MIA

I have missed you my baby blue background ed blog.
I have missed checking up on my friends in cyber-space
and I have missed writing...
I feel like my brain has become mush
with very few creative thoughts coming from it these days.
Have I mentioned "these days?"
Why no i haven't..
Why?
Because these days finds me BUSY,
BUSY
BUSY.
I have always felt like i was busy,
but I guess I have been wrong,
or maybe the busy is different.
Yeah, I think that is it.
My busy as of late has consisted of the NEED to work.
I have always worked but it is different now.
My family is now dependent on me working--
for things that in the past that we sorta took for granted
like food,
air conditioning
and a roof over our heads--
just the everyday things of life,
that normally i don't think twice about not having,
but we do still have
because i am blessed with a job.
A job that makes me tired.
A job where i am working more hours than ever before...
but thankful for the job and the pay non the less.

I always said that we could never support our family on what i made
and we aren't--(thankful for the meager unemployment)
and other blessings that have come our way...
Dear hubby and i were talking the other day about our finances...
amazing how a year ago we could not have even fathomed getting by on what we are
maybe this is the lesson we are to learn from this trial--
truly the more you have
the more you spend,
and what were we spending it on???
We decided that we are now in a position to take a job
that does not have the income we were accustomed too--
I mean if we have to and all...
and if someone would offer....
but in the mean time i will continue to burn the candle at both ends
and one of these days i might even manage to come up with a creative thought or two,
and maybe even manage to find the time and energy to put the words down on my blog.

Don't give up on me.
I need your support and PRAYERS more now than ever.

just me ranting...

The anticipation is killing me
(not really)
I am sick of my life
(sorta)
I am tired of being patient
(definitely)
and this thing called FAITH
can be wearing at times....
And yet somehow,
someway,
I find a reason to get up in the morning--
which just for the sake of argument
is MUCH earlier than i would normally be getting up or want to get up at,
and yet i do--without an alarm!

Waiting can be tiring--
so I guess i should be glad that i have something to keep me busy
even if it does require that i am working out in the heat--
doing a nasty job--
one that i would not be doing except for the fact
that you do,
what you have to do,
to make ends meet...
and i am thankful that our ends have been meeting,
that i have a job
(even if i am not loving/liking it right now)
I am thankful for the food we have to eat
I am thankful for the roof over my head
that we are all basically healthy
cars to drive
AIR CONDITIONING
I am thankful for a loving husband
and his desire to find a job
Now if someone else could see that and offer him one i would be really
THANKFUL...
and yes i am thankful for this trial
I am learning about strength
and more lessons on PATIENCE
than i really care for...
but...
I also know that this is not
FOREVER...
because FOREVER is a mighty long time
and i mean to tell you...
LET'S GO CRAZY
(Oops sorry about the prince reference)
but seriously,
sometimes i feel like this is how it has always been
how quickly we can forget
I guess that is why we are given trials
to remind us that we are NOT alone
to remind us to have FAITH
and with that faith comes PEACE
and i do have PEACE...
I don't know why I am at peace?
why i am not all stressed out?
but i just know that things will (eventually) be OK!
and I am OK with that
although i would like a magic 8 ball to confirm it--
but in lieu of the magic 8 ball i will accept a call from my hubby
(who is at a job interview in Cali)
just telling me that he did well--
telling me he had a job offer would be even better
but i will continue to work on that thing called
PATIENCE....
for a know that one day soon that call will come....
and prayers will be answered.

the ladder of success

This little boy of mine is a regular sweetheart

He has had to work harder than most kids to do things that most people find and do naturally.

Like climbing a ladder for instance--

Not a big deal for most 8 year olds

but he is not like most 8 year olds--
but LIKE most 8 year olds he ignored me,
as i told him to get down.
I guess he figured if i had a camera in my hand and if i was taking pictures it was OK for him to continue UP on his ladder of success.
He got close to the top and gave me this look--

Since he cannot verbalize what he was thinking,
I am free for my own interpretation as to what he had on his mind.
I am thinking it went something like this
"What is your problem old lady?
See, I knew I could do it"

"I don't know what the big deal is.
Infact if i raise my arms I can almost touch the roof"

Or maybe that was in celebration of the fact that he has crossed another milestone off of his list of being a "normal" kid--the list of things to do to drive your momma crazy--one of those lists that usually involves blood and trips to the ER, or if it is not too serious just Urgent Care.

I guess i should be glad he is working so hard at being normal and driving me crazy and ignoring me like a normal kid would do--who knows what kind of opportunities he has now opened up with his ladder climbing? I mean the possibilities are endless--like using this new found skill to climb up on the roof and jump off onto the trampoline---YIKES--i need to remember to keep him away from his brothers and their "normal/evil" influence over this sweet boy.....

international eats week

It is not a secret that i DO enjoy food--
food is more than just a necessity of life,
it is more than something just to keep me alive.

It is a pleasure,
something to be savored,
ENJOYED!-
and i do ENJOY it.

Maybe it was the fact that i grew up with a mother who ran a cooking school and we were her test kitchen for various recipes--depending on the new lesson plan being written up determined what we would be eating. In my foggy food memory i remember tasting a variety of cold cherry soup? Dinner time was always fun with all gathered around the table and when she was testing a new recipe we were allowed to give constructive criticism--it helped us learn to distinguish the food that was placed on our palate--the varying spices and the way something was put together. I love the fact that i was exposed to so many different flavors at such an early age and that i was given the opportunity to experience different cultures through food. I think it also helped that I was raised in a home where picky eaters really were not allowed. Now that doesn't mean that we ate everything and that we liked everything. We lived by the two bite rule--you had to take two bites and then you could be finished with it. I have continued on with that rule in my life and i have found that some of my earlier dislikes are now tolerable or even likable. I have found that tastes do change as you get older....most significant example of that is my husband and his great disdain for asparagus--now he is the one picking it up and cooking it, when not to long ago he was snubbing his nose and making gagging noises when he would be confronted with it. We have tried to incorporate that same attitude toward food with our kids and for the most part they are adventurous when it comes to new flavors.


Now i will go on the record saying that while i know how to cook i am not the one that takes the role of chef--that would be my husband and my middle son is quickly following in his footsteps. Often you will find these two together in the kitchen

usually my son plays the role of sous chef--
(yes that is a micro planner he is using)

he will make some girl really happy one day.
He has been caught on occasions bragging to the "chicks" about his (to quote him) "mad cooking skills" He loves being in the kitchen--loves whipping up stuff--he is working on his knife skills--and i don't mean whittling--

even his dad wanted in on the mincing, dicing and slicing action.
They sorta had a knife off

in reviewing the pictures i couldn't help but notice my daughters face in this one

not sure if that is a look of disgust for what they were chopping up (shrimp) or maybe the way it smelled--or perhaps she was noting the competiveness of the male cooks in her household, whatever the case she didn't want a part of it until the poststickers were finished.....

to be continued......

secret ingredient

Tonight i found out i was channeling top chef
Not their cooking skills but the secret ingredient.
CAULIFLOWER--is that spelled correct?
or is it
CALIFLOUR-or perhaps
CAWLIFLEUR--well which ever way you say it,
or spell it,
it tends to be an underrated, underused vegetable.
Maybe it is because it is lacking in vibrance--
after all it is just a shade of white-
doesn't exactly scream at you--
and it tends to be one of those vegetables that sits well with others showing off their colors, like broccoli or carrots.
Usually it is cooked pretty much the same way--steamed
and i am not a lover of it in the RAW--

I found myself looking a various blogs and recipe sites in search of a recipe for a stuffed flank steak. We got a real good deal on some the other day and i figured we could do something like that. In my search i came across a recipe for a mashed cauliflower--it intrigued me and i wanted to try it out, but i assumed that we probably did not have the main ingredient--Cauliflower--It really has not been a vegetable that we have kept in our fridge on a regular basis--but low and behold there was a head of cauliflower waiting for me to mash it up.

And mash it I did.

It was down right tasty--enjoyed by the majority of my kids--although one did say it was OK and that she preferred it just steamed with the other bright vegetables.
Bottom line is--anytime you add cheese and butter and garlic to anything it has got to taste good--I am thinking this one will be a keeper--anything that can disguise a vegetable has got to be good

Brown Butter Cauliflower Mash

This recipe is a low-carb, healthy alternative to mashed potatoes. The consistency is so creamy and delicious, you won’t believe it’s cauliflower. The flavors are cheesy and delicious!

1 medium head cauliflower
4 tablespoon cream cheese, softened
1/3 cup sour cream
1/4 cup grated Parmesan
1 teaspoon minced garlic
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1/2 teaspoon chopped chives or green onion
4 tablespoons unsalted butter
1/2 cup asiago cheese (i didn't have this and it was great without it)
4 tablespoons basil pesto (optional)
Set a stockpot of water to boil over high heat.
Clean and cut the cauliflower into small pieces. Cook in boiling water for about 6 minutes, or until well done. Meanwhile, melt the butter in a small saucepan and cook the garlic until fragrant, about 1 minute.
Drain the cauliflower well; do not let cool and pat it very dry between several layers of paper towels.
In the bowl, mash the hot cauliflower with the cream cheese, sour cream, Parmesan, asiago, butter, garlic, salt, and pepper until almost smooth.
Mix in chives and pesto, if desired, and serve

another milestone

There are things that you take for granted when you have "NORMAL" kids
(actually i would like to know what "normal" is?)
All my kids are "special" but my baby has what some refer to as "special needs"
So with that being said he continues to amaze me as his does "normal" things.
Things that are just your everyday "normal" milestones--
but for a kid that has to work hard to find "normal" they are moments of celebration
TODAY was one of those days.

This kid has always enjoyed puzzles--
not actually putting the pieces in them,
more like dumping them out
and watching me put them together.
I have gotten pretty good at his puzzles--
and i have been waiting for the day when he could do them--
and
TODAY was the day!

I sat in awe as i watched my little buddy match up the colors
and not only attempt to place them but SUCCEED

now if we could only find the pieces of the puzzle that he has already lost--
that will be the next major accomplishment...
one step at a time

Minor things can become moments of great revelation
when encountered for the first time--

Margot Fonteyn

Census meltdown

I have a short fuse--
sometimes it doesn't take much for it to go off and when it does
WATCH OUT!
Stupid things really set me off
and don't even get me started on stupid people....

Tonight I have been enjoying a lovely evening at home
Kids running around, dinner in the belly
and curled up on the couch reading a book--
such peace and tranquility filled my heart....

and then the phone rang
and all calm and peace left me
and the blood pressure went up--
it is stupid that i let it bug me
that i got worked up over it
but...I did....

So what is it that set off my buttons you might ask?
A phone call that was redundant and stupid
even the person on the other line agreed that the questions were redundant
and yet she continued to ask them because she had to...
WHATEVER??!!

It was a phone call from the census
Now i want to go on the record
i think the census is important,
i was actually employed by the census 10 years ago
and that I did fill out this current census before it was due this time around
and i mailed it back in--
before it was due,
and yet i still got this phone call, questioning my answers.

I sorta tried to be patient (was not succeeding at it) as she read the long paragraph off her computer screen--OK i get it--you have to ask me some questions, get on with it. It was the repeating of what i had filled out that irked me--asking me the same question poised different ways that really set me off. LOOK LADY, I FILLED IT OUT LIKE YOU ASKED BEFORE THE DATE AND MAILED IT BACK--IT IS ACCURATE--YES ALL THE PEOPLE LIVED IN MY HOUSE BEFORE THAT DATE, ON THAT DATE, AND SINCE THAT DATE. NO ONE ELSE LIVED HERE--IF THEY HAD I WOULD HAVE PUT THEM DOWN--
UGH!!!! (just a taste of the convo that took place)

why bother to have me fill it out if you are just going to call me and go over EVERY question all over again--i am not an idiot--the census is not rocket science--but apparently they think we are not capable of doing it without their help--BARF--more government waste--all i saw as i was talking with this woman was my tax dollars going down the toilet--all on a day when we went to vote for a sales tax increase because my local and state government wants to spend more of my hard earned money--actually spend is not the right word--WASTE is more appropriate--just dang frustrated with the governments inability to stay on a budget and their solution is to take take take...more more more.

OK i am done--well sorta--i am sure i will have a melt down on some future date as i watch my hard earned money wasted on stupid things
things like phone calls that interrupt my quiet tranquil evening at home.

i am getting too old for this

It has happened.
Somewhere along the line i have gotten old--
not OLDER....just OLD.

I remember those days when the party was just starting at 9pm
and staying up after midnight was no big deal--
but those days are gone--
LONG GONE i say!
Somewhere along the way 9pm became my wind down time
(FYI i had to look up the word wind down because i thought it was spelled wrong--after all that is also wind--as in it will blow you away--but yep it is spelled right)
and midnight was something i only saw when i was forced to work late.

The kid in me who refuses to get old thought i could pull a late nighter--
it didn't matter that i was waking up at 5am--
I thought i could stay up late when i wanted to--
so with that thought i was off to the movies with my oldest daughter and son
at MIDNIGHT.
Tonight found us waiting in line for the debut of Ironman 2

On different occasions we have been those die hard people who are off to see the new release of a movie at midnight--me a person who doesn't care for crowds or waiting in line has been one of those people that can't wait 12 more hours to see the movie at a reasonable hour. One thing that seeing a movie at midnight has going for it is that it is an EXPERIENCE. If you are a people watcher (which i am) it is like winning the lottery of wierdness. Only in the dark of night do some of these people venture out--only because they are too strange fit into normal society--fantasy movies really bring them out in all costumed garb--this movie however did not have much by way of wierdo's--atleast none that i saw (what a disappointment)

Bottom line--i was awake until the movie started--once the previews were over and the lights really went down...so did my eyes. People ask me how it was--and i honestly repond.."the parts i saw were good"--the only thing that kept me awake toward the end was all the soda i had drank earlier--my poor bladder was so full--but i refused to leave the movie and go to the bathroom--I mean i didn't want to miss it??? Actually i figured if i was uncomfortable enough it would have to keep me awake--and it did.


I came home thinking i would crash until i had to get up in 3 hours--NOPE--i slept like crap. I was so worried that i was going to oversleep for work that i kept waking up--until it was finally time to really get up--dragging myself all the way. Was it worth it--Probably not--but somewher along the way i still want to hang out with my kids--and sometimes they ask you to be there friend at odd times of the night
--and i will continue to do it--
nextime,
just let me take a nap first

No Good Deed goes Unpunished...

Where has the time gone--
FLOWN BY--i say!
Was it really December when i last posted?
Some how life has gotten crazy,
crazy busy--
crazy, crazy, busy
to the point where i have been too tired to put two thoughts together
let alone an entire statement.
I would love to play catch up on what has been going on--
but....
that is not going to happen tonight.
So instead I will write about this weeks adventure/trial/blessing....
I guess i will decide which category it fits in once it is over.....

Since the hubby has been on the High Council our time together on Sundays has been reduced. Most Sundays he is in the ward he is assigned to and then once a month or so he gets the chance to speak in other various wards. On occasion i am able to go hear him speak--but more often than not I don't. When he speaks he is responsible to get another speaker to go with him chosen from a list. Once in awhile that list is short and he has to scramble for another speaker--this happened last summer and he was willing to volunteer me, and I in turn quickly volunteered my oldest daughter who was returning from Africa a few days before he needed a speaker. Missing her family, my daughter was quick to oblige her fathers request, and there for took me off the hook. I had dodged the bullet--for now....

Fast forward 8 months and once again it found my husband scrambling for a companion speaker--to which he informed me that I was his companion and I would get to speak with him--to which i promptly told him--"Yeah, I don't think so....". He then went to try and find someone else off the list--toward the end of the week he again mentioned that he needed me--much like my children I pretended like I didn't hear him--because if you don't actually hear the request it doesn't really count--Right? The poor guy resorted to sending me an e-mail to inform me that "I" was the chosen one--(i pretended that i hadn't read it) He inquired if i had checked my e-mail because now it was official--poor guy--i sorta blew his request off--chuckling under my breath the whole time. He then gave me the talk I was supposed to speak on Saturday night and told me i could have my choice of talks--some how I wasn't feeling it. I went to bed--I was tired, not knowing what i was going to speak on. My husband woke up the next morning and went to a meeting not knowing if i was really going to speak with him or not.(Poor guy--I really shouldn't have made him sweat) While he was gone i looked up some talks about some things i had been thinking about and formulated some ideas on what i would speak on. Nothing was really written down--I was not sure what direction I was really going in--I just knew I was going. My poor husband confided in me that he didn't actually know i was going to speak with him till i was walking out the door with him--I always knew i was--I guess i just like to see him sweat sometimes. So I gave my talk--I thought he had told me that i had 20 minutes--he said that he told me 12--anyway i took the 20 minutes plus 5 more i guess. I think i did OK. I had many people tell me that it was something that they needed to hear--and i thought that was it.....that it was over.
BUT.....
It wasn't.
There are times when you shouldn't do a good job speaking--like when a member of the stake presidency is sitting there and stake conference is coming up. YUP I got a call. I am one of the lucky ones that gets to speak in stake conference. I am feeling inadequate--nervous. I am wondering what i am supposed to say--what message i need to get across. All i can do is prepare and put the rest in the lords hands--that he will direct my thoughts to convey the message that needs to be given Saturday night. I will let you know if it works or not....

Easter at the Cabin

Easter came early this year. I can't remember when the last time it fell over General Conference weekend. It worked out well.Usually we get together with my husbands family for Easter so, between being off on Good Friday, and being able to watch church/conference on Saturday and Sunday--we figured we could watch conference up at the cabin just as easy as we could at home. It was a grand weekend of wonderful weather and everyone was able to play between the sessions of conference. Even my married niece and nephew and their spouses were able to hang out with us. The only one that was missing was my dear nephew who was off serving his mission in New York. Here is Grandma with all the grandkids and even the grand-dogs. Since the kids were little we have always done an Easter egg hunt with the cousins. It seems to be something that no matter their age they have yet to outgrow. Even the married kids still want to participate. They teenagers are not so much interested in the candy these days, as they are the money and gift cards that are involved. This year Grandma had this idea, that instead of a normal Easter egg hunt, that we should have the kids break into pairs and do an Easter egg scavenger hunt around the property. She went out and scouted spots and then wrote up little rhymes to put in the eggs. It was quite the ordeal. We didn't want the kids to all have the same clues at the same time so we staggered the clues--it was crazy trying to get it all figured out and we took the majority of the evening before figuring how it would work out. The next day we sent the men out to "place" the eggs. We divided up the families so everyone was paired with a cousin--we didn't want the married couples cheating. They were each given their first clue and then they were off. At this point it was a little bit difficult to take pictures--everyone was moving so fast. The deer just stood by and watched

Even the pregnant girls were running around at the speed of light. the clues were scattered all over the 5 acre property once they found the clue they had to read it and figure out where their next location was some clues were easier to find than others--

some were hidden really well and some of the hints were a bit obscure. and then there were the kids that covered the eggs up so others would not find them.

One set of kids thought that they would just watch where others got their clues from and thought that would get them the prize--it didn't work the way they wanted.

They came in last.

but they still managed to muster up a smile

and had fun in the process.

Little man was having a good time finding his own eggs-- his only had candy--no clues involved for him

he was thrilled with the contents...so was the dog.

the dog kept hoping that a treat might be shared and find its way onto the ground.

Little man was not quite that generous

the first team came in and we proceeded to check their eggs... only to find that they were missing one. Then they had to figure out what clue they had missed. It was hilarious as i watched them run off-- in different directions--and then I heard my niece yelling my sons name as she sprinted the entire way to the last clue. (she was one of the pregnant ones)

They still came in first and with first place came the largest prize. second was close--but they were also missing an egg third place came in rather tired and exhausted from the ordeal

somehow i missed the fourth place team.

All in all I think a good time was had by all involved. The "adults" that sat and watched from the porch enjoyed the spectacle and i think the other adults that were running around had a grand time as well--although there were a few of them that were a tad bit sore the next day.

Definitely will go down in the books as one of the most memorable,

along with the one that took place in the pool-- ever been in a pool in April-- just a tad bit cold hard to believe those are some of the same kids in the other pictures-- like i said earlier, it doesn't matter how old they get-- they still love the hunt