Sunday, October 19, 2008

bizarro dreams

I have heard that some people don't dream--
I dream--
and sometimes i even remember what they were about.
Sometimes i wish i had someone to interpret
what i dreamt about
and why out of all the dreams
i remembered that particular one?

Last night i dreamt.
It felt so real,
and then i woke up and I remembered it.
It kinda gave me the hebbie jeebbies--

Do i have your curiosity peaked?
It really isn't "all that"
and i will say this---
for those of you into dream interpretation
"there is NO WAY it can come true--
and there is NO TRUTH to the dream"

I dreamt that i was pregnant--
this dream included
all the problems that i had endured with my pregnancies
I even dreamt of the pain i felt
being pregnant with each of them--
It felt very real...
and when i woke up
It struck me as a bit BIZARRE.

I have never been one to be baby hungry--
and I still am not--
so why am i dreaming about such things?
That is a chapter in my book
that is closed!
Beside the fact that in my mind
I have passed the age of NO return--
my parts are no longer conducive for that.
I have heard the term "Hostile Environment" used
when speaking of my parts.
So why the dream?
Why now?

Maybe, the fact that i got to meet my sweet niece for the first time this weekend--
because i got to nibble on her fat cheeks with sweet little kisses?

it was that yummy baby smell--
not the
"i just spit up"
and sour smell--
but the
"I am bathed and clean"
baby smell.

it was the sweet innocence in her eyes
that i have been missing
maybe, it was the fact that she can't talk back.

And then there are my Sunday babies--
who are growing up so quickly.
They are now standing-
drinking out of cups,
getting teeth....
It is amazing how fast they are growing up.
In standing and rocking with another baby today-
I forgot how my back hurts in doing that--
even though they don't weigh a ton-
over a period of time
that weight adds up.

When my kids were little
i thought they would be little for a long time--
but time has flown by and
my babies are no longer babies
here is my oldest baby holding the youngest baby
And then here is my baby checking out the baby--
or atleast her toys--

he looks like a monster in comparison

My babies are NOT babies
they are loud
they have opinions
they talk back
they play games with me
they can drive
and before i know it
my babies will be gone---
maybe the pain i was dreaming about
was the pain i will feel
when they really leave me.

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