Sunday, May 11, 2008

now serving HUMBLE PIE

Mothers day
is one of those days that is dreaded by many.
I don't have a real feel for it one way or another.
In general
I just hate obligatory holidays.
Why do we need Hallmark to tell us to celebrate someone special?

I know that is just me--

even my anniversary is NOT a big deal--
{but that is a subject for another day}

I always feel bad for those who have not had the opportunity to be mothers--some things in life are not fair. I know many woman who are so amazing and have not had the chance to bear their own offspring for one reason or another, and yet they impact my kids or other peoples kids lives for the good. They are the "other mothers" that help to raise our brood. I want to honor them and not leave them out.

Then i feel sad for those friends who have already lost their moms at a young age. Is there ever a time when we don't need our mom's? I can't imagine not having that support.

And of course we can't leave out the talks on someones perfect saint like mother that make the rest of us imperfect people feel rather inadequate.

Then i go back to my childhood where as children we were less than perfect and somehow made my poor mom feel bad on her "one special day". We laugh about it now---and i have some understanding of what she was feeling at times. Why do we put such pressure on our children to perform and be perfect on one particular day, when the other 364 they can't even manage it?

Here is the ultimate stab to the perfect mother persona--

{i have since given up and
what you see is what you get.}

As a young mother you tend
to make statements
that years later
you regret ever saying,
or somehow they come back to bite you in the butt.
The minute it leaves
your mouth,
you are doomed
{with almost assured certainty}
that your children will take that statement
and do everything in their power
to prove it wrong.
I was dumb and naive in thinking that my children

  • would NEVER pick their nose,

  • bite other children,

  • Pass the sacrament with their zipper down

(this one has happened on several occasions)

and any other number of statements that start out with:

My children will never
(Fill in the blank)

A few years ago [can't remember the exact year] I had this ideal of what and how my children should look like when we went to church. I did the whole matching clothes thing. My little girls wore hats and gloves. My boys would look equally as cute and i always swore that under NO CIRCUMSTANCES would any of my children ever wear tennis shoes to church (or white socks--that's another story.)I felt that it was the ultimate in tacky and i would have no part in that.

There were certain parts of being

the perfect mother

that i felt i had some control over---

only to have the bubble burst

on one fine

yes, mothers day was the day chosen to HUMBLE me

My children did not knowingly choose this day,

it just happened to be the

one special day

when I felt my children
were a direct reflection
of the job I was doing as a mother.
You want them to get up and
look perfect,
and sing perfect
(if you heard my children sing you would know that was a stretch to begin with)
as they perform those sweet mothers day songs. You hope they give you
a cute little wave
with that sweet smile,
and not hit or slug their sibling
(that was someone elses child--
{Anyway i digress}
On this given mothers day
to my ultimate horror and disgrace
church shoes came up:
not only one child,
but TWO,
in tennis shoes.
that was a proud motherhood moment for me,
{as i was choking on the
large portion
of humble pie
that my dear children
had so graciously served up for me}
I am sure no one else had a clue,
but deep down inside
at that moment I knew I had lost,




There are some things you NEVER recoup from......

1 comment:

Annette said...

I LOVE YOU AND YOUR MOTHER"S DAY TAKE! SO TRUE! No mother of the year award for me either. BUt I do, in the most part, enjoy being a mother. I just hope they look back and see the things I tried to do right and not all the things I failed at miserably. :)