Sunday, August 24, 2008

R-rated movies and porn

As you can tell by the title
this should be a rather interesting topic.
It has been at our house today.
Nothing like Sunday dinner--
watching your children squirm in their seats,
wanting to be anywhere but where they are.
Wishing that the conversation would change
and knowing that they are captive.
Generally food eases the pain
of an awkward discussion
.
Generally we don't have these discussions
for Sunday dinner--
but today was the exception to both rules.

When our oldest was 4 days old
(and we were naive parents--
not knowing how to raise this youngin')
we took her to an R-rated movie.
As i recall she slept through it--
hopefully she is not too scarred from our choice.
The funny thing is that i can even remember
this dumb movie.
It was a movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger
called Total Recall.
I can't totally recall why it was rated R
but i remember thinking
"why are we taking the little one to it?"

Some where along the line
we grew up and decided
that we would no longer view R-rated movies.
Our prophet had asked us not to--
and every time I did
I questioned why i thought my judgement was better
than a prophets.
Aren't we given guidance to help us in this journey of life-
then why do we blatantly ignore it?
For the most part
I have not missed these movies.
On occasion i miss the historical based movies
that are rated R, due to the nature of what took place.
But i figure do i really need the visual to understand
the atrocity of what man can do to each other?

I have had others recommend R movies to me
and when i explain that i don't watch R movies
I get the "your weird" look
I then explain that i don't need to fill my brain
with additional garbage--
and they proceeded to tell me
"Well the movie wasn't that bad....
except for this one part and then i guess this other part..."
So i guess i just don't want those "parts" in my brain.
It has been easier to encourage our children
not to see these movies
when we don't.
I don't like to play the role of a
Hypocrite.
Being a parent is hard enough
without your children pointing out your faults.
Our children seeing R-rated movies
hasn't really been much of an issue--
or so i thought.

So why am I spilling my past
well I will let you into a glimpse of my life
and where i am going with this train of thought

I love teaching Sunday school
and talking with the kids
and seeing what is going on in their lives.
And sometimes you stumble upon information
quite by accident.
Sometimes they don't say anything-
maybe it is just a look
that has you inquiring for more information.
That was the case today.
I found out that a group of kids
(including mine)
went to the movies last night
and all but three went to an R-rated movie
I am happy to report
that thanks to my fine example
(well not really)
but thanks to smart children
who are trying to do what is right
two of those three were mine.
I am very proud of the them and the fact
that they stood up for their beliefs.
That they chose to be the ones that made a wise choice
without us being there to help them, to guide them.
That they have heard the things being taught to them
and have listened and obeyed.
That they chose to be different,
even among kids who have been taught similar lessons.
Now if you ask my son about the movie he did see
his response was something like this
"I don't really know what it was about
It was some dumb chick flick."

Now onto the "Porn" portion of this entry
My husband had porn on the brain--
not the actually visual
but wanting to discuss it with our children
and the insidious problem it is becoming in our society.
How it is so addictive
and destroys lives and marriages.
What constitutes porn
and what they should do if they stumble upon it.
It is so much easier to view these images these days
and if you can do everything to avoid it
how much better off you will be.
It is much easier to never have the problem
than to try to get rid of it
once it is a problem.
Life is hard enough without addictions.

By the time we finished talking
my children were ready to be done with dinner
willing to clean the kitchen
and put away the food.
Anything to get away from the table.
So for now
the porn discussion
has been tabled
i am sure it will be talked about another day
not the most fun discussion
but one that needed to take place non the less.
You have to warn your children of all the evils of the world.
Things that were never really an issue for us growing up.
It is sad that the list of evils
continues to grow....
and as new things are added
we will continue to discuss them
even if it does make us
or our kids uncomfortable......

3 comments:

middle age mormon mother said...

Good job mom! You are working hard at raising righteous children. Pat your kids on the back for making a positive choice when presented with peer pressure. My son and daughter walked out of a PG13 movie last night because of the content. Pretty soon we'll all have to stay home rather than go to any movies.

Annette said...

SO true.

John McCook said...

How it makes my heart hurt for the kids that did not make the same decision as your kids did. Wasn't it just six days before that church was about avoiding unhealthy media. Kids.... you buy them the books but sometimes they just eat the pages. I won't give up and you don't either. I'm glad you spoke with your kids about porn and its harmful effects. I'm shocked how it has become a problem for even the girls at times. It can be so addictive.