Sunday, May 10, 2009

Mothers day

Mothers day...the day for all children to be perfect and honor their perfect mothers--
and somehow the rest of us horn in on this holiday. In fact for most of us, mothers day is a day where we feel inadequate, inferior and just bad at this job of mothering. But with that being said you can't have mothers day and not write something about it.

I have been blessed with a wonderful mother--she also hated/disliked mothers day. Maybe i get some of my dislike for the day from her--maybe it is a genetic thing--I remember her crying on many a mothers day, and feeling less than "perfect"--what she didn't realize at the time--we were also less than "perfect"--but she was the PERFECT mom for us. None of us is perfect--we just do the best job we can with what we have been given. She was there after school to chat and she fed us well--and we all have a love of food, different food from different countries. She taught us to be honest and not play games--was she perfect NO--but once again neither were we. She taught many a lifes lessons to us--and while dating she was always spot on in her evaluations of the guys i brought home--plus she did help in choosing my hubby for me...

Then can i spend a moment talking about my mother in law? I realize i am in the minority here in saying that i genuinely love and adore this woman. She is amazing. I know without a doubt that the man i married is a direct reflection of the job she did--with very little help from his father. He is the man before me because of her. She is soooo supportive of her grand kids and sets such a great example for them of the importance of family...

My kids love their grandmas--these pictures are just from this week

After the orchestra concert with the middle child Seeing the oldest off to another prom--my mom was there helping stitch on the zebra trim and hubbies mom was entertaining the date while he was waiting. And how can you not love the fact that the grandma's were color coordinated

The also saw the oldest son off to prom as well--but we missed the photo op with them

This boy however loves to get his picture taken--and he loves his grandma's

we went out to dinner and he had to hold both of their hands as we were walking in--he is an equal opportunity love bug

And since i am a mother i need to mention my day--yummy breakfast before church-- and a great nap after church, only to wake up and have the wonderful smells of dinner wafting down to me. And while all of this was great--i couldn't help but look down the bench at church and reflect on how my kids are growing up--how my mothering of some of them is getting less and less. How i can no longer just hug or kiss a wound away. With the exception of my youngest the rest don't snuggle with me much anymore. They are all so independent--and that is a good thing-but it is also nice to feel needed. My middle child was off to Disneyland this weekend for school and got back at 6am this morning. She was tired and asked if she had to go to church--(that was a no brain-er answer) and normally i don't like them to sleep through services--but how could i resist when she asked if she could rest her head on my shoulder--she needed me. I sat there with my arm around her--with my daughter snuggled in the crook of shoulder. It has been years since she snuggled up with me--that my friends was the highlight of my day--i was needed--even if was only for a shoulder to lean on--AHHH what a wonderful mothers day memory....

It kills you to see them grow up.
But I guess it would kill you quicker
if they didn't.
~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams

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