Thursday, October 23, 2008

my various hair-do's

For those of you who know me
I claim to still be in my 30's
and for a brief few weeks
that is a still a true statement--
SORTA?
I NEED TO COME CLEAN--
i am really much older than that--
i know---hard to believe
but in going through pictures the other day
i found some old ones i want to share with you
DON'T JUDGE--
If you looked as good as i do at this age--
you too would say your only 40--
i don't want all those baby boomers
HATIN' Me--


This is the hairdo that my grandma Teeples taught me--we could practically be sisters

Sorry about the quality of some of these pictures--but remember they are OLD

This was the year i was placed into the witness protection program
(that's a story for another day)

they thought i could pass as a guy--
it worked for awhile---until i got too busty

And here was a day when i had the daylights scared out of me--


I thought my cover had been blown---
my hair just stood on end--
I know--CRAZY???

After that whole "hair in the air" experience
i found some really good hair paste and this was the result.
We all know that the key to a good disguise is a pair of glasses--
My name during this period was Jean Smith--
(how is that for blending in?)

Did i mention that i was a teacher?
Don't I look Teacher-ly?


Again with the glasses--I also like the terd roll for the bangs

Thank goodness someone talked me into updating my doo--
I found out that the kids were making fun of me---
oh, those irascible children.
I was also teaching at a Catholic school (hence the cross)
Those were the good old days---
when you could still wrack their knuckles with the ruler--
That's what they got for making fun of my hair!


I found i had enough of the teaching and decided to go to beauty school--

To do or not to UP doo....That is the question?
Being unable to make a decision i decided to combine several styles together
The Flip--and the Up-do
Works for me
Talk about stylish--
No beauty school drop out for me!

Once they figured out that the whole legal issue was a mistake
I was taken out of the witness protection program
and i went for a much simpler look--
(I think i also sported this look in the 90's)

On occasion I would still flip out--

just to make things interesting

and then one day i held the curling iron too tight

and found my ultra conservative republican self.
This was the ultimate look in Molly Mormon

There was just far too much forhead being shown
and i got a zit over my eyerow--

so we went back to a more casual bob

And then i decided to grow out my hair

Now days you would just get extensions
but in the old days we had to wait patiently for it to get this long
and on most days--(since we are being honest)
it was thrown up in a pony tail--
and then i got this wild hair to cut it all off
Or as they said then--
FEATHERS

What was i thinking?
Very rarely did i have a good hair day
And then someone said
AHhhF---FROH--
and i listened--

I was easily influenced during those years.
I was swayed...
everyone was doing it.
I established a rule during those dark days--
"Ones hair should not be larger than your head!"

I then brought the FRO down
and went for the doo with built in Gutters.
(they come in very handy when it is raining)
This was a time when they wanted to show how big your head truly was
hence the minute flower in my gargantuan hand

And this is what it looked like without the gutters

and then back with the feathers
(GAKKKK--what is with the Adams apple)

and then getting into my "inner soul sista'"
My friends called me SHANIQUAH
This was during the years
of being the token white girl on the basketball team.
Who says you are not influenced by your environment?
And then i experimented with the crimping iron-- Not feeling "black" enough
i went for the ultimate white girl look-
I became a material girl

with variations of big hair
big bangs and big perms
(i think i was fake baking as well in this picture)
These bangs were teased and made possible with lots and lots of hairspray.

Then i heard blonds had more fun

that and a bad perm that fried my ends caused me to shorten my hair

And then one day i had a really bad hair day
and decided to cut it all off

While easy to take care of--it made me look like a boy
and i felt fat !

And then i got fat

It was a dark time in my life--
but i feel i can come clean here--
expose myself--
(well in a manner.....)
I came out of those days
unscathed
confident in my woman hood
and being blond again helped with that


really what were we thinking with bangs?
the only purpose they serve is to hide our zits
and at this point in my life--
i should be done with that.
Thanks for taking the trip down memory lane with me.
Some of those pictures were hard to bring out--
but i know you won't judge me
and my bad choices.
RIGHT?
Even though hairstyles change--
one thing remained the same
I was always a pretty happy smiley person

I look pretty good for being almost 40 right?
(WINK--WINK)


7 comments:

Melanie said...

Umm,, someone had way tooooo much fun posting all that:) Almost 40, say it isn't so.....

Mom of fives FOB said...

Someone has way too much time on their hands.

Anonymous said...

Way fun....
and entertaining....
just like you my friend!
Miss you Mucho!!!
:)
~Lisa

Anonymous said...

think of how much laundry could have been done with all that free time.

middle age mormon mother said...

At least I spend my "free" time reading. It may be packaging on items I purchase, but hey look at what I'm learning! Really, I want to see one of your actual yearbook photos. Which one is closest to the REAL you. I bet it's the Molly Mormon.

middle age mormon mother said...

By the way, only 7 more days until your Birthday Month! Enjoy your youth while you can. Let's see how many times we can celebrate you turning the big 4-0.

Kristan Paolacci said...

Hey 40 year old friend - I have been 40 for 6 months now and I am still alive and kicking. prmoise it isn't too bad :)