maybe. Maybe they should have been wearing rain panchos instead of gowns.

It is a good thing that with swimming for all those years she has practiced the wet look--and has it down--even looks cute....

her aunt and uncle braved the weather with us--they are half way done with their graduations-
last year their sons was moved inside because of the weather--who would think two years in a row that this would be an issue

and then come rain of shine grandma is always there for her grand kids

and finally both of us got in a picture together with our first born
--our first graduate.
Even without the rain--
this will soon be an evening that will NOT be forgotten

eighth grade promotion

2009-05-21T10:34:00.001-07:00

This is an Arizona tradition I have never understood,
but i just go along with it.
I don't understand how or why it was ever started,
but for some reason they feel the need to continue on with this tradition.
I guess it had gotten out of hand many years ago with limos and expensive dresses and people making such a big deal out of it that they have tried to scale it down--
and scale it down they have....
right back into the classroom.
My other two that have "promoted" atleast they did it in the cafeteria--
and there was a stage and speeches....
about 30 minutes worth of a program...
This child got a speech read from the principal

and a very nice talk from her teacher on how to succeed in high school,
and it was said that the reason they were going to the small classroom situation was so they could give more personal attention to the students...
somehow we failed to see any of that actually transpire--
names were read and certificates were given with no mention of additional awards--like those given for grades
photo op's were limited...

we did manage to have her poise with each of us--just to let her know how proud we are of her.
Call us crazy but we expect our kids to go onto high school--we have never felt that a celebration was called for just because you completed 8th grade---
but we don't want to be the loser parents who don't show up when everyone else is there--but is it really worth taking work off for such an uneventful thing--for 15 minutes of being crammed into a hot classroom? I say "just do away with the whole thing"...but that is just my opinion...Although if they had done away with it, I would not have gotten this picture of her

Meet the newest McClintock freshman...doesn't look like an 8th grader anymore--
goodbye uniforms hello regular cute clothes....

Seminary graduation--just another excuse for a new dress

2009-05-20T21:30:00.003-07:00

We went looking for a new dress for High School graduation....
and we found a basic black one and then this one in less than 30 minutes...
imagine our surprise when we found this cute number for cheap...
and the shoes to go with it for cheap also...
(sometimes i just love Ross)

The sweater she already had--it went perfect
The necklace was new--that was her graduation present...
My mother in law asked if it was real--as in diamonds....
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
I love this child and all and am proud of her--
but she will have to find a sugar daddy
to buy her diamonds like that...

she liked how tall the shoes made her

she liked the fact that she was as tall as her dad
(which isn't that hard to do)

and i liked the fact that she could actually walk in them

for a child not always known for her grace--she has come a long way...
I love her air of confidence and sassy-ness...
and i love the fact that as i held my breath when she got her award
--that she did not trip with those tall shoes....
she continues to make me proud...

Seminary graduation

2009-05-20T20:55:00.004-07:00

Another milestone moment of this week.
We had the opportunity to see my daughter receive acknowledgement for the four years of seminary attendance that she participated in.
What a blessing those four years have been.
I have seen her knowledge of the scriptures increase
and her testimony of the savior grow.
She has a good foundation of why she is here...
and her purpose on earth.
She has been taught the things that will bring her everlasting happiness--
she chose to graduate.
We did encourage her to fit seminary in her schedule--
but ultimately attending was her choice.
I know it gave her balance to her crazy high school days
and i am grateful for the time she spent out of the "world"
--even it was for only an hour a day.
I am grateful for her encouragement of daily scripture reading.
I know the things that she was taught will help her as she goes out in the world--
and that in times of trouble she will be able to reflect back on them,
and they will help her in making life's choices.
I am grateful and proud that she stuck it out--
saw it through
and chose to finish....

End of the year dread

2009-05-19T21:10:00.003-07:00

Sometimes i feel a bit dense.
In my mind i know that something is going to occur--
and yet it doesn't seem real--
I know that this is the last week of school and yet i think i am in denial--
until today and for some reason it just hit me--
that it really IS the last week of school.
Not even the last week, we are actually down to just days...
It is not that i don't love having my kids home for summer vacation--
i totally enjoy the relaxed pace that summer brings--
i don't dig the heat that the summer brings but we have learned to adjust.
I think i dread the last week of school because all the routine we have know all year is over--
we have to re-adjust...
I think i dread the last week of school because that means another school year is over
which means my kids are advancing another year
they are getting older
they are moving on
and sometimes i just want time to stand still...
so i guess that is where my denial comes in--
if you don't acknowledge it--it doesn't happen...
Right?
Well maybe not--
at least in my mind it does slow down the process just a bit....

cat in the backyard

2009-05-18T10:33:00.000-07:00

There are CAT people and there are DOG people
and a few can manage to love them both in harmony.
We are dog people...
cats are not even an option in our home.
I do not like cats that come into my yard--
or cats that creep along the top of my fence just to antagonize my dogs.
And i really DO NOT like the cats that choose to squeeze into my attic and have cat fights in the middle of the night--OHH...the screams....
and I really do not like the fact that a cat chose my attic to die in right before we went on vacation--leaving us a awful stench to come home to
(thank you dear hubby for taking care of the body removal)
With all that being said---when a cat decided to have kittens in our shed and abandon them--
i did bottle feed them and found them homes...
No animal deserves to be born just to starve to death--not even a cat.
If they would stay kittens i might consider liking them--
but they don't....
and some cats have just liked to terrorize me
But i am here to say that i was thrilled at this CAT in my yard

I think it is a TOM-CAT and he is welcome anytime he wants to make improvements

girlfriend time

2009-05-16T23:52:00.000-07:00

I call it work--
and it is--

REALLY it is....

I promise that it is NOT all fun and games...

but fun and games are had when you are with the your girlfriend.

I love this part of my job--
the girlfriend time--

even though miles separate us normally
all is forgotten when we are together...
we just enjoy the moments for what they are
FLEETING

new bracelet

2009-05-16T21:50:00.004-07:00

If you know me
you know i am not about the "bling".
When it comes to my jewelry i am a pretty simple girl
i like my bracelets--
jangling,fun bracelets.
While at the show this weekend a woman had some bracelets that she had made from old typewriter keys--very fun novel idea.
i found myself pulled to this one....

I loved the message
LIFE IS GOOD
I do believe that
especially that night---after i had lost my wallet with my ID and credit cards, cash, room key--my life essentially--I was in a panic--how was i going to get onto the plane? About the time when i was really stressed i found out that it had been turned into the hotel front desk--with everything still intact--cash and all.
LIFE WAS GOOD--i believe that more know than ever, and am so grateful that i now have something to remind me of that fact
Then upon closer examination i had to laugh
for the typewriter key that was chosen before the word good

i guess on some days life IS only 1/4 good--but that is still good, and then those days it can be 1/2 good---I guess they don't make a 100% key and that is not very realistic anyway--i will take this bracelet and cherish it and the memories that surround it--

LIFE IS GOOD--just one more thing to remind me of the fact

I think the next bracelet will say SO BLESSED....

Oh funny story--after i got the bracelet i was showing it to my girlfriend and she made the comment that you could tell the keys came from different typewriters since some of them were shaped different than others--like the two "O's" for instance--in which i reminded her that they would have to be from different typewriters since no typewriter had two O keys--we laughed at this blond moment...maybe you had to be there....maybe you had to be sleep deprived...but we were cracking up.....

veklempt

2009-05-15T23:32:00.001-07:00

i don't know if i spelled my title right or not and since it is a Yiddish word i believe-trying to find it proved interesting. It is amazing the things you find when you Google words

My oldest called me this afternoon--just a normal day i thought
I was working at the convention when i got the call....
"Mom, I am done with school"
this was not an unusual statement--
often she would call me to tell me she was home and done for the day...
but today it was different....
the meaning was different...
"I am done with High school" she said.
All of a sudden--standing among many woman i got teary eyed
VEKLEMPT--
i could barely speak.
It had hit me like a ton of bricks
memories came flooding through my mind
and i realized she had grown up
She was done--she was moving on to bigger and better things
This milestone had come and gone
a door had been shut
and there i stood looking at it with tears in my eyes....

Manchester time difference

2009-05-14T20:09:00.002-07:00

Does my butt look smaller? Wait....you can't see it--(because after the last picture that i posted of it....I am not going there again.) I am going to say "yes it does!"--why you ask--well i worked it off today. I am tired--It is actually after 11pm here--but my Arizona clock says 8pm--still too early for me to actually fall asleep....although i need to try since the morning will come three hours earlier than i am used to also--like i will be getting up at 4am my time--I NEVER get up at 4am....i just love the time difference.

Mothers day

2009-05-10T22:18:00.006-07:00

Mothers day...the day for all children to be perfect and honor their perfect mothers--
and somehow the rest of us horn in on this holiday. In fact for most of us, mothers day is a day where we feel inadequate, inferior and just bad at this job of mothering. But with that being said you can't have mothers day and not write something about it.

I have been blessed with a wonderful mother--she also hated/disliked mothers day. Maybe i get some of my dislike for the day from her--maybe it is a genetic thing--I remember her crying on many a mothers day, and feeling less than "perfect"--what she didn't realize at the time--we were also less than "perfect"--but she was the PERFECT mom for us. None of us is perfect--we just do the best job we can with what we have been given. She was there after school to chat and she fed us well--and we all have a love of food, different food from different countries. She taught us to be honest and not play games--was she perfect NO--but once again neither were we. She taught many a lifes lessons to us--and while dating she was always spot on in her evaluations of the guys i brought home--plus she did help in choosing my hubby for me...

Then can i spend a moment talking about my mother in law? I realize i am in the minority here in saying that i genuinely love and adore this woman. She is amazing. I know without a doubt that the man i married is a direct reflection of the job she did--with very little help from his father. He is the man before me because of her. She is soooo supportive of her grand kids and sets such a great example for them of the importance of family...

My kids love their grandmas--these pictures are just from this week

After the orchestra concert with the middle child Seeing the oldest off to another prom--my mom was there helping stitch on the zebra trim and hubbies mom was entertaining the date while he was waiting. And how can you not love the fact that the grandma's were color coordinated

The also saw the oldest son off to prom as well--but we missed the photo op with them

This boy however loves to get his picture taken--and he loves his grandma's

we went out to dinner and he had to hold both of their hands as we were walking in--he is an equal opportunity love bug

And since i am a mother i need to mention my day--yummy breakfast before church-- and a great nap after church, only to wake up and have the wonderful smells of dinner wafting down to me. And while all of this was great--i couldn't help but look down the bench at church and reflect on how my kids are growing up--how my mothering of some of them is getting less and less. How i can no longer just hug or kiss a wound away. With the exception of my youngest the rest don't snuggle with me much anymore. They are all so independent--and that is a good thing-but it is also nice to feel needed. My middle child was off to Disneyland this weekend for school and got back at 6am this morning. She was tired and asked if she had to go to church--(that was a no brain-er answer) and normally i don't like them to sleep through services--but how could i resist when she asked if she could rest her head on my shoulder--she needed me. I sat there with my arm around her--with my daughter snuggled in the crook of shoulder. It has been years since she snuggled up with me--that my friends was the highlight of my day--i was needed--even if was only for a shoulder to lean on--AHHH what a wonderful mothers day memory....

It kills you to see them grow up.

But I guess it would kill you quicker

if they didn't.

~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams

bad blogger apology

2009-05-09T06:43:00.003-07:00

last May i posted 43 times--
Somehow with it being the 9th day in May, and this being my second post of the month--
I don't think i am on pace to tie that amount this year.
I have been a bad blogger--
not that i don't have MANY things to write about--
for heavens sake--
it is MAY
the time of year for all things busy with kids
and to boot i even have one graduating--
LOTS and lots of things to write about--
but i haven't.
I am sorry....
I will try to be better--
maybe even catch up
but...
NO promises that it will actually happen...