I thought i had seen it all....

Normally when i take a trip out of town-
it involves many hours of uneventful driving--
lots of time to let my mind wander.
I usually come up with some amazing thoughts
and then when it comes time to put them down--
Not so amazing--
something gets lost in the translation.
All the wonderful thoughts
i had formed into beautiful sentences
GONE.

By the time i got home tonight
i was wound up--tight
my normally uneventful drive
had became quite eventful.
How quickly things can changs

It was only a trip from Tucson--
less than 2 hours
but the last half hour--
WOW WIEEEE--

Let's start with the sound coming from my bus--
sorta like an explosion--
i thought i had dropped my transmission
then i realized that i probably had blown a tire--
as i pulled off the freeway
my mind was reeling
as to how i was going to get my bus load of people home.

I thought to myself
spare tire under the bus
Full of football players
Let the games begin--
A real life exhibition of brawn--
And no one took me up on the challenge?!

Now for plan B:
There was anther football bus
and then i managed to get a hold of the cheer bus
(BIG MISTAKE)
After assessing the damage of the tire
we decided that i could still drive--
the inside duel tire had lost its tread
and as long as it wasn't rubbing
i could proceed.

We also decided to shift the kids off my bus
and load the other buses to capacity
there by lightening my load.
When all was said and done
I ended up with just a handful of coaches on my bus.

I started driving again--
with the other two buses following me
About 10 minutes into the remaining half hour trip
the cheer bus radios us
and tells us he needs to pull over
"to handle a situation"
"WHAT?"

I am thinking he is having bus problems--
but NO--
he wants to pull over to deal with "Behavior" issues
I explain to him that is what he has coaches on the bus for
he then tells me they are not doing anything
The head coach is on my bus and he wants to know what is going on.
So i ask--
The driver responds that he will take care of it
but he is going to have to pull over---

Let me just say
that in all my years of driving
I have only had to pull over with a trip
ONCE!!!!
And we are talking major problems--
(like kids hanging out the windows
up to their waist playing volleyball
between the bus and the truck next to us--
that is a problem--A BIG problem
that is worthy of pulling the bus over for)

Now we are less than 5 miles from the school
he still wants to pull over
So we all exit.
As we are stopped
My head coach gets off to deal with the problem
and this driver goes postal--
NUTS--
completely out of control.
And is YELLING

It was ugly to say the least.
I suggested that he drive my bus
which didn't have any kids on it
he didn't want to do that--
(remember i had the blown tire)

After about 20 minutes
a phone discussion with the principal
(which i got to field--since the other driver wouldn't)
reassuring her that we were working on getting the kids home safely.

We did finally manage to get everyone back on the buses
and within two minutes of leaving
I was radioed again that he was having problems.
What is going on with this dude?--
give me a break!!
I truly felt it was nothing but a control issue--
And i have come to the conclusion that there are some people
who are NOT cut out for this job.
Or maybe it is the job of working with kids--
Or maybe it is just the job of working with people--
that stresses him out--
maybe he should think of becoming a long haul trucker--
that way i would know for sure that i will never have to work with him again.
Talk about an awkward situation.

SIDENOTE:
I have been accused of being evasive--
exactly what this driver was--
not giving any additional information--
and it was not my business to question him--
Bottom line--
He felt people were standing on his bus--
it was so minor that the coaches didn't even see it,
and the kids that were accused of doing it
didn't even know they had?!
And as far as i am concerned
he should be paying MORE attention
to the road and driving
than trying to catch people
re situating themselves--

morally wrong music

I love music!
different genres--
Quite often i really don't listen to the words
it is the rhythm and the beat
that draws me in.
Sometimes I know the words and sing along
without really hearing what is being said.
then when i actually listen to the words
i am occasionally appalled.

How about the song
lips of an angel?
It has a great tune
but what he is saying....
"his girlfriend is in the next room
sometimes he wishes it was her (instead)
if she knew
she would be mad"
WELL YA--
ya big dummy!
maybe you shouldn't be cheating.
Hang up the phone--
save the heartache--

OK i know it is just a song
but is it?
Or is it a reflection on what is acceptable
in our society today?

I have a new song that i am currently feeling disturbed over
15 weeks it has been on the billboard charts
Spending 7 weeks at #1
It has a great beat
it is a fun song--
but when you really listen to the words
when you hear a young woman idly singing it--
it kinda gives me the willies.
"I kissed a girl and I liked it--
the taste of her cherry chap stick--
I kissed a girl just to try it--
it felt so wrong--it felt so right--"
EWWWEEEE
I am sorry--
they are trying to sell that lifestyle
as fun and acceptable

I do not have to accept that as OK!
I realize that i am not being politically correct--
and i am OK with that

Nothing is politically right

which is morally wrong.

---

Daniel O'Connell

Just one more way the media is chipping away
at the moral fiber of our society
at our principles---

Principle

particularly moral principle--

can never be a weather vane,

spinning around this way and that

with the shifting winds of expediency.

Moral principle is a compass

forever fixed

and

forever true.

---

Edward R. Lyman

And that is all I have to say about that--

for now.......

Necterine or Peaches

Just when you think you know someone
they throw a wrench into your assumed knowledge
and it hurts
You begin to doubt
anything you think you know about this person
wondering if you even know them at all.
You question everything--
and the DOUBT eats away at you.

About 10 years into our marriage
my husband was working out of the house.
Even though he was home most days
I rarely made him lunch.
On one rare occasion
I thought i would be nice and make lunch for my hubby.
This was not a everyday occurrence
so i thought it would make him happy

i proceeded to make him thee most spectacular sandwich
it was beautiful.
I should have taken a picture
because on the spectacular sandwich scale
it was a 10

It had toasted nine grain bread
beautifully ripe tomatoes
green leafy lettuce
rings of red onion
and thinly sliced cucumber
I believe it had roast beef
and pepper jack cheese.
(it might have been Provolone--
regardless of the particular type--it was cheese)
It was a thing of beauty!

I was proud of this sandwich
and the time i had taken to make lunch for my dear hubby
As i lovingly placed it on the plate
and carried it to my husband
in my best June Cleaver style--
i presented my work of art to him
expecting indebtedness and gratitude
or at least shock and awe.

He politely thanked me and took a bite.
I left feeling
oh so proud of myself
and my moment of pampering
of my dear husband
of 10 plus years.

I came back into his office
awhile later to find
this beautiful sandwich
barely touched.
I was dismayed--
hurt....
I inquired as to why he had not eaten it?
To which he responded
"I wasn't that hungry"
UMMMMM---OK
I guess i could live with that response
I asked him if he liked the sandwich--
it was the next statement that sent me reeling
seeded in doubt.
He proceeded to tell me
"I don't like uncooked cheese"
WHAT?????
"Yes, you do" I responded
"Have you ever known me to put cheese on my sandwich?"
I thought i had--
I guess after 10 years i didn't know him as well as i thought.
How could it be
that the man that i slept next to every night
didn't like cheese
and i didn't know it?
I vowed from that day on
I was never going to make him another sandwich--
I could not set myself up for that disappointment--
I wondered what other secrets
were lurking with in my husband
that i knew nothing about.
I guess that is why we have eternity together
to figure each other out.

So tonight i bought some nectarines.
I like peaches
but sometimes the "Fuzz"
bugs me.
I figured those in my household felt the same.
Nectarines are practically the same thing
only "fuzz free" --right?
After those in my house got over the disappointment
of Nectarines instead of Peaches
I was informed
"we like peaches better"
WHAT????
Do i not know anyone i live with?
When were they going to tell me?
What's next
Creamy over Crunchy?
Wait, I was wrong on that one also.
Next thing i will find out is
that they love skim milk?
I am not sure i could handle that one.
I am not sure i am ready for the truth.

Enduring to the end

Lately the thoughts

"Enduring to the end"

have been running through my mind.

What does that really mean?

What does that entail?

The end--meaning the end of our life?
or maybe just the end of our trial.

All of us have trials in our lives
Some are by our own making,
and then others are given to us,
to help refine us.
Those are the trials that really test our faith.
Test our endurance.
We have been told that these trials
are for our own good.
Somehow it doesn't always feel like it at the time.

As we go through different trials in our lives
Some pass quickly
While others we really have to endure.
Those are the trials
that we wish we had a time frame on
or maybe a magic eight ball
that we could shake--
and find out the exact date
or even a close approximate
of when our enduring will end.

Somehow we think we could handle them better
if we knew when it would be over
or what the outcome would be.
Would we really be enduring
if we knew the exact time and date our trial would end...
or would we just be waiting our time out
looking to the end
and not living in the moment.

I think that is where the enduring comes in.
It is in those daily trials
or the enduring
that we learn the lessons we need.

Years ago
when we were in the midst of unemployment
I remember just wanting to know
when it was going to end.
Wanting to know
what lessons i was supposed to learn
so i could get them learned and move on.
We endured a year of not knowing
and in that year
we were blessed immensely.

Blessed in many ways
that we would never would have been
if we had not been enduring our trial.
It is during those trials
when our faith is tested
that we draw closer to the lord--
we are blessed for our enduring--
even when we don't know how long it will be for.

And for those of us
who's lives are going well these days
we need to remember to include those
who are enduring in our prayers--
that they will have the strength
physical,spiritual as well as emotional
to endure their test.
Let them know that they are not enduring on their own.
We are all in this together--
it is up to us to endure each others burdens.
I know we will be blessed for our efforts....

Random acts of aggresion

I was tagged by Jen
to post six random things about me
so in sticking with the boxing theme--
I am going to come clean
with my more aggressive side.

I am going to preface this by saying
I really am a nice person--
I have a kind soul.
i love
animals,
children
and peace.
But don't cross me.....
or watch out!
I was raised with three brothers
I thought I was one of the boys.
I was taught to take care of myself
and at times i did.


1. My first visit to the principals office occurred when i was in first grade.
It was right after we came back from Thanksgiving.
My birthday had been that weekend,
so as i was walking down the hall and the principal was asking me about my weekend
i remember thinking how neat it was that he was interested in my birthday.
i realize now that he was making idle chit chat--
because the minute we got into his office
that nice, happy, interested in me persona changed.
I am not saying that i did not deserve this visit to the principals office
but did he have to disguise it initially with niceness?
Yes, I did punch Stephen in the nose
(why can i remember this kids name and i can't remember friends from High school?)
Why? Because he was bugging me.
Yes, I told him to leave me alone
and no he didn't.
That is until i hit him--then he left me alone.
(bloody noses have the tendency to do that)

2. Having two older brothers that wrestled
i was often used as a wrestling dummy
(maybe dummy is not the right word)
well actually dummy might be
because i was dumb enough to believe them
when they would say it wouldn't hurt.
I gave up my dreams of becoming a contortionist
after being tied into a pretzel multiple times.
Although it was not what i would constitute as fun
it was informative,
and did provide the training that would help me out later......

3. Junior High (circa 1982)
I was living in Virginia at the time
and the junior high I attended was called
Jefferson Davis---
we were the "Rebels"
and the confederate flag
was proudly displayed.
Mind you this was years before everything had to be P.C.

During 7th grade i had an Art class that i just loved
My teachers name was Ms.Bristo
she was cool!
It was a rather relaxed class.
Harmones being what they are in junior high
there was a young black boy
who felt the need
to go around pinching the white girls butts...
mine included
until one day i had had enough
and used my wrestling moves to take the kid down
and out.
I had him pinned face down to the floor
and sat on him
and bounced on his back--
He did tell the teacher.
She told him that he probably deserved it.
(which he did)
And that he better leave me alone.
He DID.
I told you it was a COOL class

4.Most of my close friends were guys
I dated a lot--but more as friends.
One of my guy friends
taught me to box.
Straight from the shoulder
he said
as i accidentally popped him in the nose
he declared the boxing lesson over.

5. Sophomore Year--High school drama
There was a baton twirler
girlie girl
who felt the need to spread some lies about me.
I hate few things more than gossip.
My mom came to pick me up
and was so proud of me when she observed me talking
to this young woman after school
resolving the situation.
Years later,
I explained to my mom
That i had threatened to beat the crap out of her
if i heard her saying anything else about me.
Thank goodness she didn't continue to spread those lies
cuz i woulda hurt her----
well maybe not
guess we'll never know.

6.Fast forward to my junior year
My dog of 16 years had passed away the night before
I was feeling bummed
and wanting quiet.
I was sitting in my History class
and we were supposed to be watching a movie
only the guy behind me had other ideas.
(he was on the golf team)
He could not keep his mouth shut.
I politely turned around and asked him to be quiet.
He then looked at me --
trying to be cool and impress those around him,
proceeded to tell me
F-You!
"Excuse me what did you just say?"
And he had the nerve to repeat that statement.
"I said F----YOu!"
I turned around and faced the front of the class
anger building up
seething
I don't know at what point
i lost all common sense--
but i snapped
and i turned back around
and sucker punched him in the nose.
A straight shot from the shoulder
just like i had been taught.
As i watched his head
reverberate backwards
even I was SHOCKED at what i had just done
I proceeded to tell him
to never speak to me like that again
(after all i was a lady?)
I then turned around
in complete disbelief of my behavior.
Don--
(again i remember the name of those i assault)
with his hands on his nose
said to me that if his nose was broken
he was going to sue me.
The next hour was lunch
and by the time i got to the lunch room
it had gotten around
I was the hero--
not a role i intended to play
especially not one to showcase my soft feminine side.
I don't remember many more conversations
between Don and I--
I do remember that he never spoke to me like that again.
Mission accomplished.

So there you have it
some random insight into my more
AGGRESIVE side.
I would like to say I've changed
I can't think of anyone i have punched lately?
but i still don't put up with anyones nonsense--
it has come in pretty handy with my job.
I do try the nice side first--
and most times that does work.
Kindness and consideration goes a long way
I guess i have grown up a little....
But there are still those occasions where i end up
wrestling.....


I want to know some bits of randomness from....
in no particular order......
Mindy...
Dianne....
Annette....
Connie......
Alli ....
and Lynn
like none of you have anything else to do
and anyone else who wants to play along--no pressure






Here are the rules:
1.Link the person who tagged you.
2.Post the rules on your blog.
3.Write 6 random things about yourself.
4.Tag 6 people at the end of your post and link to them.
5.Let the person know you tagged them on their blog.
6.Let the tagger know when you've posted.

political Olympics

I am going through
an Olympic withdrawal.
For two weeks
there was no question as to what we would watch.
It was as if there was only one station on the TV.
(which when i lived in Germany really was the case)
Not having to change the channel is a good thing
especially when you can't find the remote.

I watched the closing ceremonies
and i felt like it was a let down.
How do you culminate
two weeks
of amazing athletic feats?
And what about those athletes
that for years have trained for these two weeks
Call it postpartum olympic blues.
i am sure that many felt let down with it ending--
for many this was their one shot at perfection
never to happen again.
For others they will go home and start training
for four more years.....

More than missing the athletic prowess
and the not having to change the channel
I miss the way the country was brought together.
The pride we all felt each time
one of our countrymen (or women)
were at their best
Watching them receive their medal
especially the gold
and seeing the flag
our countries flag
raised in their honor.
Our country was brought together
we were unified
we felt pride for the
"land that we love"
and it has all ended.

No sooner had the flame
of camaraderie and sportsmanship
been extinguished
but the political nonsense started.

All those wonderful feelings
of being unified and brought together
ended in one fell swoop
with the start of the political conventions.
It is sorta like the Olympics...
well boxing anyway....
the political convention is like watching a bout
with white collar boxers

the jabs
the dirty fighting
the hitting below the belt
the intentional fouls

and each time a blow is thrown
the next day a counter punch is delivered
and sometimes they bring in an outside fighter
who will deliver an upper cut of their own.

No one is willing to throw in the towel
they all want to go the distance--
Come November 4th
i am hoping that this country
will be saved by the bell.
And that all this divisive behavior
can be put aside.
I just hope we won't have to have the Olympics
to bring our country back together
it might be a long wait......

missionary meals

I love the rain.
The last time we had the missionaries it rained
we had them again tonight
and it rained....

I am beginning to see a pattern.

I love having these young men for dinner.
They are an great example for my children.
They are a great example of service
and the love of God.

I love having them
because i think of their parents
Wondering if they are being fed
Wondering if they are being taken care of...

I have had friends who have sent out their boys
and hopefully one day i will be doing the same.
I hope that when that day comes
there will be families
willing to open their doors
and invite my child in
to share a meal and a thought.

And just so you know
they really liked
breakfast for dinner--
i found out
(not that i had any doubts)
that young men will eat about anything.
In fact in was dessert and breakfast--
waffles with ice cream,strawberries and chocolate syrup.
Not to worry--
We did throw in some healthy food
after all they are growing boys.....

R-rated movies and porn

As you can tell by the title
this should be a rather interesting topic.
It has been at our house today.
Nothing like Sunday dinner--
watching your children squirm in their seats,
wanting to be anywhere but where they are.
Wishing that the conversation would change
and knowing that they are captive.
Generally food eases the pain
of an awkward discussion.
Generally we don't have these discussions
for Sunday dinner--
but today was the exception to both rules.

When our oldest was 4 days old
(and we were naive parents--
not knowing how to raise this youngin')
we took her to an R-rated movie.
As i recall she slept through it--
hopefully she is not too scarred from our choice.
The funny thing is that i can even remember
this dumb movie.
It was a movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger
called Total Recall.
I can't totally recall why it was rated R
but i remember thinking
"why are we taking the little one to it?"

Some where along the line
we grew up and decided
that we would no longer view R-rated movies.
Our prophet had asked us not to--
and every time I did
I questioned why i thought my judgement was better
than a prophets.
Aren't we given guidance to help us in this journey of life-
then why do we blatantly ignore it?
For the most part
I have not missed these movies.
On occasion i miss the historical based movies
that are rated R, due to the nature of what took place.
But i figure do i really need the visual to understand
the atrocity of what man can do to each other?

I have had others recommend R movies to me
and when i explain that i don't watch R movies
I get the "your weird" look
I then explain that i don't need to fill my brain
with additional garbage--
and they proceeded to tell me
"Well the movie wasn't that bad....
except for this one part and then i guess this other part..."
So i guess i just don't want those "parts" in my brain.
It has been easier to encourage our children
not to see these movies
when we don't.
I don't like to play the role of a
Hypocrite.
Being a parent is hard enough
without your children pointing out your faults.
Our children seeing R-rated movies
hasn't really been much of an issue--
or so i thought.

So why am I spilling my past
well I will let you into a glimpse of my life
and where i am going with this train of thought

I love teaching Sunday school
and talking with the kids
and seeing what is going on in their lives.
And sometimes you stumble upon information
quite by accident.
Sometimes they don't say anything-
maybe it is just a look
that has you inquiring for more information.
That was the case today.
I found out that a group of kids
(including mine)
went to the movies last night
and all but three went to an R-rated movie
I am happy to report
that thanks to my fine example
(well not really)
but thanks to smart children
who are trying to do what is right
two of those three were mine.
I am very proud of the them and the fact
that they stood up for their beliefs.
That they chose to be the ones that made a wise choice
without us being there to help them, to guide them.
That they have heard the things being taught to them
and have listened and obeyed.
That they chose to be different,
even among kids who have been taught similar lessons.
Now if you ask my son about the movie he did see
his response was something like this
"I don't really know what it was about
It was some dumb chick flick."

Now onto the "Porn" portion of this entry
My husband had porn on the brain--
not the actually visual
but wanting to discuss it with our children
and the insidious problem it is becoming in our society.
How it is so addictive
and destroys lives and marriages.
What constitutes porn
and what they should do if they stumble upon it.
It is so much easier to view these images these days
and if you can do everything to avoid it
how much better off you will be.
It is much easier to never have the problem
than to try to get rid of it
once it is a problem.
Life is hard enough without addictions.

By the time we finished talking
my children were ready to be done with dinner
willing to clean the kitchen
and put away the food.
Anything to get away from the table.
So for now
the porn discussion
has been tabled
i am sure it will be talked about another day
not the most fun discussion
but one that needed to take place non the less.
You have to warn your children of all the evils of the world.
Things that were never really an issue for us growing up.
It is sad that the list of evils
continues to grow....
and as new things are added
we will continue to discuss them
even if it does make us
or our kids uncomfortable......

Avoidance, lunch and power shopping

So many things to do
so little time
so i avoid them.

I have been avoiding my house
It needs a deep cleaning
I need to do laundry
I am lacking in desire and motivation
(are desire and motivation similar items?)
So instead of working on this monstrosity of a mess
i avoided it
and gave service instead
by helping clean someone elses mess.

Why is it sooo much easier
to deal with other peoples messes
than your own?
It was also much more fun
working with someone
talking and enjoying the day.

Then i got to enjoy a late lunch
with some girlfriends.
{again avoiding the house}
Thank goodness for birthdays--
it seems we need an excuse to get together
and that is it.

After lunch
i did some casual shopping
{how long can i stay away?}
then drove to the house
grabbed the girls
headed to the mall
with some specific shopping in mind
and we were in and out with packages in hand
in less than an hour
and that included trying on clothes.

I had now run out of excuses
I was going to have to face the mess.
Face what i had been avoiding.

Often i wish for the cleaning fairies to come
while i am away.....
and today they did.
After avoiding the house all day
I walked into a much improved house.
Not perfect by any means
but definitely improved!
What awesome cleaning fairies i have--
disguised as my children?!
Can i say
What a pleasant surprise!!!
I guess sometimes if you avoid something long enough
the problem really does remedy itself.....

Trying to raise an adult

There are days

when raising your children

makes you incredible frustrated.

In spite of all your best efforts

you wonder if they will be

polite,

considerate,

hard working,

thoughtful,

caring,

clean

adults.

{among many other useful traits}

Now most of these traits

do not come naturally.

These are things that we continually work on,

and almost all of them are contrary to being a

Teenager.

The motto of a teenager

is similar to that of a two year old--

it is something like

"It's all about ME"

ME,ME,ME,ME,ME

I have known some adults that continue to live by this motto.

They are not people that i generally want to be around

or hang out with for any length of time.

So with that in mind

when i find my children

acting in that manor

it makes me ever so crazy

and scares me to death.

I do not like that attribute

one little bit.

I wonder if i have failed--

will they be "THOSE" adults?

Those people who i don't want to be around

since they think the world revolves around them?!

I want to want to be around my children--

especially as adults.

This behavior makes me crazy mad

as few things make me madder

than continued self centered behavior

and i kinda loose it--

and then we have a meeting of the minds

{mostly mine}

Today I had one of those meetings

and i am happy to say

that there were

immediate changes.

What a pleasant surprise to see that

what i said

was heard

and actually listened to!

It gives me hope

that they will turn out OK.

That they will be the kind of adult

I want them to be.

Changes so drastic

that this child

payed for dear hubby and i

to go out to dinner

and even made the reservations!

I'm not sure--

do you think they were buying us off?

Whatever it was

it sure was

YUMMY!

Exercise--what exercise?

Tonight was volleyball
you know
bump
set
spike

serve
fall-
roll around
pain
agony
frustration

game point

And no i am not talking about the Olympics.
(although the game was on when i got home
and it was quite exciting--with the U.S. winning gold)

For the first time in about 10 years
i went and played volleyball at church.
It was some of the most fun i have had in a long time.

After running around
and getting all the kids where they needed to be
I figured i would just go down
and see what was going on.
I didn't really think i would be playing
so i hadn't changed my shoes
was still in jeans and a light sweater.
Needless to say i was a bit overdressed
for this event.

Earlier in the day I was with a bunch of ladies
and they were talking about running,biking and general exercise.
All of which does not thrill me.
My idea of running
involves someone chasing me and mortal danger,
and exercise for the sake of exercise
(while i know it is good for me)
involves precious time
and often i can think of something else I need to do.
But i have decided
that i am willing to get sweaty
(i mean perspire)
for the sake of fun.

Like, i enjoyed the mountain bike riding this summer
even though it was sleeting on us as we rode

I had forgotten how much i enjoy team sports
I had forgotten how much I like being the player
vs. my normal role of spectator
I had forgotten how much i enjoy playing volleyball
I had forgotten how competitive i am
I had forgotten how much i enjoyed getting sweaty
(actually i was glistening)
and for a moment i had forgotten that this

constituted exercise.
I also forgot that i am almost 40
I felt like i was in my 20's again,
until i tried to jump

and that extra 50 lbs held me to the ground
or when i landed on the ground
and felt like i needed one of those
"I've fallen and i can't get up" pagers.
Despite the years and the weight
I still managed to play well.
I think i surprised many around me.
I was sad to see the evening come to an end.
When i got home
I went preemptive

and dosed myself
with drugs---
because i was sure

i would feel the effects of my night...
in the morning.
I slept like a rock
or like i had exercised
and in the morning
I felt great with a few minor aches and pains.

Next week i might actually
don shorts
and sneakers
and wear a t-shirt.

{and buy stock in a pain relief company}
I mean if i am going to play
i might as well look the part.....

Bewitching thoughts

I should be sleeping--
but I'm not.
There is something about a long drive
that keeps me awake
for hours after the fact--
maybe it is all the thoughts
i have been mulling through my brain.
I have gone so many different directions.
thunk so many thoughts.
Interested in some in site into this trap of mine?

Let's start with Bewitched.
The TV show
not the remade movie
(which even with Nicole Kidmans cute nose
was not good)
That was a show that i LOVED growing up
I was so intrigued every time they would say
"Now in Technicolor"
I had NO idea what technicolor was
but i figured it must be a pretty cool thing
if they were announcing it.
Yes, i lived in the stone age with a black and white TV.
We would even have to get up to actually change the channel.
I would try wiggling my nose
Samantha style
in hopes of it working
but alas.....

We still have to get up to change the channel most days
but it is not from lack of technology.
It is from lack of remotes.
Isn't it ironic that they are called "remotes"
since most of the time they are ......
remote--
During remote development
i bet they sat around thinking
"what should we call this thing?"
"Well since most of the time it will probably be lost
let's call it remote."
Yep, I'm pretty sure that's how it all went down.

So anyway
back to Bewitched....
The reason i started thinking about this show
was her ease in accomplishing things
when she became overwhelmed
or behind...
and as long as Darin didn't find out
everything would be OK---
but he usually found out and then would be upset.
Did he not fully appreciate the many things she had to do?

My mind was a flutter as i was driving
projects that i could envision
re-organizing
cleaning
upholstery
wood working.
So many things i want to do!

Here is wishing i could wiggle my nose
to make it happen.........

Blessed is being a friend

I am thankful

for so many things!
i am blessed
even in my trials and frustrations
I know i have people
around to support me.

I hope i see their needs....
I hope i am supporting them......

A wise man once said this
and i thought I would share it

"If you sometimes get discouraged,
consider this fellow.

He dropped out of grade school.
Ran a country store.
Went broke.
Took 15 years to pay off his bills.
Took a wife.
Unhappy marriage.
Ran for House.
Lost twice.
Ran for Senate.
Lost twice.
Delivered speech that became a classic.
Audience indifferent.
Attacked daily by the press
and despised by half the country.
Despite all this,
imagine how many people all over the world
have been inspired by this awkward,
rumpled,
brooding man
who signed his name simply,
A. Lincoln."
(Wall Street Journal.)

'It is important to know,
when you feel down,
that many others do also
and that their circumstances
are generally much worse than yours.
And it's important to know
that when one of us is down,
it becomes the obligation of his friends
to give him a lift.

I hope that each of us
will cultivate a sensitivity
toward the feelings of others,
and when encouragement is needed,
make an effort to extend it.
Be a friend,
and you will have a friend.
God be thanked
for wonderful friends.'
--Gordon B. Hinckley,
"Strengthening Each Other,"
Ensign, Feb. 1985, 3

monday frustration

This morning came early.
Actually it came at the same time it does everyday,
but my body and mind
were rejecting the fact that it was morning.
I felt like i was in a fog.
Walking, driving--functioning?
Awake,
but still mentally asleep.
I could have closed my eyes
and been back to sleep in less than a minute--
but i didn't,
and i stumbled through till noon
and then the fog cleared
and i was awake--
TAH DAH.
Such a weird morning.

To add to the fog of the morning
was a lost cell phone.
I feel like this modern technology
is like a thorn in my side.
I am sooo in favor
of a phone implant.
That way, the only way it could be lost
would be if i misplaced my head.
And all i have to say is that on mornings like this,
it could be a possibility.

I ran around the house
calling myself
NOTHING--
I called my husband
and had him call me at my moms.
NOTHING--
Nothing but....
frustration.
All the while i am looking--
I am telling myself
that i love my little one
(cursing him under my breath)
because i am sure that he has gotten it
and lost it somewhere in the house.
I checked all the bathrooms,
the sinks,
tubs and toilets.
NOTHING!

There is nothing like the handicapped feeling
of being without your phone.
My lifeline,
and all my numbers
(which i have slowly been recovering from the Chicago loss--
call me so i can replace yours--if i haven't talked to you in a while)
I had given up
and sent my daughter home to look for it.
I was at my mom's
and imagine my surprise
when i heard a ringing
from under the love sacs.
What do you know--
there was my phone....
Probably where I left it on Saturday--
my little one had nothing to do with this disappearance.
I owe him an apology--well sorta.

So i finally had my phone back.
Important phone calls were being made--
and dropped.
{AHHH, i love modern technology.}
I was talking with the doctors office
and not once but twice
my call dropped.
Finally we got it worked out--
Only then my phone went dead
when i was talking with a friend
catching up--
(sorry D.L.)
So now i have a dead phone at my moms
and no way to charge it--
because my charger was in the Van
which the older daughter had taken to swim practice
(because i thought i wouldn't need the van)
Then the doctors office called the house
(remember the cell phone is dead)
and the younger daughter rode over to my mom's
to tell me that they wanted me to come in
NOW.
And guess what
I couldn't find the keys to the other car
My poor daughter
had to ride back and forth
making calls for me
to her dad
the doctors office
and such.

After today
i am going to invest in
a telegraph machine--
or maybe work on my
smoke signals--
And then i am buying a horse--

I realize that technology
is supposed to make our lives easier
but today...
it just seemed to complicate my life
and fill it with frustration.

my olympic dream--dashed

I went on the website for the Olympics last night.

There are many sports that fail to get any exposure on TV.

I didn't even know about some of these events.

Like.....

Trampoline?!.

Yes, jumping on a trampoline is an Olympic sport.

I started thinking...

i could do that-----

then i saw how

HIGH

they jumped

and the crazy flips they did

and then i remembered

the one thing that would hold me back

more than anything else.

Can you say

FIVE KIDS

and

BLADDER CONTROL.?

There goes my Olympic dream....

Maybe there is an opening on the table tennis team?....

olympic awe

I feel that i have been remiss in my writing.
Lately by the time the evening rolls around,
i am sooo tired and bleary eyed
that i can barely put two thoughts together
let alone a whole sentence.

I have been burning the candle at both ends--
but those days are soon over.

Along with the rest of the world
I have been staying up late to watch the
OLYMPICS--

Every four years
I find myself in this sleep deprivation.
I really remember it starting with the 84 Olympics.
We were living on the east coast at the time
and we had to deal with the 3 hour time difference.
I remember staying up many late nights
to watch men's volleyball
and Mary Lou get her gold in gymnastics.

There are certain things in life that are monumental.
Events that change the world,
and you remember where you were
when it took place.
I was too young to remember Mark Spitz

and his 7 gold medals
(although years later we went to the pool in Germany

where it took place)
I have heard a first hand account about this event

from someone who was also there swimming,
and it was interesting to hear their perspective.
It is amazing that the gold medal record stood for as long as it has
And if you watched any of the events
you know it was not a easy feat.
Shall we talk about his 100 butterfly?
One one hundredth of a second--
it was Michael's to lose--
and yet he won.

Is Michael Phelps the greatest swimmer/Olympian ever?

That will be debated--

but on this particular week

against those particular athletes

he managed to put together perfect swims.
All those medals are not his alone.
He needed his teammates to be at their best
for a few of them.
These medals are his moms, his families, his coaches and teammates.
All these people helped to make him better.
They have been there supporting him
pushing him--perfecting his talent.
And for this week
he was perfect!
Maybe this will never happen again.
Maybe it will be another 36 years before it will happen.
But until that day
I will remember sitting at my moms
watching it take place on the big screen
cheering for Michael
cheering for our country
and all those representing it.
Filled with amazement and awe.

Age on Dreams

As much as i love the Olympics

i find it to be a real time sucker.

Usually when i have the TV on

i am doing something else as well.

Keeping busy

Accomplishing things.

But that is not the case with the Olympics.

You actually have to stop

and watch

and wait

to get the full effect.

And as much as i am enjoying the sports

I do find it frustrating.

It is a good thing that it only happens every 4 years

otherwise i would have to banish myself from the TV.

I have enjoyed watching a 41 year old woman

Dara Torres--

have the ability to swim and compete at this level.

Age wise--she could be some of her competitors mother.

At the prelim for her event

one of the other swimmers suit ripped.

In a motherly like fashion

she calmed the other swimmers down

and took care of the situation with the officials.

Such a mature display of sportsmanship.

Would she have done that 20 years ago?

I don't know.

I felt such pride for her and her medal accomplishment.

She missed the gold by one one hundreth of a second

to a much younger swimmer.

When asked what she would tell her own daughter

about this olympic experience she said

"you don't have to put
an age limit

on your dreams"

I love that!!!

And the there was Lezak

the anchor swimmer in the men's relay

He is in his 30's

He is the swimmer that was key in winning the 4X100

Not that the 30's are old

but in a sport dominated by young punks.....

And then how about the 33 year old

gymnast from Germany?

She has a son that had leukemia.

It is amazing that she was still out there competing

against the 10 year olds from China

(oh wait--they were actually 16--wink wink

they only looked like 1o years old)

I know there were many other stories of

"grown ups"

with families

and lives

but sometimes i forget

in this world

obsessed with body image

and youth--

that being in your prime

is not just about being in your 20's.

We all have dreams

sometimes it just takes some of us

longer to realize them than others.

I guess the morale of the story is

"don't give up"

or

"if you dream it--

you can achieve it"

SiNG--SiNG a Song

UPDATE:

I had no clue that there is like

50 million versus to

"this little light of mine"

and i will probably not remember

any of them.

That's just the way my mind works

or maybe it doesn't work.?

WHATEVER.

thanks for your help

and now i know,

this little box that i randomly type into

well guess what----

it is the holder of any and all

useless and trivial information

(OK i already knew that but it slipped my mind)

Now i am trying to figure out a song that was in a movie.

don't actually have the words

but the tune is like this

HMMM---HMMM--Hm--Hmm

so any thoughts?

anything?

OK fine--

sleep on it

and let me know in the morning.

Those that know me well

know that i am not known for my voice

at least not the one for singing.

I am not a HorRible, Horrible singer

just not a very good one.

I'm OK with the fact that i don't have that talent.

I have other talents,

and i am perfectly content to listen to others sing.

I enjoy sitting back and taking it in

without the pressure to perform.

But....

I do like to sing and rock out on occasion.

Years ago when i was on a special ED route

we had to sing to keep one of our kids happy.

She liked to sing "Jesus" songs

we didn't know the songs she did,

so the other driver and i would sing primary songs.

It kept her happy

and she didn't care that I didn't sing so well.

I often find myself

wanting to sing while i am driving the bus.

(and when i sing i like to belt it out)

I have to continually remind myself

that there are people on the bus and

to refrain from singing

while i drive.

Some how i don't think they would appreciate

my primary songs or my other randon songs.

You never know the songs that pop into my head

Often the songs are soooo

RANDOM.

I have no idea where they come from.

The problem with these random tunes

1. you can't get them out of your head

2. I often don't know all the words

So i am left making up lines to sing

or i keep singing the same line over and over again.

That is the case these past few days.

Will someone please tell me the rest of the words to

"This little light of mine"?

I know the next line is

"I'm gonna let it shine"

And yes i have been singing those two lines

over and over again

Isn't that a sign of being crazy--

doing the same thing over again

but expecting a different result?

Help me!

my sanity is depending on you

otherwise the next time you see me

I might be in a lovely white jacket

with really long sleeves that wrap around--

huddled in the corner

singing or humming to myself

"this little light of mine--

I'm gonna let it shine--

this little light of mine--

I'm gonna let it shine--

this little light of mine

I'm gonna let it shine

let it shine

let it shine

let it shine."

Wait I think that is the whole song

it's kinda like

"the song that Never ends--

it goes on and on my friends--

AHHH the insanity!

OK--i will stop right there

now that will be stuck in my head the rest of the day

will some one please find something else to fill that void

between my ears......

My Mantra

In working with my friend Liz last year at her house,
there was something that i would say again and again.
It became my mantra.
I believe it with all my heart--
I live it--
because when i don't it makes me crazy!

It is simple,
but OH SO PROFOUND--
the right tool makes the difference!
From the right hammer to the right screwdriver,

and in hanging crown I love my saw

(although i have been salivating over another--

but can't justify another when the one i have works well)

I live and die by a book that gives me the correct cutting angels.

It makes a difficult task just that much easier

glow of happiness

Sometimes.....

it is the small things that leave me feeling a

warm and fuzzy

Satisfied.

Glad i am a mom--Today.

Hugs from teenagers--

Little boys snuggling up to go to sleep.

Sweet kisses from the little one.

And a dog that loves and adores me.

When we recall the past,

we usually find that it is the simplest things -

not the great occasions -

that in retrospect

give off the greatest glow of happiness.
Bob Hope

movie review

I am going to start this entry

by saying:

I realize i am in the minority in what I am about to say.

I know you will think i am WRONG

maybe even FrEaKish.

but i must go on the record as saying

{and again i will state i know i am one of the few}

I HATED

(yes, that is with a capitol H)

I mean really HATED

Batman.

Oh, the relief i feel

finally getting that off my chest.

The majority of the time that i was watching the movie

my conscious kept telling me to leave

and did i listen--NO.

Do i wish i had--YES.

I just felt like it sucked the light out of me.

It left me feeling depressed

about the real evil that is present in the world.

It was NOT cartoon-ish to me

and i felt such sorrow for Heath Ledger

and the role he played

and how he died.

While a few of my children have seen it

the remainder will not.

Call me a mean mom

but i am going with my conscious on this one.

Birthday mishaps

Today is my first born sons birthday.
Quite a momentous day
since he
turned 16.
SIXTEEN??!!!

I am having a hard time
coming to terms with that.


When did this little punk grow up?

He is now legal to date?!!

GIRLS will officially be in the picture--

I use the plural since i don't want any ONE--

I would much rather have him date many
and have a good time doing it.





His father had told him that if he took out a different girl
each month he would pay for the date--
What was he thinking???
I guess time will tell if he takes his dad up on that deal.

Sixteen years old.
For the past sixteen years
I have been there for the monumentous occasions.
{as well as the not so momentous)
Like his birth.
{I was intricately involved in that one}
When he went to school.
When he was baptized.
When he had eye surgery.
When he turned 12 and was ordained a deacon
And then 14 when he was ordained a teacher
and i had planned on being there
when he was ordained a priest.
I think it is a pretty big deal--
seeing your son accept the responsibilities
of becoming a Priest,
and blessing the sacrament.
It makes me proud to see him advance in the priesthood.
To know that how he is living his life so that he is worthy to hold that honor.
And i would have loved to have seen him ordained--
YES i said "WOULD HAVE"
see my husband in his rush after church
failed to notice that HALF of the immediate family was missing.
He went ahead and proceeded without me!
His WIFE
the woman who spawned this child,
who had horrible back labor with this child.
I was missing and yet unnoticed
until it was over
and all was said and done.
I am the same mom who days ago
wouldn't even think of missing the first day of school
with this kid.
And I know that there will be more first days of school,
but he will never be ordained a priest again.
That was a once in a lifetime
and i was missing---
and my husband wondered why i was upset.......

Olympic party

Tonight was the first night of the Olympics
only we were watching what was happening tomorrow
or today in China.
It is so confusing!
is it today or tomorrow?
morning or night?
UP-DOWN
north, south--
I just don't know anymore.
Regardless of my state of confusion
we had Chinese take out
in celebration of the fact that the
Olympics were on.
Well not really
but it did seem rather festive
party like
when you say that.

We were watching it on my moms bigscreen

(thanks for the use of the cottage this summer)

and i will go on record as saying

i think the gymnists were life size.

as we watched gymnastics
We OOOOHHHED
and AWWWWWED
and GASPED
at the incredible things
that they can do with their bodies.
We enjoyed the swimming
(it's our thing--what can i say?)
I wish/hope
Michael Phelps
will get his teeth fixed when all is said and done.
And can we hear it for

41 year old mom's
who are ripped
and kick some kid butt
in the pool!!!
WHOOOOHOOOO
I know she can't hear me
or any of the athletes for that fact
but.....
GO USA!!!!

can i just say
I just love the Olympics!

Still Vanilla

I have taken that
dumb-stupid waste of time quiz again.
And i am still Vanilla.
32% of people are Vanilla.
I have had a few people take the quiz that i know
and i have a Strawberry,Rocky Road and Chocolate friend.
And just for the record
after reading what chocolate is
I am NOT chocolate
but i thought i could maybe be
Rocky Road.
Dear Hubby took it three times
and three times he was different
(I think he was fudging his answers)
First he was Mint Chocolate Chip
then Coffee
and followed up with Rocky Road.
I am beginning to lose my faith
in the highly scientific interpretation
of this test
I mean VANILLA
three times.
I guess i am going to have to rethink
my ice cream selection.

What's your flavor?

Tonight i took a personality quiz based on what flavor ice cream you are,
and this is what it came up with


You're Vanilla.

I even did it twice and changed up my answers and both times i was

VANILLA???

VANILLA???

Isn't vanilla bland,boring and predictable?

Vanilla is the ice cream that needs to be accompanied with something else

in order for me to eat it.

I never eat Vanilla unless it is blended in a shake

or accompanied with an apple dumpling or something equally as yummy.

I almost feel insulted at the thought of being called

Vanilla

Until i read this

And then i realized that if this is what Vanilla is.....

I don't want to be Chocolate

(I have no idea the personality of chocolate)

But Vanilla just seems to fit me.

You're as popular and relaxing as vanilla ice cream. You go with the flow, and get along with all sorts of people. You appreciate peace and simplicity, so you sometimes find crowds and loud noises overwhelming. You are a chilled-out, calming influence on the people in your life, and your friends appreciate how supportive and flexible you are.

Simple blessings to be thankful for

I haven't had very many DEEP thoughts today
or maybe I have had deep thoughts
but they were just short in length
vs. depth.
The thought that ran through my brain today
was the simple things I am thankful for.

Friends--
(not that they are simple)
and i am so grateful for the fact
that i have been able to stay friends
with those that are living far away!

A bus with air-conditioning
(do i really need to expound on that one)
I will just say that i was the envy of work
with my sweet air-conditioned ride that i was driving

A sewing machine that works
especially when i am in
"crunch time"

RAIN--
love that wet stuff
especially this time of year
when it brings down the heat!

Some BeAuTifUl Sunsets
mostly because of the storms coming in

My Kids
and the love they show for their
little brother

When you think of life,

think first about the blessings you have.

Don't focus on misfortunes,

for they are but a faint shadow

Calculators and Cars

Remember years ago when calculators were used
to add and subtract numbers.
Simple things.
Not anymore--
I think you can now figure out quantum physics
or something equally as complicated,
right in the palm of your hand.
Not that i have ever done quantum physics,
or even have a clue as to what it is.
But i bet if i had a new calculator i could figure it out.
Now days these calculators
do more than our first computer could,
and much faster as well.

My husband just informed me
that the #1 punks new calculator
cost $80.00
WHAT????
For that price this calculator should do magic tricks.
Oh wait, it did.
We started out with $80.00 in our wallet
and it disappeared.
TA-DAH.
He told me it was a graphing calculator.
Does that make it like an etch a sketch or something?
I just want to know if it will guarantee her an "A"?
I would pay at least $80 for that.

NOW onto the CAR portion of this entry
otherwise known as

"One of these things doesn't look like the other"

sometimes i feel like i am the square peg
trying to fit in the proverbial round hole.
Today as i pulled up to my sister-in-laws house
I felt like the redneck cousin.
or maybe the redheaded step child
(but since i have a redheaded friend i won't say that)
As i was looking at the line of the other in-laws cars
(we were all there for a lunch to welcome the nephews fiance' into the family)
I was too intimidated to park my car in the same row as everyone else's.
I am not much on name brands
and when it comes to cars
i could care less about prestige
i figure as long as it gets you from
point A to point B
it really doesn't matter
the name brand on it.
That is,
unless you are trying to Valet park.
And then it is a tad embarrassing when you "have" too
and the door handles are broken on the doors
(i figure it keeps the car jackers out)
That was not the car i was driving today.
Oh how i digress.
I was driving my Chevy Astro van.
The rest of the cars were also Chevy's,
but that was where the similiarities ended.
All the rest were either
Tahoes, Yukons or Suburbans
(yes, that is plural because it was a long line of cars and more than one of each)
and then throw in the occasional Escalade.
(I kid you not--I only wish i had a camera)
So i parked my
HUMBLE,
uncool
mom-mobile
in the drive-way.
Away from the shiny
cool rimmed
gas guzzlers.
(i call them all those names but if you gave me one i would take it!)
It really doesn't matter what I drive
(right?)
cuz after all
I am the
COOL,
FUN
aunt.
And in my own words.
I am their favorite.
Even if it is not true.
I believe it!
Even if my cars NOT.

passing thoughts

I try to be positive
and not let too many things bug me--too much.

But there are a few things
that just yank my craw
(exactly where is the craw?
--never mind--
that will be a subject for another day)

Let's just say this just bugs me.....
ALOT

Now if you are one of these people that do this atrocity
I beg you
repent
change your evil ways---
and most important of all
GET OUT OF THE FAST LANE!!!

Perhaps this has been bothering my more
because of my recent road trip.

Those of you who choose to travel in the passing/fast lane
without any acknowledgement of those around them--
you know those people
who are going faster than you are
those people
who want to pass you on the LEFT
which really is the proper lane to pass in--
but you are so oblivious to the fact
that there are actually other people on the road with you--
that you continue on your Sunday drive pace
in the fast lane.
If you are not going to move over--
please I beg of you--
keep your car in the right hand lane--
so those of us
who want to get somewhere--quicker
can pass you safely!

I am now finished with my tirade--
until the next time i find myself on the road with those who refuse to move over.

simply blessed

We had scriptures,
prayers,
and the house was settling down for the night
and then someone opened the door
and the rain came in.
You would think we had opened the door
to the sweepstakes awards
as excited as everyone was.
It's RAIN.
But even i came up stairs,
and watched it pouring down.
Such a simple joy
that took me many years to appreciate.
Often it is going without something
that makes it that much more precious.
I wonder how many things that i have in my life
that i just take for granted
because it has always been there
or because i have been blessed with an abundance.
I have never wanted for a roof over my head
(well except when i was in Chicago)
I have always had food on my table
I have never known hunger.
And my family has been blessed with good health.
We have our moments,
but nothing like some struggles
that i have watched others go through.
I love those times of reflection
so i can stand back
and see how truly blessed i am.
For even the most simple of pleasures
for even
the RAIN!

Let us rise up and be thankful,

for if we didn't learn a lot today,

at least we learned a little,

and if we didn't learn a little,

at least we didn't get sick,

and if we got sick,

at least we didn't die;

so, let us all be thankful.

~Buddha

first day a success

This time last year
i was miserable.
I had several children
who on the first day of school
had meltdowns.
I remember after i had dealt with one
another one started in--
and i looked at them and asked
"if they really wanted to go there?"
To which that child stopped
and waited till the next day
to schedule their melt down.
It was a horrible first few days of school
and all i can say
What a difference a year makes.
All came home happy today.
Pleased with their teachers and classes.
I realize it is a tad early
to declare the year a success--
but I feel we are on the right track.

Don't limit yourself.

Many people limit themselves to what

they think they can do.

You can go as far

as you mind lets you.

What you believe,

you can achieve.

-Mary Kay Ash

back to school photo's

Last week my work contacted me
to see if i could come in and help out with a route
in the mornings.
Specifically
the first day of school.
Since they are short drivers
they were in dire need
and for a brief moment--
a very brief moment--
i actually considered it?!

What was i thinking?

I am not normally a guilt ridden mom
and i am not super nostalgic
(although i do have my moments)
But the thought of missing the first day of school,
missing the back to school pictures?

NOWAY
was i going to be party to that!

So i let them down easy
and told them I would come in on Tuesday,
but Monday was NOT going to happen.
I couldn't live with the guilt
if i had missed this event.

So the dreaded first day came
whether i wanted it to or not
I tried to cover my head and ignore
the fact that it was here.
But those that were headed off
needed me to take their pictures
and imagine my surprise when i went outside
and it was on the cool side?
What a nice change!


So here they are
those pictures i couldn't live without
these two are the first ones out the door. This year the bus stop is right in front of our house.

They are also the children in uniforms.
Today they wore the wilder side of the colors that they are allowed--
purple
and
gold


The next one out was my sophmore

sporting brace free teeth this year

he better get going on his liscense,
since his ride is a senior
and won't be around much longer


then my little one waited for the bus to come

and how cute is the Elmo back pack

he was busy letting the dog know how much he was going to miss her. I don't think she felt the same because when the bus came she was barking for joy and didn't stop until it had pulled away.

and the last one out the door was my senior. She gets to sleep in a bit this year since she has no first hour.













And as the last one pulled away
i realized i was all alone
back to my routine
(whatever that is)
and a smile crept up on my face
and i did a small happy dance.